On the verge of separation, I would like to hear from the folks here....

gammaglobe · 2026-06-11T15:24:24+00:00

Sexual compatibility is a wrong term here. Women that can't pair bond rely on novelty to feel alive. This means either you come up with new stuff all the time. Not GREAT, but new. Kinks, BDSM, cuckold, swinging etc. Or she is cheating (not necessarily with a better compatible partner, rather new). This is because they lack internal source of dopamine. They rely heavily on their partners to provide excitement. As soon as relashinships enter stable (oxytocin) phase - they feel unhappy. And that's the reason they cheat and break relationships again, and may start missing the first husband.

It's neurological pathology. Or maybe evolutionary way to keep gene pool rotating. But I bet a few dollars most wives discussed on this sub are ADHD.

KingJon85 · 2026-06-11T14:13:16+00:00

1.My ex built a relationship with someone else behind my back.

No way in hell would I give her another chance. I gave her plenty of chances.
They say that physical attraction may be a little less important past 40, but would you date someone who is ugly? Most women won't either. Get and stay fit.
I tried to work it out for my kids for many years. I found my wife physically attractive, but she was just a terrible person with zero sense of accountability. She couldn't see past her own nose.

guy_n_cognito_tu · 2026-06-11T13:32:46+00:00

"Sexual compatibility" is definitely A reason for divorce, but I'd be skeptical of any attorney that thinks it's the reason for MOST divorces.

Chances of reunion aren't zero, but near zero.

Physical attraction is always important, but I think it becomes less important once you get older and realize how important mental compatibility is.

Yes.

Admirable-Builder788 · 2026-06-11T12:15:03+00:00

Mine came suddenly and hurtfully towards me. It was all primarily done so her and her mother could sell off the house that I paid for. They filed a false police report against me originally intending to get me slapped with a restraining order from the property so they could do what they wanted with the property, and unfortunately the po-dunk county we live in decided to milk the situation financially and arrested me 2 weeks after the report was made. After that happened, in order to not take any accountability for what she did, she took our son and dissapeared for over 2 month with zero contact. Her mom was pretty apologetic about what happened, but the person my wife became to avoid accountability was no longer who I married. Never, ever, get back with someone you divorced, not even just saying that because of my own situation, but I've seen it get so bad for people that take their exes back. Remember the old saying "an ex is an ex for a reason". Be amicable, be friendly, but never be more than that. As far as the intimacy thing goes, that honestly just boils down to communication. I know people in their 50s who get it on like rabbits still, and I know people in their 20s who rarely ever do stuff like that, and the ones who are happiest are the ones who mutually communicate about it.

ClumsyMusic · 2026-06-11T10:36:25+00:00

IMO I think it all comes down to communication. Once you can no longer have a conversation while respecting each other, all the problems stack. Sexual attraction is important but it can also fade. If you truly love each other, that starts to matter less. My marriage was scarred very early with infidelity. If we learned how to communicate and take care of each others needs, we could have overcome. We almost did. Sadly I’m starring at a divorce. We failed at communicating through it all. And healing from infidelity is tough. It take 2 willing participants. That was almost 4 years ago. I’m just now starting to heal from that. A little too late. If you want to work it out. It starts with healthy communication. I failed a good amount in that, but I was also angry-from the infidelity. Sorry you’re going through this. - we did not share any children. Just one beautiful pup.

Longjumping-Method56 · 2026-06-11T09:11:39+00:00

My advice is if you are not currently getting divorced the in the house is in your name if you have one that is put it into a irrevocable trust if it still has a mortgage and the divorce is current then force the sale of the house don't let her have it because most women are terrible with money and she will most likely waste all the money she gets from the house sale and whatever else she gets from the split and put your half into Coca cola dividend stocks and don't use any of it on the lawyer just take your time and pay him off over time with your earned income trust me its better that way because then you will have 2 incomes and that will help you far more than you realize

Title	On the verge of separation, I would like to hear from the folks here....
Author	dripindior_
Upvotes	2
Comments	8
Date	June 11, 2026 8:58 AM UTC (1 month ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1u2tokm/on_the_verge_of_separation_i_would_like_to_hear/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/on-the-verge-of-separation-i-would-like-to-hear.1582553 https://theredarchive.com/post/1582553

Comments