Hi all,

I am just going into the negotiation phase between my STBXW's attorney and mine. I'm gutted and confused, but that's beside the point. It's beginning to get nasty and I have no idea how much damage she'll try to do.

We have an 8 yr old son with whom I have a warm and loving relationship. But his mother runs his emotions, so no telling where he and I go from here. Wife and I both have the flexibility to live anywhere due to remote jobs. She is relocating to mid-coast Maine where we have lived before. There is nothing there for me. But there also isn't really anything for me anywhere else. I lived for them, and will now be alone. But there is a whole lot more going on where we are now than up there.

I've been advised to live rather close to them in order to be involved with my son's day-to-day. But that's not going to really happen. She is super controlling and will create all the distance she feels like. I'm an 'old dad' and don't know that I'd want anything like 50/50 custody. I've taken full care of him for a week at a time in the past, and I really enjoy it, but it's a lot. And I'm sure she'd fight it tooth and nail.

We make similar salaries plus I'll retire soon, so I guess child support isn't too much of an issue. I'm thinking of just asking for unlimited visitation and let the chips fall.

So, do I stay in this area which I enjoy, a few hours away from them, and just see how often he wants to visit, or do I stay close and 'fight' for more involvement?

EDIT: Yes, I realize that I posted something similar a few weeks(?) ago. And yes, the replies to that question really did change/make up my mind not to go far, far away. But a lot has transpired since then, and new questions/decisions continue to arise. There is a lot of wisdom in this group, and I sorta reframed the questions around my current thinking. So, apologies if this is repetitive.