It's crazy!

My story is your typical story, mind you that I am 52yo. Your typical former ACF/Mr Nice guy. in my mid 20s I fake enough Alpha to score and married a beautiful woman, she was popular in HS, former cheerleader, former carousel rider. We were in love, really, the sex was great, and then we got married. And then she emasculated me and I let her, became Beta, was unhappy, then one day I finally got the courage and dumped her.

Discovered PUA, got very good at dating, scoring some very good looking women.

Then a few years later I fell in love with a beautiful young woman, I was 35, she was 24, and again we got married. And again she emasculated me, and from Alpha I revered back to Beta. I was not happy, so I had affairs to re-gain my Alpha-ness and my masculinity. Now I know that in those affairs as well, I started as Alpha and then I became Beta. You see, I am good at dealing with shit tests in the short term, but then in the long term it gets tiring to always be on the alerts, and with time I care more and more about her that it becomes easy to give in.

For the past few years I've beed very unhappy borderline depressed, and recently I have increased cheating on my wife as a way to make up for my unhappiness. Twisted, I know. What's more twisted is that I really love my wife; and I care a lot about my lovers too, but not at the oneitis point.

A couple of months ago I discovered the Red Pill, and ever since I've been reading the links on he sidebar, and a couple of books.

Wife and I have been fighting for the past year or so, often talking about divorce as a real possibility, I think we are at that point, she says she loves me too much and she wants to try work things out. Ever since the Red Pill I've been able to pinpoint the issues, how she has emasculated me throughout the years and how I let it happen, and how despite the fact that I love her I am willing to walk away if things don't change. Also for the past few years I've been working out and I look pretty good, almost ripped body.

To make a long story short, after only 2-3 months of trying TRP concepts wife and I are having a lot more sex and doing things that she didn't do before (blow jobs, swallowing, anal, sex in public places) and the kicker is that she's enjoying it very much so "Why haven't we done these things before?" she keeps saying. And the answer is that I was asking begging to try, and I was not being assertive.

But wait, it gets better. I have a new lover who is 15 year younger than me, a hot beautiful single woman who is also madly in love with me and who's happy to be my mistress on the side. And now she's organizing a FMF 3some for me because I told her that it's one of my unfulfilled fantasy (my wife won't go for that).

Life is not perfect, but it has improved significantly. Besides in my relationship, I am using my newfound RP in otehr parts of my life:

  • career: I am making some big changes there

  • friendships: I spend less time with my old friends, and I don't let my friends' wives shit-test me. Looking for some new friendship, buddies that are not too much BP

  • myself: picking up a couple of hobbies and I intend to cultivate them

I don't know what my future holds, I don't know if I am going to remain with my wife or if we'll be heading for divorce court; and while I love her, I don't care either way. I don't know how long I can spin my mistress given the fact that she's single and beautiful, and while I care deeply about her, I don't care either. I will always find plates to spin.

I know this is very cliche, and a bit controversial; but TRP works, and works great. A bit counterintuitive at the beginning, but that's what happens when you get unplugged.