Do all women fall into the category of hypergamous?

Goldfulgore · 2014-11-05T14:53:02+00:00

All women feel the desire to be hypergamous, to some extent. Honestly, so do all men. Can you tell me you've never been in a relationship, saw a girl who was way hotter than your girlfriend and felt some form of desire towards her?

Same thing with women. The only difference is a man's value is based on more than his looks.

You can hope to find a women who won't ACT on this desire. I think you'd be hard pressed to find one who doesn't HAVE it.

ohhaio · 2014-11-05T15:13:09+00:00

I really want to just chill and lay back and enjoy my life

This is a dangerous fantasy.

Don't kid yourself my friend, life has a way of always forcing you to be on your toes.

If you allow yourself to have this fantasy that "someday this will all be over and I can relax" then you are setting yourself up for disappointment when someday never comes.

And if you decide to just bail out on life anyway, do the slacker thing "because I've worked hard and I deserve a break" then don't be surprised when the rest of humanity reacts to you as a slacker, not as the man you used to be.

GenericallyEpic · 2014-11-05T14:50:11+00:00

All FEMALES do this, including animals.

vandaalen · 2014-11-05T15:34:06+00:00

Are there no self-respecting women that I can build a future with, without having to constantly focus on improving myself, because after 30-40 I really want to just chill and lay back and enjoy my life with a woman

You are a man. There is no place to rest and lay your head unless you are willing to settle below your standards.

I am 38 and nothings going to stop myself from wanting to improve myself. The day I will want to stop is the day I will close my eyes forever.

What do you want to with the second half of your life? Become fat and lazy, while you watch your wife do the same? I don't think you've thought this through. This will be the prime of your life and you are right now starting to think about how you will be able to just waste it, so you can "finally" become comfortable?

All this purple pill shit posted here up to now makes me sick. There is no exception to AWALT. Literally none. There are only nuances.

It's not about your woman walking away for any better man. There will always be a better man than you. Bigger, stronger, richer, more beautiful, more intelligent, more intelectual, smoother, more successful, you name it.

The point is that it's about what she feels about you, him and if she might be able to pin him down and if her life would improve by this. This involves many factors, with the ones related solely to the guy aren't necessarily the most important to her. She might get the tingles, but that doesn't mean that her getting fucked by him (or even running away) is inevitable.

If you've got a family and a healthy (read "red pill") relationship with her, where you are the captain, she's the mate and you are not on the path of decline she will not hop on Bully McAlpha's dick and risk everything she's got up to now unless she feels that she will do much better with him.

The most important thing for you is your selection criteria when looking for a woman to spend the rest of your life with. We don't preach looking for red flags, like slutting around for instance, for nothing.

If you select her carefully chances will significantly drop that she will find anybody who she feels is "better" and will level up. Well, unless you choose to become a pathetic lazy piece of meat who is done with his life.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aAfOcUX7zKY#t=89

tepper2 · 2014-11-05T15:02:35+00:00

The reason AWALT is so prevalent isn't because AWA literally LT, but because hypergamy manifests itself often in women you'd otherwise never suspect of it.

The fact that many of us consistently see "good" women branch swing causes us to stick with "AWALT" because it's more likely than not. While there may be a diamond in the rough occasionally, they are few and far between.

TRP isn't about finding the the one girl who isn't going to swing when she gets the opportunity, it's about dealing with the fact that whatever woman you're with will someday, at some point, be prone to it, unless you control the situation by being the highest value man you can possibly be.

Are there no self-respecting women

It's not about self respect. It's about entitlement, hypergamy, and hypoagency, and none of those things are problematic to a modern woman. They want want they want, they deserve it, and who the fuck are we to tell them otherwise?

I really want to just chill and lay back and enjoy my life with a woman, but if she s just going to leave me for the next better man who is still on his grind then what was the point of being with her for so long?

It's an unfortunate reality, but a reality nonetheless. You either MGTOW, remain single and play the game until you drop dead, or deal with TRP realities in a LTR, knowing that she'll likely be on her way out as soon as you start to slip.

1NV0K3R · 2014-11-05T14:48:44+00:00

The common flaw many people have when first realizing TRP is that they believe it deals in absolutes.

Nothing is ever absolute.

While we preach AWALT etc etc, this is simply the MAJORITY. I have had many relationships in my lifetime, all prior to TRP and I can say without a doubt, in my experience, all were branch swings.

There are women out there with more traditional values, that have no want or need to ride the CC, and are perfect for captain first mate dynamic. TRP isn't about SEARCHING for this.

