The title captures it. I (52m) have been separated from my wife for 12 months and finalized the divorce six months ago. (I know, it’s been a quick turnaround.) I’ve been following the advice people give: focusing on my children, working out, spending quality time with friends and family, working hard, volunteering, and even attending therapy (though I’ve realized I need more of it, so I’m getting back on track).

I got lonely and started casually dating a fair number of people. About two months ago, I met a woman in her 40s, and we had great chemistry and a strong connection, which also led to great sex. I really like her, and I set boundaries about where I am in my life and my readiness for a relationship. However, she told me that she feels like she’s falling in love with me. I told her that I can’t say that at this point, but that I am attracted to her. Her openness about her feelings made me think more about my own, and I realized that I’m still hung up on my ex and that I’m not emotionally ready to be in any kind of relationship right now, even casual. My actions of closeness regardless of my words probably told her I was more available than I am and so I have to break it off with her. I plan to talk to her this week. Dating apps are also deleted.

With that background, I’m interested in any recommendations for men’s retreats or programs that have been beneficial. I’d like to steer clear of anything that leans towards cult-like or red-pill ideologies that I don’t subscribe to. But I want to get it the core of some of my issues both from the marriage and the divorce.

I genuinely appreciate this community and know that I’m not alone in feeling this way. Thanks for any advice you may have.

Cheers!