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[–][deleted] 6 years ago* [recovered] (9 children) | Copy Link
Having a baby face means you can hit on younger girls. That's hardly a disadvantage (unless you're 18 or close to it).
Slow down your movements and your speech, have a solid walk, aim to be upright and comfortable in your posture whenever you're stationary. Don't invest too much with your body language. If you're not looking at someone directly while talking/listening, then effect an air of being bored or spaced out.
I have a wittiness "problem" too and the easiest way to deal with it is to slow down your speech and be an active listener. In terms of what you say, you don't have to change much at all (because banter is largely irrelevant) but you should be aggressive about expressing your sexual attraction, tease her, and deep dive into her life as the conversation progresses.
You want to be the most honest version of yourself possible but tweaked a bit to maximize attractiveness. I've found you can largely remain honest in what you say and most of the adjustments that need to be made are to the nonverbals and also making sure to express your attraction genuinely. You don't need to fit the typical masculine archetype beyond that.
As you seem to realize, trying to change too much of your personality will fail because you'll eventually be discovered as incongruous. Often before you have sex (thus precluding it). The way forward is to make small adjustments mostly to things that don't involve your personality.
[–][deleted] 6 years ago [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link
Thanks!
As a follow up, how exactly do you express your sexual attraction? I absolutely need to work on kino, but when you’ve just met a girl randomly at a bar outside of immediately saying hey you look good, how do you establish that?
And yea I don’t want to change my personality too much, but I’ve come to realize a lot of my personality was driven by people pleasing and wanting others to like me so I feel like I still need to develop who I really am.
[–][deleted] 4 points5 points6 points 6 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
This really explains why people think im older than I am. Im 24 and have always attracted older women since I was 19. Recently I hit it off with a 35 and 33 year old who thought I was a similar age. But what you described is my natural demeaor. I'm generally a low energy dude and in my head a lot.
So OP, know what he's saying really works.
[–][deleted] 6 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
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[–][deleted] 6 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
How does this work in real life? I know it’s a movie but let’s take Ryan Gossling in crazy stupid love. When he approaches he seems laid back, lackadaisical. Probably similar to what you’re saying.
But in real life for me at least I need to be a little more energized to want to go to a bar or club, to have fun and to approach women. So it feels like to me the whole be bored and just have fun and have high energy are conflicting.
[–]whirleymon 4 points5 points6 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Lift weights, and eat more protein.
[–]mez_lin 2 points3 points4 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Testosterone injections on the reg.
[–]parfiant 2 points3 points4 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Check out the Genuine Man series of articles by Hector Castillo on girlschase. But basically you need to go through a massive douchebag asshole phase to cultivate that edge and you tone it down later on but that edge will still be there and girls and guys alike will feel it. You will automatically go on the offensive if someone tries to step on your boundaries, etc.
[–]jenny_from_da_bloc 1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Eye contact, chew gum to develop your jawline, work out, trim your hair short on the sides and back and wear a badass jacket. Act confident, do not act like an asshole though.
Having said this, I lack in most of these departments.
[–][deleted] 6 years ago [recovered] (2 children) | Copy Link
I know everyone says workout but do you think the idea to get jacked to the point where people can notice you workout with clothes on?
So I’m a realllly skinny guy naturally, I’m about 165lbs now and before working out I was about 125. The problem is that I look slim/fit, but with clothes on I’m not exactly screaming oh he must workout his arms are huge.
[–]jenny_from_da_bloc 3 points4 points5 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I'd say sually it is noticeable even if you are not buff. At least your back/shoulders will look wider and your visible skin will look toned. No need to be a body builder on my opinion.
[–]High-__-there 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Girls don’t care. Im skinny af and get lots,. What’s important is you mental strength, your inner constitution
[–]smoothmax 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Your inner feelings of masculinity are more important. If you accept and embrace those feelings they will help determine how you are perceived. If you have masculine energy and charisma, women will notice. Many gay men have strong looking faces and beards.
[–]DaysThatEndInDie 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Baby will work in your favor as you get older, be sure to take care of your skin. Make that baby face work for you in the long game. Not having facial hair isn’t that big of a deal. Lots of guys can’t grow a beard. No biggie. Carry yourself with confidence. Male or female, confidence goes a long way. Do lots of outdoor stuff, it don’t have to be crazy intense stuff like chopping wood or building a fence, playing frisbee with friends, walking your dog, riding your bike is just fine.
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Corner stone of masculinity is being strong. Lift weights , get jacked, get confident, get more self assured.
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