TL, DR

I feel emasculated about having an attractive girl as a friend. She talks about every detail in the relationship with her boyfriend, how she cheats with other guys, and how horny it makes her feel. Me, a 20 something virgin, is starting to wonder if the friendship is symmetrical and I'm not being just her little beta bitch.

Long version:

I've been reading TRP material for about 2 months. At first it was just morbid curiosity since I thought reddit was right about this sub (women haters!) but then it changed my mentality in life. Before TRP I was a mess. A blue pilled, feminist pussy mess, all feelings over reason, love-will-conquer-everything type of hopeless loser. I'm a white middle class 6'1 average dude, not bad looking at all, with interests of my own like playing guitar, although without beard and a babyface, so even then I could clearly see why some women wouldn't go for me. But then, too many rejections later, here I was, still alone, trying everything, from being myself to shitty PUA tactics, online dating... nothing worked. The minute I was interested in a girl, it was over.

Self pity over, here I am. Trying to improve myself in every way, from working out, to eating well, reading more and more TRP... honestly, I'm so thankful to this sub for the way it improved my life. The cold truth was what I needed, it was tough but at the same time it made me feel good to be a man, to have my own interests, to have desires and act on them. Reading the material of users like Archwinger is better for me than years of therapy, I get emotional just thinking about how much this subreddit has helped me.

Anyway, my friend works as a personal trainer in the gym I go to. In the beginning she was so out of my league I talked to her just to prove to myself I could talk to a beautiful girl. Now we (me, another friend and her) go out almost every afternoon after her work just to walk around the area, go to coffee places, smoke, go to bars, and just talk about life. It's been like this for months, I know I don't have feelings for her, we're honest with each other, joke often about sexual things (think: "oh, wouldn't mind doing that to you haha"), touch each another in a friends type of way, but at the end of the day we just end up talking about other people, how I don't have any luck with women, how she has no real friends other than us, etc.

From time to time, she becomes interested in some guy and cheats on her boyfriend (without actually having sex to those men, in my mind it even makes it worse) and she talks how she feels about it, the texts and message the others guys send her... we joke around about it (I found myself saying TRP things to her with less direct words..) and I try my best to handle the situation from a place of comfort, but what I feel in those moments is awful. Right now she's sending messages while in the club, dancing with some guy and wondering if he likes her. In these moments, I feel like shit. This would be the perfect cliche of the friendzone if I had feelings for her, but I don't. I just care about her as a friend. But with my situation, I just look at myself from the point of view of TRP and can see the disapproving eyes.

I don't seem me cutting the relationship or anything, but what would you do? Maybe talk about how I don't like her sharing all those details? Give some time for her to understand it's not okay?