Respect

CountTheBees · 2023-08-20T06:53:43+00:00

There's no reason your man has to be someone on MRP or even redpilled. I'm getting the impression that you are single? Please correct me if I'm wrong because this question will hit very different depending on whether you are single or in a relationship where you feel disrespected. The rest of my answer I am assuming you are single and are asking hypothetically.

Most of us are in relationships with Greater Betas. Speaking from my own experience, my guy adores me and lets me get away with a lot, hence my desire to "give back" and make him happy. You generally don't have to be the "perfect RPW" and use all the strategies all the time in a relationship to be happy or to make your man happy. There's a lot of leeway and a lot of individual preferences that contradict standard RPW advice.

If you read For Women Only or the chapter on Respect & Love you'll see that the author assumes a very loving relationship where occasionally the husband and wife misunderstand each other. You should feel loved in a relationship.

Yougotmetripping · 2023-08-20T07:29:18+00:00

It's interesting to see this post. I also feel the MRP is disrespectful toward women. My husband is not necessarily red pilled and I actually am grateful for that. I feel like that community is misogynistic and treat women like meat. It is hugely unfair.

I use RP as a way to get what I want and maybe that's manipulative. I do think men are easily swayed by their partners opinions, it's just knowing how to go about it. And that's what I do. For a long time I was unhappy in my marriage and it's only after RPW did I realise how to treat my husband. I may not be like others on here I admit that. But so far this is working for me.

Ok_Outside149 · 2023-08-20T09:19:41+00:00

Well I think everyone deserves respect in that general human way, like I treat people I come across kindly and hold open doors, make space for them etc. In relationships though, you’re not supposed to reward mediocre character. You have to vet to determine if they’re worthy of your wifely respect. Don’t give your love and life to any old Tom Dick or Harry. Don’t follow someone you don’t trust.

Ok-Promotion-861 · 2023-08-20T11:39:36+00:00

As an adult use your discernment. Do they deserve to be respected? I don’t understand why women on RPW eat things up and accept disrespect

Wife_and_Mama · 2023-08-20T14:06:36+00:00

I love this space. There's some excellent advice here. I wouldn't call myself trad, because I don't like to align with larger movements. I enjoy the crossover, though, because I agree with a lot of it. I'm still not calling my husband an authority figure. That just feels like roleplay to me. He's my husband. That means far more than "authority figure."

If you're not comfortable with this, you can leave it in the toolbox that is RPW. I did and I have a very healthy, mutually respectful marriage. I'll add that my husband would never read TRP or MRP. I'd have considered that a red flag while dating.

imthatgirl_tm · 2023-08-20T12:11:39+00:00

Use discretion. Not everyman has what it takes to be a good husband and father. Your relationship should add value to your life, not stress. Good luck

InevitableKiwi5776 · 2023-08-20T13:22:49+00:00

I don’t think anyone here advocates accepting bad treatment. Women are encouraged to look at their behavior and consider what their contribution to their problem might be instead of assuming the man must be solely at fault, which is the default in most other forums.

In fact, the standard advice that is given is to find a man that you respect and are attracted to, if either of those is missing or minimal, there’s not a ton you can do about it. So we assume you are with a man you respect, who deserves your respect.

Showing respect to your man is essential for the health of the relationship, and it’s something that many men say is missing in their relationships, so, logically, it’s something we should pay attention to to keep our relationships strong. For a lot of women nowadays, it’s not obvious how we show respect and disrespect, so discussing it it helpful in reflecting on our own experiences.

ArkNemesis00 · 2023-08-20T15:53:50+00:00

Demanding better treatment is rarely an effective strategy for anyone - it's unattractive behavior especially when things are rocky.

What works better is to inspire better treatment. Humans often form little feedback loops: you said something mean to me? I'll say something mean back, you apologized to me? I'll apologize back. So, if you make a solid attempt at stopping a negative feedback loop and turning into positive, you often see your partner reciprocate your efforts.

It's dangerous to expect any specific positive action in return - that would be a covert contract - and it might take a few tries before your partner can correctly interpret that you're being nice and be in a space to appreciate it.

Stop reading MRP if that's your interpretation and it's making you bitter. You're hurting yourself and your partner because of what some internet dudes are up to. Fixing them is out of your control. Controlling your partner's actions is out of your control. Focus on your actions. Focus on how your partner responds. Then act accordingly. Your choice of partner is something you can change.

