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New BIL slapped my wife's ass as a 'joke' - am I handling this right?

Reddit View
August 4, 2018

Tldr: BIL touched my wife as a joke. Got a plan to deal with this decisively if he moves a finger again, but I'd like your input.

SIL (49) comes over to visit her little sister (36, my wife).

Right behind SIL is her trusty man-poodle, the new BIL. She divorced old BIL a year ago. Replaced him with new BIL about three months ago.

Seen the guy four times, every time walking behind her, eager to please and obey her every command.

My wife greets them in our garden and makes small talk. I was getting my sons ready to go because I'm teaching them to ride a bicycle. On my way out besieged with my excited kids asking me a million questions, I hear my wife in the garden blurt out: "Excuse me? What do you think you're doing?". In a tone that makes the room temperature go down enough to make ice picks.

I notice the tone and then I hear SIL laughing. They're just joking around - I conclude

After getting back she tells me what really happened.

Standing in the garden, out of nowhere, she feels a slap on her ass. She turns around, thinking it's me, and sees BIL standing there grinning. What I heard while leaving was my wife's response to that. . SIL laughed it off and the man-poodle said: "What? I thought you were into alpha males?". My wife told him that he has the wrong idea and removed herself from the situation. They left soon after.

I was surprised (to say the least) because I would have never believed the man-poodle to have the guts. I assume this was his really awkward, lame and borderline retarded way to make a joke and it backfired.

I told my wife to immediately let me know if anything remotely like this happens again with new BIL. She agreed, paused and then asked what I would do if this happened again.

I told her that I would see to it that he got the fuck out of my house and that I would give him a hand if he didn't comply immediately.

I reasoned that there could be two things going on:

1 - New BIL is fucking autistic and/or socially retarded and tries to be funny. Shit blows up in his face when my wife made it clear that she wasn't having any of it.

If this is correct, this behavior likely won't happen again.

2 - New BIL is not the meek poodle he seems to be and has more predator in him than I thought. This would imply that he waited until I was out the door and made his move.

If this is correct, this behavior likely will happen again very soon I can deal with it swiftly and decisively without second guessing.

I told my wife what to do without doubt or hesitation. Had to make a decision in a split second. Got an incredible blowjob that night, so she's showing her appreciation... but I wonder how you guys look at it?

Post Information
Title New BIL slapped my wife's ass as a 'joke' - am I handling this right?
Author reformingbluepill
Upvotes 18
Comments 53
Date 04 August 2018 09:48 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit askMRP
Original Link
Similar Posts

Red Pill terms found in post:

[–][deleted] 41 points42 points  (20 children) | Copy

Your wife handled herself well. Leave it at that. Anything you say to BIL is wasted effort. The right person, your wife, handled the situation well. Reward good behavior.

[–]UEMcGillI am become McGill, Destroyer of Blue Pill11 points12 points  (1 child) | Copy

More importantly, if you handle your business, ie hit the gym your wife will have the confidence to know that she can stick up for herself because if shit gets out of hand she can call on you to be all Silverback gorilla and end some shit.

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yep. Little girls f-e-e-l they can get mouthy when they're with their Silverback for protection.

In other news, every day that goes by, I swear my wife acts more like a 15 year old tomboy. No matter how old, they're all just little girls.

[–]Rian_StoneMod / Red Beret8 points9 points  (1 child) | Copy

Was going to say. What more is required here?

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Drawing lines in the sand, only proves powerlessness, proves he's concerned about it.

[–]helaughsinhidden2 points3 points  (14 children) | Copy

Agree. Don't mate guard, etc. Hopefully he keeps it up and you keep getting blowjob, lol. Risk v reward.

[–]friendandadvisor7 points8 points  (11 children) | Copy

Agree. Don't mate guard, etc.

His wife was sexually groped. Whipping the BIL's ass is not mate guarding.

[–]helaughsinhidden2 points3 points  (4 children) | Copy

His wife was sexually groped

White knighting SJW?

Whipping the BIL's ass

Now you are a bad ass now with bail and lawyer money, and a free week to spend in jail?

Are you both Daniel and Johnny from Karate Kid?

[–]friendandadvisor1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

OK, I suppose that if I came over to your house and slapped your wife's ass, you'd just laugh it off and say 'abundance', amirite?

Speaking of lawyers and cops, would you slap a stranger's wife on the front of a cop?? What do you think the end story would be? The officer coming over, slapping you on the back as a fellow alpha, and the woman saying 'boys will be boys'?

Now, you are a bad ass now with bail and lawyer money, and ...Karate Kid?"

