My SO and I are currently on cloud nine, as long as his brother is not there to disrupt our life. My SO and his brother are born only 12 Months apart, they share an incredibly strong bond which I always respected and supported. Although his brother (M) has always been against our relationship.

In M‘s Eyes I was a gold digging floozy. When that did not hold up to reality I was a prude unable to satisfy SO‘s needs. Then M tried for overnight visits when his job was lost. (😠 the company) I felt like I ran a B&B. SO and I had to Sneak around for couple time. Sometimes he would arrive at 3am - waking me up or blocking the bath in the morning. I had to give up sleeping in underwear, summer being hot and humid notwithstanding. Isnt there a better feeling then to have the brother of your partner waking you up at 5am to ask you where the xcxc is? Or having him disturb your work routine?

Then I carefully advised that it might be best if M and SO spoke about M‘s clinginess from brother to brother. SO was not agreeable, his respect and admiration for his younger brother being too strong.

When we reconciled after our disastrous last spring I had made it a requirement that my SO deal with his brother to ensure we were able to have a true couple‘s life. He went to IC. All seemed well.

Now M is back, he lost his new job. Now he is - again living on the couch and want constant ego kibbles. SO told me that his decision to host his brother is final. I asked him how long he anticipated his brother staying and he was waffling around until M shot him an angry look. (M gave us his old, failing car when it was not getting the TÜV without being repaired) SO immediately folded ( he needs me to drive him with the car) and told me to mind my own business. Hen I told him that he could stay - no timeframe given.

I pleaded with my SO to think about us, our relationship and the promise we gave each other for our new partnership. He ignored me.

Yesterday his brother went up at me during family get together, at my family. My Family was totally irritated by the harsh words and digs at me.

SO , not without reason, fears my family got a negative opinion on both M and him.

Help, how do I help my SO get his bearings and stop the disaster?