Simple_Basket_8224 · 2023-08-21T04:12:38+00:00

You shouldn’t date a man who isn’t already respectable. At the end of the day that is your own fault for choosing men who are not worthy of respect. You cannot change someone in any fundamental way, I respect my boyfriend but he’s because an amazing man who I would adore as my husband, a man I’d be proud to have as a father of my children.

Honestly you’ll never see Andrew Tate men with any valuable women. You’ll never see them with the women they say they “truly” want, because no such women would ever even entertain a relationship with a guy like that. You’ll just see them with the exact women they seem to hate.. promiscuous women who use them for their money because that is what they flaunt and therefore who they attract.

Personally I don’t really buy most of their arguments anyway. It’s not your job as woman to change the dynamic of a relationship or to take the lead. Any good man will take the lead for you and show YOU what it means to really be loved and cared for. Then you will automatically flourish.

Jenneapolis · 2023-08-20T16:54:22+00:00

If you find your man to be a mediocre character and believe you can do better with someone new then find a new man. However if you’ve determined he is who you want to be with and the best you will get, then it is to your benefit to invest in him and the way you do that is respect.

You should not be a doormat heaping respect on someone who treats you poorly but this post sounds like you think it’s a better strategy to withhold respect and give it out sparingly almost as a reward for his good behavior. Someone has to be the bigger person and give first. Sometimes we have to apologize first. Usually this pays off, and his treatment of you will improve. If it never improves, then perhaps you do have a mediocre man who can’t meet your needs.

Ultimately, you do need to decide if you want to be respected (for your thinking) or cherished (for your feelings). Respect is the masculine need and you cannot have two masculine people in the relationship. If you want to be the masculine one, then you need to go for a man who is ok playing the feminine role. Getting To I Do outlines this very well.

HomeHornet · 2023-08-20T06:45:49+00:00

I don't have an answer, really. I am a man and have these same exact question. I see it as the cornerstone, the crux of the problem with the make RP sphere. Resolving the issue of how exactly respect is earned or given is also an existential lynchpin in the female RP philosophy. It requires careful thought, debate and written work.

AutoModerator · 2023-08-20T06:08:49+00:00

Title: Respect

Full text: Ok, I know all men we make our Partner are to be considered an authority that is to be respected. But is it not true that respectability is something that men need to show? Are we just heaping respect on them to placate them? Rewarding mediocre character with our very life and love? I am massively struggling with the deep and all-encompassing respect. I was raised to respect the respectable and RECEIVE respect by those around me for being respectable. And the flip side: Do the men we respect truly love us? Show us they live in a way we recognize? Most so it just their own way, not caring if we see it because „ma masculinity“ ? Should we not be wayyy more selective with our respect? Our praise and support? Because reading MRP no man there sees women as human beings, just holes for fucking and emotional gratification on their terms. Massive Manipulation is used against us women! To mold us into perfect robots that cook, fuck and adore.

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Legal-Negotiation-12 · 2023-08-20T20:50:25+00:00

Men absolutely need to show respectability. If he isn’t addressing your needs and meeting them, then there is little chance he will be respected.

Tbh I think very few men realize this and I had to learn it as well, but as a woman. In previous relationships I got sooooooo disrespectful and the men were right to check me on it, but I also brought up how oftentimes, they were not being considerate of my needs and of me period. Somehow, their feelings of respect dominated my existence as a person.

Your question of, “Do the men we respect truly love us?” is an excellent question. I think being angered with, disappointed in, and hurt by your partner is v normal. But I think feeling unloved or unlovable by them is something different. I hope you are not experiencing the latter + I hope that this rocky time period in the relationship ends soon. ♥️

ClarityByHilarity · 2023-08-21T01:39:20+00:00

Oh dear God I would hate dating a MRP or #redpill man. My husband doesn’t even know what that is. He does know, how to respect me, how to lead and how to make me feel secure in trusting him as the head of our household.

I hate the MRP spaces. I think they are toxic and half the guys are jobless neckbeards or Andrew Tate worshipers just cosplaying.

Title	Respect
Author	Such_Beginning_1629
Upvotes	9
Comments	26
Date	August 20, 2023 6:08 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/15w39ru/respect/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/respect.1229100 https://theredarchive.com/post/1229100

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