Is this the response I’m looking for?

thegoldengoat19 · 2020-12-03T19:01:21+00:00

Acting like my cocky asshole self. Constantly breaking rapport with teases. She said that I'm an asshole 99% of the time and nice 1% but that somehow that...

[–]Ben_Eszes9 points 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]ClickKlakk3 points 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

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[–]ClickKlakk2 points 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

I'd say it's contextual, and you can't just say being called an asshole is good, but being called a dick isn't. It depends on the circumstances and the female emotions behind it.

Of course. I’m just speaking from experience with lots of different women. And the common cliche that “women love assholes”. And the shared experiences of tons of other men.

I guess my point in asking is to say that you don't need to be a jerk (or act like one) in order to be respected and desired by women.

Most definitely not.

From u/VasiliyZaitzev

Why ‘Assholes’ Get Laid, And You Don’t

https://archive.is/FoBAb

In TRP parlance an "asshole" isn't the guy who is the most arrogant, rude and obnoxious. When Nice Guys and White Knights refer to a man as an "asshole" it simply means that the "asshole" is a guy who is willing to put his own needs and wants and desires ahead of m'lady's, and take what he wants in life (within the bounds of the law, ofc).

Which is exactly what girls mean when they slap your arm and smile.

Women communicate covertly. They look for action based information to categorize you. Being an “asshole” demonstrates and signals the behavior of status, and is indicative of a personality that won't be walked over, which is attractive.

In fact, I think taking that path is going to be more headache and problems in the long run. But who knows. Just be yourself .. don't try to be or act in a way that isn't authentic to who you are as an individual.

You’re all over it. The point is to be congruent with what it actually means to be the high value man that is inside of all of us and that every woman craves. If you’re an asshole because you’re focused on your mission and your priorities take precedent over anything else, that’s attractive. If you’re an asshole because you’re focused on getting with a particular woman, you’re a creepy dick.

And if you are naturally a jerk, then I'd invest some time/energy into figuring out why, and seek to fix it. Life's too short ..

We all are naturally a jerk. You go against that and become unattractive.

Here’s what u/woujo has to say on the topic

It is not as simple as saying "women like assholes." Women are attracted to men who are confident, dominant, protective of their resources, and focused on their purposes with such a flaming intensity that they will completely ignore and brush aside anybody that is not actively contributing to their mission. Of course, these types of people oftentimes come across as assholes to people who are trying to undeservedly siphon their resources or attention, but they are not really being assholes. An "asshole" is somebody who wrongly or unfairly hurts people who don't deserve it - that's not what the alpha male is doing - he is preventing others from wrongly or unfairly hurting him. Furthermore, men who act this way are characterized as "assholes" by popular culture and entertainment because our society expects men to bow down and serve women for absolutely nothing in return, so any man that does not do that is an "asshole." But it is not asshole behavior that women are attracted to - it is the alpha male behavior they are attracted to.

In fact, if a woman feels or consciously realizes that you are purposely being an asshole to her to score points she will instantly lose attraction. The alpha male acts like an "asshole" because he is emotionally invested in his mission, but if you act like an asshole because you are emotionally invested in the woman you have completely missed the point.

Take a high value guy like Brad Pitt or Jay-Z: those guys aren't assholes to women because they are mad, butthurt, or because they are carrying out some PUA script - they are "assholes" because they just genuinely don't give a fuck about women until those women do something really awesome to prove their value.

The part of this post about signaling is correct, however. Men and women are guided by their emotions because it is impossible to rationally observe and calculate every piece of information, so they rely on the emotional signals they receive from other people. For example, if you are worried about whether the tribe is in trouble, instead of trying to figure it out for yourself, which would be too hard, you can just look at the alpha male: If he is calm, then you can feel calm too. This is why seemingly unimportant signals make a huge difference to women.

[–]ClickKlakk1 point 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

I'd say it's contextual, and you can't just say being called an asshole is good, but being called a dick isn't. It depends on the circumstances and the female emotions behind it.

Of course. I’m just speaking from experience with lots of different women. And the common cliche that “women love assholes”. And the shared experiences of tons of other men.

I guess my point in asking is to say that you don't need to be a jerk (or act like one) in order to be respected and desired by women.

Most definitely not.

From u/VasiliyZaitzev

Why ‘Assholes’ Get Laid, And You Don’t

https://archive.is/FoBAb

In TRP parlance an "asshole" isn't the guy who is the most arrogant, rude and obnoxious. When Nice Guys and White Knights refer to a man as an "asshole" it simply means that the "asshole" is a guy who is willing to put his own needs and wants and desires ahead of m'lady's, and take what he wants in life (within the bounds of the law, ofc).

Which is exactly what girls mean when they slap your arm and smile.

Women communicate covertly. They look for action based information to categorize you. Being an “asshole” demonstrates and signals the behavior of status, and is indicative of a personality that won't be walked over, which is attractive.

In fact, I think taking that path is going to be more headache and problems in the long run. But who knows. Just be yourself .. don't try to be or act in a way that isn't authentic to who you are as an individual.

You’re all over it. The point is to be congruent with what it actually means to be the high value man that is inside of all of us and that every woman craves. If you’re an asshole because you’re focused on your mission and your priorities take precedent over anything else, that’s attractive. If you’re an asshole because you’re focused on getting with a particular woman, you’re a creepy dick.

And if you are naturally a jerk, then I'd invest some time/energy into figuring out why, and seek to fix it. Life's too short ..

We all are naturally a jerk. You go against that and become unattractive.

