Hit in the face by entitled princess - How to react?

mrust · 2013-08-31T19:17:32+00:00

Chances are something happened while you weren't paying attention and she blamed you. Maybe someone grabbed her ass, whatever.

Only thing I can think of is to step back and say "Why EXACTLY did you do that?" It may interrupt her pattern and force her to explain herself. If that doesn't work, your only option is to walk away. There is zero benefit to continuing the interaction.

Savat · Sun Sep 1 4:36:07 2013 UTC

My advice? Get Lasik. You won't have to worry about your glasses when you throw down.

A4m1n · 2013-08-31T16:04:57+00:00

I guess I don't have a lot more to add than anyone else here. Keeping you cool and smiling is definitely paramount in any fight. Fight a man with a smile on your face, it fucks with him something hard.

Had a situation where I was teasing a woman and she went to slap me... just out of pure luck I managed to catch her arm before she made contact and spun her so her back was to me. I made the "tsk, tsk" sound in her ear then walked away. Didn't see her the rest of the night.

[deleted] · 2013-09-03T20:49:11+00:00

Remember, when a dog bites you, its the owner's fault.

The first time you restrained her hand you should have addressed the problem to the BF as if the girl was a child or simple. If its clear that he is losing respect and social standing because of her actions, he'll stop it.

Other then that, peace out and walk. You will always lose more than you gain by retaliating or continuing the confrontation against a female.

Necromaze · 2013-08-31T07:21:31+00:00

I would have remained calm and made it perfectly clear to the "boyfriend" that he needs to keep his woman under control, when you had her restrained the first time. Let her know through telling him what the consequences of her hitting you again will be and don't address her directly (as if you were talking to a naughty child's mother about their behaviour).

Then I would have asked the bouncers to remove her and found another target. When it comes to hitting, people get one free shot as far as I'm concerned and then it's time to get rid of them one way or another.

ML00211 · 2013-09-03T08:39:03+00:00

Hindsight is 20/20, but self-defense is only ok when it is sudden and unexpected. Next time, hit back and claim it was instinctive. For good measure, throw the drink first.

The more in-control you appear the harder you will be punished.

Pushnikov · 2013-08-31T09:27:56+00:00

Had a not too dissimilar situation with a long term FWB in the street. I've been meaning to write up about this to get some feedback, so lets see what you think.

This was pretty random, something got under her skin during a discussion that was absolutely non-confrontational (quasi-religious discussion that had just started, not even a heated debate.)

I'm comfortably in her physical space touching her when she punches me about as hard as she can. (Not slaps, straight up punches me) She works out, but she's a lightweight and it basically deflects off my jaw. I grab her offending hand and stare her down. I think she yells something in my face, and then clocks me with her left hand. So, I restrain that.

At that point I was pretty infuriated, but hadn't yelled or even said anything. Pure stare down. First instinct was to hit back. If she had just slapped me, I wouldn't have had that instinct, but she was straight on punching me. In my book that's asking for some retaliation. But:

A) I really care about this person

B) I would've hurt her seriously. I'm not a lightweight.

C) A guy harming a girl in any situation, no matter how wrong the girl is, means you're going to be classed as the aggressor by default. Yay for feminist equality /sarcasm.

I roll through my options. And decide that the punches did almost no damage to me so I'm going to goad her into punching me more to make it obvious how pathetic it is to punch me.

I let go both of her hands and step back like 2 feet, and raise my voice, "Seriously? Punch me again."

And, to her credit, she fucking cracks me with her right fist to my jaw. Doesn't even sting. Some random hipsters from across the street decide that they want to save the day and step into the situation. Beta Knight hipster steps in first and says, "Guys, don't need to do this!", and then the Feminist chubby girl hipster steps in and says, "Alright, I'm pretty sure I saw her hit you, but," turning to the girl "are you ok?".

My friend nods and starts insisting she wants some stupid water bottle from the inside of my car that we were leaning against so she can "walk home". She lives outside of easily walkable distance, and it's late at night. So, I don't trust this. First, I really don't want her walking home alone, and I'm not going to turn this into me chasing her down. If it comes to that, she can get her ass home on her own.

