I am still on the path of need improvement when it comes to MRP. Probably the biggest thing I will admit is I let things get me down that I shouldn't.

Being 43, even before I found RP, I would turn the wife down once in a while if I knew I was going to get some lackluster duty sex. Today, it's a little different.

We have sex at least 2 times a week, this week it was 3. I saw another recent poster talk about his wife being in control. My wife is an engineer, and I know sex can be anxious for her. But I have babied this for her for years. I mentioned in another thread that sometimes I feel like I shouldn't complain because I get BJ's. Saying all this, I should throw in that I am working on getting my SMV back to where it used to be by lifting. I am pretty damn fit, but lifting gives me an alpha edge...

So my example -- Had a great dinner with a lot of laughing. Got home to watch a movie. She was getting tired so we tried to watch Spartacus on Netflix. It was a little cheesy so I turned it off (she was also a little drunk). She was glad I turned it off because she was tired. However, she then started browsing for more on her iPad.

I told her she was tired and insinuated it's time to get this show on the road. She agreed, but kept doing it. I finally said if she didn't put it down, she could watch a show and I am going in the other room. She got a little pissy, and then got naked. I reminded her about putting something sexy on...she said "ok" in a matter of fact way.

The vibe sucked. It was mechanical but she was getting turned on. She finally just wanted to get fucked (and yes, I pound her all the time). I wanted some variety so I wasn't ready yet. The she snapped and said, "yeah, but you know I like it when we cum at the same time, so why are you doing this." I just grabbed her and pounded her. It sucked.

I went in stoic mode. She then asked in a whiney voice, "was it ok I said that"? I said in a non-emotional tone, "Does it matter?" She said it did but we both were too tired and I didn't care at that point and we crashed.

This morning...she acts like nothing happened.

As I am getting more and more RP, I am losing attraction for the wife. I know some of my acts here weren't RP, but I am trying to figure this out...

UPDATE 1: She told me yesterday that she doesn't remember much of Saturday night and apologized if she did anything bitchy

UPDATE 2: I really don't get rejected often. I can pound her just about whenever I want, and the fact that a blowjob is her arousal trigger, I get those often alot too. She actually doesn't let me go down on her often. Ever since I became less needy about sex, I just haven't been attracted to her enough to want to pound her. Trying to get her to try new things can be exhausting. The last thing that seemed to work was laying off sex and when she asks, telling her in an unemotional and confident tone, "With you attitude and lack of engagement, masturbation seems more fun." However, you guys are telling me that this isn't the way to go. So maybe it worked one time but doesn't set up long-term frame?

I have no problems being more assertive and just showing by action and taking her. The problem is that it is getting old. Maybe that makes me less alpha...I don't know.

My SMV is higher than hers but it has definitely gone slack. I rejoined a gym and I will pack it back on. So I have at least some focus on myself to do over the next few months.