Here’s what u/woujo has to say on the topic

It is not as simple as saying "women like assholes." Women are attracted to men who are confident, dominant, protective of their resources, and focused on their purposes with such a flaming intensity that they will completely ignore and brush aside anybody that is not actively contributing to their mission. Of course, these types of people oftentimes come across as assholes to people who are trying to undeservedly siphon their resources or attention, but they are not really being assholes. An "asshole" is somebody who wrongly or unfairly hurts people who don't deserve it - that's not what the alpha male is doing - he is preventing others from wrongly or unfairly hurting him. Furthermore, men who act this way are characterized as "assholes" by popular culture and entertainment because our society expects men to bow down and serve women for absolutely nothing in return, so any man that does not do that is an "asshole." But it is not asshole behavior that women are attracted to - it is the alpha male behavior they are attracted to.

In fact, if a woman feels or consciously realizes that you are purposely being an asshole to her to score points she will instantly lose attraction. The alpha male acts like an "asshole" because he is emotionally invested in his mission, but if you act like an asshole because you are emotionally invested in the woman you have completely missed the point.

Take a high value guy like Brad Pitt or Jay-Z: those guys aren't assholes to women because they are mad, butthurt, or because they are carrying out some PUA script - they are "assholes" because they just genuinely don't give a fuck about women until those women do something really awesome to prove their value.

The part of this post about signaling is correct, however. Men and women are guided by their emotions because it is impossible to rationally observe and calculate every piece of information, so they rely on the emotional signals they receive from other people. For example, if you are worried about whether the tribe is in trouble, instead of trying to figure it out for yourself, which would be too hard, you can just look at the alpha male: If he is calm, then you can feel calm too. This is why seemingly unimportant signals make a huge difference to women.

[–]ClickKlakk1 point 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

I'd say it's contextual, and you can't just say being called an asshole is good, but being called a dick isn't. It depends on the circumstances and the female emotions behind it.

Of course. I’m just speaking from experience with lots of different women. And the common cliche that “women love assholes”. And the shared experiences of tons of other men.

I guess my point in asking is to say that you don't need to be a jerk (or act like one) in order to be respected and desired by women.

Most definitely not.

From u/VasiliyZaitzev

Why ‘Assholes’ Get Laid, And You Don’t

https://archive.is/FoBAb

In TRP parlance an "asshole" isn't the guy who is the most arrogant, rude and obnoxious. When Nice Guys and White Knights refer to a man as an "asshole" it simply means that the "asshole" is a guy who is willing to put his own needs and wants and desires ahead of m'lady's, and take what he wants in life (within the bounds of the law, ofc).

Which is exactly what girls mean when they slap your arm and smile.

Women communicate covertly. They look for action based information to categorize you. Being an “asshole” demonstrates and signals the behavior of status, and is indicative of a personality that won't be walked over, which is attractive.

In fact, I think taking that path is going to be more headache and problems in the long run. But who knows. Just be yourself .. don't try to be or act in a way that isn't authentic to who you are as an individual.

You’re all over it. The point is to be congruent with what it actually means to be the high value man that is inside of all of us and that every woman craves. If you’re an asshole because you’re focused on your mission and your priorities take precedent over anything else, that’s attractive. If you’re an asshole because you’re focused on getting with a particular woman, you’re a creepy dick.

And if you are naturally a jerk, then I'd invest some time/energy into figuring out why, and seek to fix it. Life's too short ..

We all are naturally a jerk. You go against that and become unattractive.

Here’s what u/woujo has to say on the topic

It is not as simple as saying "women like assholes." Women are attracted to men who are confident, dominant, protective of their resources, and focused on their purposes with such a flaming intensity that they will completely ignore and brush aside anybody that is not actively contributing to their mission. Of course, these types of people oftentimes come across as assholes to people who are trying to undeservedly siphon their resources or attention, but they are not really being assholes. An "asshole" is somebody who wrongly or unfairly hurts people who don't deserve it - that's not what the alpha male is doing - he is preventing others from wrongly or unfairly hurting him. Furthermore, men who act this way are characterized as "assholes" by popular culture and entertainment because our society expects men to bow down and serve women for absolutely nothing in return, so any man that does not do that is an "asshole." But it is not asshole behavior that women are attracted to - it is the alpha male behavior they are attracted to.

In fact, if a woman feels or consciously realizes that you are purposely being an asshole to her to score points she will instantly lose attraction. The alpha male acts like an "asshole" because he is emotionally invested in his mission, but if you act like an asshole because you are emotionally invested in the woman you have completely missed the point.

Take a high value guy like Brad Pitt or Jay-Z: those guys aren't assholes to women because they are mad, butthurt, or because they are carrying out some PUA script - they are "assholes" because they just genuinely don't give a fuck about women until those women do something really awesome to prove their value.

The part of this post about signaling is correct, however. Men and women are guided by their emotions because it is impossible to rationally observe and calculate every piece of information, so they rely on the emotional signals they receive from other people. For example, if you are worried about whether the tribe is in trouble, instead of trying to figure it out for yourself, which would be too hard, you can just look at the alpha male: If he is calm, then you can feel calm too. This is why seemingly unimportant signals make a huge difference to women.

Is this the response I’m looking for?

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Please Post Your Question to Forums.red/i/askTRP

Title	Is this the response I’m looking for?
Author	thegoldengoat19
Upvotes	5
Comments	17
Date	December 3, 2020 7:01 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/k63p1b/is-this-the-response-im-looking-for/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/is-this-the-response-im-looking-for.1596898 https://theredarchive.com/post/1596898