What were your lessons learned from LTR?

TFWnoLTR · 2018-10-11T17:53:49+00:00

No matter how great a gf she is while shes with you, no matter how genuine her love for you seems to be, when you split up it will slowly and painfully become very clear that she only ever cared about securing your commitment to her, and not at all about you as a person. She will hop on another dick so fast and they'll be just like you and her were.

The statement that shes not yours, it's just your turn, is the truest thing ever. Even having a child together won't change that.

Tidalnightmare · 2018-10-11T22:20:50+00:00

First one when I was 19 (20 years ago now...).

Learned that all girls are sluts, and they will soften the horrid truth to you, to maintain their cuddle-nest that you build together. On the flip side, also learned that they are human and do get upset by you leaving them, regardless of what TRP likes to preach.

Learned also that they will move on after you are gone, and all those times you fucked her til she was crying in your arms and completely wrecked on the bed mean nothing to her now and were just in the moment.

Latest LTR confirmed that women have not changed in 2 decades. They have got worse if anything. They are still human though and can bring softness and good times even though they are capable of forgetting you in an instant.

Awayhethrows1961 · 2018-10-11T17:38:22+00:00

This is obvious, but do not get into an LTR with a liberal feminist. I learned this the hard way.

itiswr1tten · 2018-10-11T19:00:14+00:00

If you don't have a rock fucking solid idea of what you want from each woman, who you are as a man, and who is #1 (hint, not her ever) you are gonna have A Bad Time.

For most guys that doesn't happen until late twenties earliest. Age isn't the cause but it sure is correlated.

So practice quantity strategies until you can define what quality means to you. Quality for some guys is an aloof high powered attorney who wants to fuck on her regular but kicks YOU out after half the time. Quality for other guys is a doting girlfriend who wants to give give give 100% of everything she has to her man.

The only way to learn what quality means to you is to seduce and fuck them until you catch a fish that is tough to release, then you release it anyway because you've internalized abundance. Manage expectations always and never let the fear of hurting her feelings stop you from doing what you want. Fuck "what's right". Do it for you and keep it congruent.

Do all that and you'll be just fine buddy

[deleted] · 2018-10-11T16:04:33+00:00

I should have been banging other girls on the side the whole time or not agreed to monogamy under the assumption it was the only way to receive it in return.

Against general consensus around here I think in you're mid 30's and up there is a lot of benefits in a mutually exclusive LTR, but in your 20's? Nah

chachaChad · 2018-10-11T20:17:04+00:00

Have the balls to end the relationship as soon as the sex isn't good.

Corvus_Uraneus · 2018-10-11T17:39:49+00:00

I learned AWALT.

If LTR is your goal, find one whose craziness you can tolerate. I made the mistake of leaving girls because "she was crazy." What a coincidence every girl that followed was also crazy. If they're all going to be crazy, I would have been better off with the ones who were great in bed and had tolerable quirks rather than chasing the greener grass across the street.

jakethesnake5000 · 2018-10-11T19:36:19+00:00

-Don’t get married. -if you break up, don’t get back together

AnyDoughnut · 2018-10-11T18:53:33+00:00

Never move in together. The drive to bang other women doesn't go away even if your LTR has your balls drained 24/7. No matter how hot she is you will tire of having sex with her. All women snoop through your stuff. Women are persistent in their desire for commitment. And as others have stated, AWALT and don't get into an LTR

freew33zy · 2018-10-11T21:23:43+00:00

I learned that LTRs are great if you don't ever agree to not fuck other girls. If I want to be lazy and not pick up a girl for a month or two--or if I want to focus on other things and it's not necessarily laziness--then I don't have to, and I still get sex, which is helpful for your mental health and state of mind.

It also makes it so that I am almost never shit tested but am comfort tested semi-regularly. For someone who used to be pretty beta, comfort tests are super easy to pass consistently. It also keeps the relationship steadily in my frame because the underlying truth of the relationship, throughout its entire duration, will ALWAYS be that I set the terms and that the terms include me fucking other girls.

I also get the benefit of having a hot chick to introduce to people for occasions where that is warranted. Think: a job, holidays with family, etc.

Also, if a better option ever were to emerge, I have the ability to pursue it. That said, I am not totally evil, so I don't think I would necessarily pursue another girl for a relationship while with one who is so loyal to my needs. It helps she's pretty hot and my type too.

But mostly, what this relationship has shown me is that male monogamy is beta and always will be. All high SMV men (athletes, musicians, billionaires) are polygamous. Well, almost all. Know why? Their chicks know they're replaceable as fuck, and they put up with the high SMV male's behavior because they have to, because they crave him more than they crave high levels of commitment. If you play the right role for a girl, you can mimic exactly that without being as outwardly high status. And if a girl makes you be monogamous to her, I hate to break it to you but she doesn't see you as the rockstar of her world. You're replaceable to her. Girls will NOT set terms if you're not replaceable to her.

fuggetboutit · 2018-10-11T23:24:11+00:00

Always lead her, dont fall into her stupid ideas of a night out. She does what you want or you leave. Make it 80% like that.

[deleted] · 2018-10-12T09:02:21+00:00

Never move in with a girl you're not planning on marrying. Once she thinks you're her only source of intimacy, the bullshit starts. This is a golden rule I have learned.
Women don't want you to analyse and talk about their problems like a guy would.
Set boundaries and pull them up on their bad behaviour, don't keep your mouth shut for an easy life, you'll just make it harder.
Speak the truth and say what you think. Tell her which dress looks best, tell her where you're going to eat. Sounds obvious, but I was brought up to think "I don't mind, whatever you want" was the correct answer.
See your guy friends at least once a week

Whisper · 2018-10-12T10:18:05+00:00

https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/83ah8u/ltr_the_bare_minimum_you_need_to_know/

potatotiel · 2018-10-12T10:15:15+00:00

If person A will do something for person B, then person A will value the person B more than A will value B. This knowledge changed a lot for me.

bluemoviebaz · 2018-10-11T15:39:21+00:00

Don’t get in one!

TheLastMgtow · 2018-10-11T20:56:32+00:00

My lesson was: MGTAO.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GOIduTY0mHY

Title	What were your lessons learned from LTR?
Author	Auxfite
Upvotes	15
Comments	38
Date	October 11, 2018 3:22 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/9nawri/what_were_your_lessons_learned_from_ltr/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/what-were-your-lessons-learned-from-ltr.1651 https://theredarchive.com/post/1651

Comments