Shit tests keep failing

angels_fan · 2015-10-17T14:25:05+00:00

Okay... So what did take you so long to get home? Why did you feel a need to aa this?

jcrpta · 2015-10-17T19:43:08+00:00

There's lots of ways to answer shit tests.

If you rely too heavily on any one way, it will lose effectiveness. There's an "Idiot's guide to Shit Tests" on the main RP sidebar:

https://www.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/22qnmk/newbies_read_this_the_definitive_guide_to_shit/

HAVING SAID THAT:

Read WISNIFG. It's chock-full of techniques you can use to deal with argumentative, manipulative people.
You didn't A&A sufficiently. The whole point is you agree first:

"You're right, dear, I did take a long time to get home".

Now you amplify to absurdity. Absolute, completely crazy, I'm-full-of-shit-and-I-know-it absurdity.

"I was practising tantric sex with my girlfriend. Did you know you have to slow down every time you're about to cum? I had to hold back for over an hour, by the time I finished I wallpaper-pasted her to the ceiling. I probably ought to go back to help her clean up".

RPSigmaStigma · 2015-10-17T12:23:29+00:00

Post this in /r/askMRP and fill in some more details. How's the sex? Frequent? Enthusiastic? Starfish? Monthly duty sex? Also, is she on any hormonal birth control? If not, what's her attitude toward you while she's ovulating (about 2 weeks in to her cycle)?

strategos_autokrator · 2015-10-17T15:17:42+00:00

Have you read WISNIFG from the sidebar?

It seems like you haven't. You don't have to explain yourself to anyone. You are a man.

The_Litz · 2015-10-18T18:48:03+00:00

Her: Where were you? You: Exactly where you think I was.

Kiss on the head and then tell her about your day.

A few weeks ago you were giving excuses and and field reports when you were late from work. You cannot realistically expect to shut that down over night. Your frame must be unyielding to carry off the 'banging my gfriend' type of replies. Build frame and then AA.

The good news is that she takes note when you are late, propably the hamster spinning unless she has always been like that.

UEMcGill · 2015-10-19T14:26:40+00:00

Her: So what took you so long to get home? Me: Just visiting one of my girl friends. Her: I don't like that, where were you? Me: Don't worry you are my favorite. Her: Stop. Answer me.

If this is word for word, two things stick out to me from this conversation. One, she's combative. Two, she clearly think you are in her frame (you are).

I had a big script written out about how I would deal with this but I think what you really need to learn is outcome independence. You're trying to blow up her shit tests, but in reality you just don't want her mad. Fuck her if she's mad. Who cares. After she said "I don't like that..." I would have walked out of the room. Ignore. Full stop. The first statement was a shit test, everything after is just harpy. Don't play the game.

Now for the long run give her an operational framework. "Hey as part of my job I need to work late. So if you don't hear from me between work and post work plus an hour, then assume I'm working late. If it goes later than that, I'll text you so you don't worry." My wife has a constant myriad of things going on, and as First Officer she deserves communication from me for logistical reasons, when's dinner, when's the gym, etc.

bogeyd6 · 2015-10-19T15:05:52+00:00

My wife does this alot too. While I put a moratorium on writing field reports. I got this just last thursday and a huge comfort test ensued which I passed with flying colors. You know what caused her to break psychotic and literally crumble onto the floor into tears? When I wouldnt tell her if it was my long or short work out tonight.

IMHO, you are going about this the right way. Work in walking away too as you answer. That way you no longer stay that captive audience. Builds mystery, and bitches love mystery.

BluepillProfessor · 2015-10-17T18:16:59+00:00

I don't think asking where you have been is a shit test. Is it disrespectful or rude?l

dandar4600 · 2015-10-17T12:42:24+00:00

Where were you is not a shit test. There is a good primer on shit tests on TRP main sub. Search and read up on them.

Sepean · 2015-10-19T07:52:43+00:00

There's plenty of good commentary on what is shit tests and how to pass them properly and the right way to play dread, so I'm not going to touch on that.

Her: So what took you so long to get home? Me: Just visiting one of my girl friends. Her: I don't like that, where were you? Me: Don't worry you are my favorite. Her: Stop. Answer me.

So, can she fuck up your frame by just repeating the shit test? What you should do here is just play amused mastery and STFU. Just smirk, maybe kiss her on the forehead and go do what you want to do.

It will take time for her to see your frame as strong. Her shit tests aren't going to be fair until then. She's a girl, she throws nasty verbal curve balls at you and that is just how it is. There's not always going to be a response that leaves her happy; it is part of the test to see if you can handle her getting angry over your answer. Even for us experienced guys shit tests can't always be passed in a way that leaves her happy.

Don't be afraid of her getting angry or sad. Making her experience emotions is a good thing. Passing a test can look like her stomping off angrily but an hour later she has your dick in her mouth.

stonepimpletilists · 2015-10-17T13:18:33+00:00

If you're shits together, answer can be simple.

... End of discussion

RBuddDwyer · 2015-10-20T00:50:50+00:00

I'm just going to lob this one out there. How is her tone and demeanor? Is she just persistent, or is it sharp and accusatory, almost like there is a hint of anger? If the latter, you might want to look into Borderline Personality Disorder. That is how my wife first manifested it to me. The quick, sharp, out of proportion replies to my A&A / Amused Mastery replies to her shit tests. The first indicators were her constant demand for what she deemed to be an acceptable answer (regardless of whether I answered seriously or swatted it back), and the "feel" (for lack of a better word) of her questions. She just had a biting tone with a distinct air of seriousness behind it. I could almost see the cauldron of emotions stewing behind her eyes.

Just look into it. If you decide she may have BPD, then May God have Mercy on your Soul.

Title	Shit tests keep failing
Author	Alphabeta40
Upvotes	1
Comments	20
Date	October 17, 2015 12:02 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MarriedRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/3p3qow/shit_tests_keep_failing/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MarriedRedPill/shit-tests-keep-failing.200847 https://theredarchive.com/post/200847

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