TRP isn't about "chilling back and enjoying life with a woman". TRP is about focusing your innate energy and making life the best it can be FOR YOURSELF. If you follow TRP to the core, life will automatically be you constantly focusing and improving yourself innately and a quality woman will see this and follow.

sigmared82 · 2014-11-05T15:20:28+00:00

TRP talks in terms of generalizations because they're useful as a default set of assumptions. The point of AWALT is that AWA(potentially)LT. In other words, all women have the instinctual drive of hypergamy, AF/BB, branch swinging, shit testing, etc, etc. Some women were raised with a social/moral conditioning to suppress or channel those drives in a positive way. But even the sweetest, most loyal and loving woman will be tempted to branch swing if you fuck up bad enough in the relationship. And if you haven't accepted AWALT, you'll be completely caught off guard when it happens.

As Rollo Tomassi says here:

Like it or not generalizations are useful and we use them all the time to see the forest for the trees. It’s not isolated abnormalities in a system that we use to describe the circumstances of that system, it’s the whole. We study majorities to assess overall condition, not isolations. That’s the scientific definition of generalities, but when they refer to things that are close to us we tend to put ourselves into the generalization and cop the “not-in-my-case” menality. We’d like to think that our experiences are unique and special (and they are, to us), but in the generality we’re simply statistics. So the word ‘Generalize’ gets a negative connotation and the person using it is vilified, because it’s an afront to our “special” conditions.

favours_of_the_moon · 2014-11-05T15:52:47+00:00

Yes, all women are like that. We call this AWALT.

A bitch will always say, "Not all women are like that." That's NAWALT. But let's say that's true. Are you going to conduct yourself betting on your girl being the .00001%? Good luck with that.

elevul · 2014-11-05T16:12:23+00:00

No, that's their nature, but some of them are capable of keeping it under control, rather than bring swayed by it. They're very rare, which is why they are called Unicorns.

through_a_ways · 2014-11-05T16:34:33+00:00

because after 30-40 I really want to just chill and lay back and enjoy my life with a woman

Well if she's older than 40 too, you probably don't have much to worry about.

winndixie · 2014-11-05T16:53:02+00:00

Learning RP here too.

Just cause a woman is hypergamous doesn't mean she's not self-respecting. Rather it's a woman's nature and is VERY self-respecting: she respects herself to think she can do better.

Find a woman who too lazy to find and work towards another relationship. I know a girl like this. She doesn't want to risk losing this one that is stable even though she sees better options on a daily. Also, her perceived SMV of herself must be lower than the man's perceived SMV.

R4F1 · 2014-11-06T00:11:26+00:00

All woman are hypergamous by nature. Its part of their evolutionary DNA. Now the real questions are 1) How hypergamous is she? and 2) Is she actively hypergamous or not? For some women, they are past the hypergamy stage, and that is because their man already satisfies her wants. You do that by abiding by TRP/alpha tendencies. However, less and less women are this way. Chances are, she isn't cheating on you with someone else, simply because no one else has tried to allure her away from you.

abcd_z · 2014-11-06T04:25:37+00:00

because after 30-40 I really want to just chill and lay back and enjoy my life with a woman

The shit tests never end. What you're describing is called a Disney Fantasy^TM.

oldredder · 2014-11-06T06:05:42+00:00

Hypergamy is not a category. It's a normal female behaviour.

And no, there's no such thing as a woman who can't find a man better than you, and if she finds him she'll leave you for him.

A man with a woman long-term can never ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever relax & be chill ever. That's not what it is. If you want that you need to be single for life & just pick up girls for limited times of sex & perhaps companionship.

There is not point to being with a woman so long at all if you actually want trust, stability or peace. That's not what they bring. Ever.

LeggyBlueEyes · 2014-11-06T16:17:56+00:00

Don't ever stop trying/growing/bettering yourself. You are doing it for yourself, not for her.

And even if she's not really hypergamous (I wasn't in my most recent relationship) I will say that his complacency (likely due to underlying mental health issues) led to a rift that we could not explain. Until TRP I didn't understand why it bothered me when he got angry over trivial things, unreliable, etc. I was always told that I expected too much. All I expected was an equivalent to what I was putting in.

My point is, you'll get what you give. So if you give up and live on easy mode, so will she. But hers may look a lot different than yours.

exbp · 2014-11-05T17:37:46+00:00

I've come to think of it like this: a woman's "loyalty" is not based on past events, it's based on what she sees the future events will be.

She wants to fuck the cute waiter with the bulging muscles but she won't. Not because of all the great things you've done, but because you'll be better for her needs down the road. The instant that other guy looks like he'll provide more of what she needs next week/month/year, she'll be packing up her shit.

Title	Do all women fall into the category of hypergamous?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	5
Comments	25
Date	November 5, 2014 2:35 PM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/2ldaos/do_all_women_fall_into_the_category_of_hypergamous/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/do-all-women-fall-into-the-category-of-hypergamous.193528 https://theredarchive.com/post/193528

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