On hitting/sexual harassment

Pecanpig · 2013-02-27T03:11:49+00:00

You should be glad your neo-feminist mother didn't divorce your father while you were young, or you'd probably be in SRS right now.

ICEFARMER · 2013-02-27T03:26:32+00:00

Your dad was totally right. I would have hit your mother too if I saw her kicking a child in the head.

subzero_600 · 2013-02-27T03:16:15+00:00

It's a pet peev that some women out there feel that it's their right to be able to hit men, especially in the crotch with no consequences. No one should be allowed to hit another, no matter their sex. As for leering, both sexes do it, just seems like that men do it more often, but it is not a excuse to hit someone. Telling them not to if you start to feel uncomfortable is a good start.

Sounds like your father was a good man and did bring you up right.

2013-02-27T03:46:08+00:00

Also what about a man hitting a woman to defend someone the woman was hurting/hitting/sexually harassing?

I love it when people try to say that a man should never hit a woman because of the "power differential". Honestly, by that logic, the police would only be allowed to use force on trained individuals with firearms. If I see a woman or man being attacked, and I see that the person attacking them is smaller than I am, am I obligated to not use force to protect the victim?

Maybe instead of using sweeping generalizations to decide who can and can't use force and when, we say let the courts decide in a fair and unbiased manner what level of force was necessary to regain control of the situation.

Deansdale · 2013-02-27T11:05:37+00:00

There is a great problem in overmystifying reasonably small instances of interpersonal violence. It is a huge issue for feminists, a great tool to bash men with, but they made it impossible to have a reasonable discussion (or even a reasonable personal opinion) on violence.

Now, let me be clear: violence is bad. But there are cases when it is still a better option than any other options. If I saw a woman kicking a child in the head, I reckon even I'd slap her in the face and wouldn't waste a moment to blame myself for it. I think it is justified to stop a greater evil with a smaller one. And in this picture being a woman or man means nothing. Everybody should stand up to bullies and criminals (to a reasonable extent) and protect those who are weaker than themselves.

Also, as you have demonstrated, feminists are perfectly fine with violence, in fact they adore it - as long as it is committed by women against men. This is sexism at its worst, and of course shockingly hypocritical. Equality my ass.

4man · 2013-02-27T07:12:55+00:00

While I don't look forward with anticipation to striking anyone, I will defend myself against women or men. I accept that in defending myself against a woman I may be charged with assault, but I have to be alive to be charged (with anything) and if I don't defend myself that is not guaranteed.

Women are not special, they are simply female humans. No more and no less.

ICEFARMER · 2013-02-27T07:13:30+00:00

The hitting part is pretty simple. You should only be allowed to strike in defense. Size/gender of the attacker shouldn't matter. My brother used the "I'm younger/smaller/less mature" schtick at home all the time. He instigated the vast majority of our childhood spats. He's just that type of guy. I could be studying and be punched in the back of he head. I'd be reading a book and a foreign object would fly at me from across the room. You get the picture. He's a habitual line stepper and still is but not as bad. I was and am much larger, wrestled, boxed, and studied several eastern martial arts for many years but was always as academic as well. My brother was consistently 50lbs lighter, scrawny with an attitude (he also had a drug problem for many years which exacerbated things). I've always been patient and non violent. Saving my combative abilities to the ring and mat and otherwise only when needed I didn't and don't fight but will defend myself.

When we could come to blows I'd usually have put up with being hit and run for some time (that was his MO, hit you and lock himself in the bathroom or take off to a friends house and call mom, she knew what he was up to). He'd get cocky and not back down after a while and would throw cheap shots and try to get you to swing at him. I have hit my brother. At most in a single incident I hit him 5 times (2 he went down, cry and attack again, 1 more to drop him, repeat cry and attack, then 2 solid gut shots to take his wind away and fight done) but any other physical altercations usually ended in 1-2 shots. I was hit with hockey sticks, garbage cans, a bicycle, tools, a computer monitor, books, and a ton of other crap. I only ever hit him with my hands.

Despite all this the fall out was, I the honor student, the one with good grades and a job, would get in supreme shit from both parents especially mom. I was told I should have known better, it was unfair because I was bigger, had self defense training. I should have left the room (though he was usually following me wherever I went ignoring my parents direction to leave me alone), just let him do it and he'd get bored and go away because he was looking for a reaction, come get the folks and they'd make him stop (which was alway temporary because he'd wait and start again). The list of bullshit went on. My teen years were trying. Trying to keep my shit going and get into a good university was hard because my brother and his problems made it hard for all of us.

The TL;DR is someone can abuse their perceived weaker status making the situation unfair for the supposed "stronger" party and easier ro assault them. This is commonly abused. Protection for my smaller sibling striking me was BS because I'm bigger. Size/gender should not matter in cases of assault. However, if my attacker were a woman I'd be less quick to defend myself physically unless she were armed or there were exigent circumstances.

On the harassment issue, the neofem attitude you describe is sadly out of touch with reality (I'm amazed you were born but I have a feeling her opinions changed from when she was younger) and some guys could use a but more tact but humans aren't perfect.

rightsbot · 2013-02-27T03:08:17+00:00

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ChemPetE · 2013-02-27T06:55:50+00:00

If you have time, I certainly would be interested in reading about what you have to say about your upbringing.

blueoak9 · 2013-02-27T17:03:51+00:00

"I was raised by a neofeminist mother (which was a terrible thing, might write about it later if anyone is interested) "

Interested. Here's one upvote for that post already.

ta1901 · 2013-02-28T17:33:05+00:00

Your mom is a nut and I hope you aren't too screwed up to have a normal relationship.

Title	On hitting/sexual harassment
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	5
Comments	35
Date	February 27, 2013 3:06 AM UTC (13 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/mensrights/comments/19axr0/on-hittingsexual-harassment/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/on-hittingsexual-harassment.1607093 https://theredarchive.com/post/1607093

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