Guys, I know this shit is hard. For me? The hardest thing emotionally I have ever done in my entire life (which is saying something).

I just want you to know that you matter. You are enough. You loved and you lost and that hurts like hell, but you are here, and your love is still marking the world around you in the smallest and subtlest of ways.

Sometimes we need a harsh word from a brother to survive: don’t “simp;” get fucked; work out; work hard; etc. etc.

Fine.

But sometimes we need a tender word to remember who we are beneath it all:

You loved your wife. You were building your family. You were content with your life. You were desiring peace above all. And you had all of that ripped away.

Probably in a moment. Maybe because some new asshole came along and started building his own home on the foundation you laid. Whatever it is, however it went, I want you to know that I see you. And here, in some strange way, it seems that we can all see each other, invisible as we all feel in most other places.

It’s sometimes so hard to believe that so many of us are in the exact same place and that we could go a lifetime never knowing or acknowledging it. Muscling through, sometimes literally, to avoid the fact that this grief is real and deep and lasting…and shared.

But this grief says so much about who you are and how deeply you love and how much you can hurt. Because you don’t choose vulnerability. You choose love. And to quote C. S. Lewis: “To love at all is to be vulnerable.”

So for today? You deserve to love yourself the way you need and that ultimately only you can. I hope today gives you even a breath of relief.