Why do girls claim to want one thing and then go for the complete opposite?

frequentlywrong · 2015-10-04T09:39:32+00:00

I think the qualities such as "loving, kind, trustworthy, etc.." fall into the relationship spectrum. They're not lying when they say they want these things. They do. But from a high value man.

Attraction is a whole other thing. It's mostly physical and superficial. It has to meet a certain threshold or the man never even has a chance.

Women (people in general) fail to understand themselves. They want companionship and the fast life at the same time. Unfortunately, life doesn't work that way. You either pick one or the other. The thing is that the fast life is easy and offers instant gratification while the long term route requires work and sacrifice.

Life is short and you could die at any moment. It makes just as much sense to live the fast life as it does to go the family route.

ShounenEgo · 2015-10-04T15:43:27+00:00

They actually want those traits. The white lie of the entire thing is that they want those traits on the right guys, aka. the "assholes" who lift etc.

It's like... You keep saying that you want a tamed bird and you have to choose between taming an eagle and a canary. Even if all tamed birds share similar behaviors, the girls want the tamed eagle. Yet, when you asked them, they give you the description of the tamed bird, which all tamed birds share.

BrunoOh · 2015-10-04T16:01:51+00:00

Women see three genders; women, Men (alphas) and males (betas and others).

Whenever something like this comes up, they are referring to Men.

648262 · 2015-10-04T11:19:07+00:00

Society, meaning our family and culture (TV) tells us this is what a man should do and women should want. Both men and women grow up believing this. It's the logical thing to want, to a certain extent.

The emotional aspect is different. Women tend to make a lot of decisions based on their emotions, and when they meet a man that eats testosterone as part of his breakfast-cereal they tend to become emotional about it.

The perfect LTR-man is someone who naturally balances on the golden ratio between alphabeta. Good genes, but also sticks around.

[deleted] · 2015-10-04T12:34:50+00:00

Because what you want is not necessarily what you are attracted to. I want to get out of bed early, go to the gym and eat healthy. I want it because I know that's what's good for me. And I'll tell myself and everyone I know that's what I want. Comes morning and I can be bothered getting out of bed, will look for any excuse not to go to the gym, and rationalise why candies and a soda right now are not going to be that bad for me. It takes efforts to silence your instinctive cravings and actually do what you want to do and say you want to do. Girls know very well drug dealers, thugs and other alphas are not good for them, but they can't resist the craving, in this case the tingles.

[deleted] · 2015-10-04T15:35:13+00:00

Plausible deniability. When they settle for an office job fatty they can claim they always said they never liked those buff macho men anyway.

Ricky_Redrick · 2015-10-04T16:04:36+00:00

"Pay attention to what she does, not what she says"

Seems to me like a lot of women spout this stuff to avoid sounding like sluts.

VasiliyZaitzev · 2015-10-04T17:11:42+00:00

Women are super-great at lying to themselves as a means of self-preservation. Thus, after getting boned by some random, she'll tell her friends "Oh, it just happened", because that sounds a shit-ton better than "Oh, c'mon, you know what a slut I am!"

ThrowingMyslfOutther · 2015-10-05T14:44:33+00:00

Because they don't know what they really want and all they are doing is parroting the shit they see in movies and TV.

I.E. They want a prince, thinking they are a princess.

M3_Drifter · 2015-10-04T10:50:13+00:00

every girl I know claims to want an intelligent, sweet guy [...]

Because this is what they think they want. And mostly, they do want this stuff, as long as he doesn't become feminine. They just also want a bunch of other stuff like independent, takes the lead, has an opinion, doesn't put up with BS, ripped body, etc.

And when it comes down to it, the "hard" values embodied by the thugs are what gives her tingles. If she could find a sensitive thug, she'd never let go.

mylatestindulgence · 2015-10-04T08:55:55+00:00

Because like anything in life they want what's valuable, but once you have it the value is gone (or at least greatly diminished). If I gave a poor man $100 he'd be ecstatic. But, every time I give him $100 it's a little bit less of a big deal. Once he's got millions of dollars, that $100 is worth barely a thing to him, and value takes a completely different form, perhaps an experience is worth more now. Maybe that's not a perfect example, but you see what I mean.

Title	Why do girls claim to want one thing and then go for the complete opposite?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	13
Comments	18
Date	October 4, 2015 8:31 AM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/3nfnd9/why_do_girls_claim_to_want_one_thing_and_then_go/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/why-do-girls-claim-to-want-one-thing-and-then-go.154709 https://theredarchive.com/post/154709

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