I refuse to let her into my car for the water bottle. But, the hipsters are interfering pretty hard with my attempt to control the situation. She's already acting ridiculous and I'm not going to risk her doing anything stupid while in my car. I just refuse and walk away for a couple minutes because these hipsters think they can tell me what to do. I really don't want to pick a fight with them to back off (protective instincts would've just forced them to escalate), and I'm really working on focusing my attention on my friend. They're a non-entity to me, a distraction.

My friend walks away in my direction and I walk up to her - glad to have ditched the hipster police - and I give her some shit and I tell her she better calm her shit down if she wants a ride home. She's expecting I'm naturally going to drive her home now without any debate. I make her relent that she fucked up. We get in the car, we drive a couple minutes as we discuss why it happened and she suddenly insists that I wasn't "listening to her!!" and starts yelling this at the top of her lungs. I pull over. "Stop screaming or get out." We do this a few times until she realizes I'm dead serious. She shuts up and I proceed to drive her back home.

Quick background. I've known this girl for 7 years. We dated seriously for a while then I broke it off. We continued with a FWB situation for the last couple years. We've had our fair share of arguments, but she's always down for listening and realizing where she went wrong. If she didn't, I wouldn't keep her around. I've seen her get pretty emotionally distant when it comes to our conflicting personal beliefs. So, I try to avoid it ~ It came up randomly in that discussion and I was trying to avoid talking about it, and even told her she was going to get offended and didn't want to answer her question. She insisted it would be fine. That's when she punches me after I answer. facepalm

SO, the next day she calls me early and says that she feels horrible and had a really bad rut the last couple days and she doesn't know why she took it out on me. I tease her about punching me regularly now. Pretty much implying how it didn't even phase me. She even said to me, "I wish you did punch me to snap me out of it." Which made me laugh with a response of, "ya, well, you don't want me punching you. You'd be hurt pretty bad." Girls don't really realize how strong average men can be. I guess that's why they need the "visual" confirmation of big muscles.

It wasn't a total stranger, but it was random. In the end, insisting that she punch me again actually worked in my favor because it made it obvious to anyone looking (hipsters) that I wasn't the aggressor. I had stepped away from her and released her. I wasn't able to continue to play out the situation to conclusion the way I wanted because of the "intervention". Basic idea would've been to mock her into submission though.

crankypants15 · 2013-09-03T14:23:45+00:00

Her boyfriend got involved and pushed me away saying that it doesn't matter that she hit me because she is a girl.

Call the police. It matters to them. Call the police and let them handle if, while you have evidence of assault, like a red mark on your face. This won't stop unless the police get involved with her. You are likely not the first person she's hit.

Explanation: In my state the guy is MUCH more likely to go to jail for defending himself, than the woman. That's why I just let the police handle it.

Veritisia · 2013-08-31T03:49:27+00:00

You should have given her a shit eating grin and restrained her. It was a composure shit test and you failed. Turn into a "predator" and people can sense it. Say something like, you shouldn't do that, it turns me on. Escalate, escalate, escalate. Agree and amplify, and you will pass the test by turning her on. By getting upset you essentially proved yourself liable to provocation from lesser males, and if she slapped you in front of her "boyfriend" it also proves he is not longterm relationship material. No self respecting man would associate himself with a skank.

By getting upset at her you give her plausible deniability as to the fact that she was being a skank. You got mad, now she's the victim.

yoursisterlovedick · 2013-08-31T21:18:11+00:00

I have rules for violence against women.

If it's private and she loves you, just knock her out. I've done that. A girl slapped me and I slapped her back, too strong, so she got knocked out, gashed her lip. She told her friends that she was drunk and walked into a door.

If it's public, I prefer to playfully slap her on the back of her head and say something along the lines, "don't hit me, you never know when you meet a psychopath."

Title	Hit in the face by entitled princess - How to react?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	17
Comments	16
Date	August 31, 2013 3:23 AM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/1lfyc5/hit_in_the_face_by_entitled_princess_how_to_react/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/hit-in-the-face-by-entitled-princess-how-to-react.196512 https://theredarchive.com/post/196512

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