LOL, you need to read more than the sidebar. I'm not going to spend too much more time educating you , because I doubt it will help, but, I have to try to correct ignorance, regardless. Thought project: Do you think that a cop would favor me or a guy that slaps my wife's ass, should said cop be called to the scene?

[–]helaughsinhidden4 points5 points  (2 children) | Copy

You talk like a woman.

For the record, I have punched people for doing this kind of stuff. It was weak. I went to jail. She cheated on me a month later anyway. Very dumb move. Maybe you don't say abundance, but you don't completely lose frame over this.

Edit: look friendandadvisor, you've posted good stuff before, but keep the #me2movement for a different sub.

[–]friendandadvisor4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Edit: look friendandadvisor, you've posted good stuff before, but keep the #me2movement for a different sub.

Thanks for the kind words, but, really...just because I think a man needs rebuke for ass slapping another man's think that that calls for the #me2movement label?

That's low. You have taken back the kind words and dishonored me.

[–]Rian_StoneMod / Red Beret0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Actually walking through the consequences of your actions before acting.


[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy

Whipping the BIL's ass is not mate guarding.

No, but it sure could be a stupid move. If I was the BIL, beneath my calm exterior, I hand him his ass. His mate guarding is just setting me up for his wife for another day....YMMV

[–]friendandadvisor2 points3 points  (4 children) | Copy

And, your being a bitch and letting him slap your wife's ass with impunity is just setting him up for your wife for another day...ymmv.

Wife was, rightly, shocked and incensed at getting her ass slapped. That's why she screamed what she did. Her saying what she did wasn't a shit test, and his response to it showed what a bitch that he thought the husband was.

The BIL was doing the dog trick of marking his territory: 1. Slapping wife's ass, and 2. Making the comment that he did, implying that he was alpha, and a challenge.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (3 children) | Copy

The BIL was doing the dog trick of marking his territory: 1. Slapping wife's ass, and 2. Making the comment that he did, implying that he was alpha, and a challenge.

Yes, nothing new. The wife shut it down like a champ, so our hero can nod approval to her, move on like a man unbothered by other men finding his wife attractive. Cool and confident of his position as her man, not guarding his woman like a barking little dog.

[–]friendandadvisor1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

Nope. BIL hitting on her and husband nodding approval is unbothered.

BIL slapping her ass and husband nodding is a bitch.

Listen, if you think something that makes your wife respond as OPs did is only worth an approving nod for her response, I can't help you.


[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

I am certain that you can't help me.

[–]weakandsensitive0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

lol. like it.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy

Even worse, paying attention to a faggot that his wife already busted his balls. Proves he doesn't have it together, proves weakness not strength.

When I smack another man's wife's ass, and she makes it plain she ain't playing, it's over. Having her dad-bod come over and lecture me, proves he's a faggot that's worried about it. Basically says, she might be up for it another time, since he's such a chump.

[–]reformingbluepill5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

When I smack another man's wife's ass, and she makes it plain she ain't playing, it's over

100% correct. Anything I try add to that is just needy chest puffing signaling insecurity.

[–]reformingbluepill2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

I will.

[–]Rian_StoneMod / Red Beret7 points8 points  (3 children) | Copy

Loving the underlying assumption here with op and his wife.

honey, give me a reason to show you my masculinity, then adore me for it. I care not for the social ramifications of bearing my brother in laws ass, because you Will love me

Its a covert contract. She handled, it's not an issue, but op and his care of chest beaters are more than happy to fantasize about their masculine fantasies.

How about, if you were a real man you'd have never let her put of your sight, so she wouldn't have to fend for herself without you to save her cock sucking lips the energy they need later on.

See how stupid it all sounds? Stop trying to convince everyone you're a man. It's a poor surrogate for actually being one

[–]reformingbluepill2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

Read your comment and it pissed me off.

Usually, when something pisses me off, it's either completely retarded or there's a lot more truth to it than I care to admit.

After some reflection I realized your remark about the underlying assumption is spot on. Thanks for the insight, it's crazy how much a page of text reveals about my reasoning / frame of mind.

[–]Rian_StoneMod / Red Beret4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

You'd be surprised how similar guys are.

  1. Be attractive

  2. Don't be unattractive.

Thats really all there is to it, the rest is details.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

What a load of bullshit. It shows your gynocentric frame, how are you even a mod? This situation amounts to a complete stranger sexually assaulting his wife while implying her husband is a beta faggot while having her sister watching and laughing it off.

This is fucked up and abnormal behavior and not about the wife at all.

[–]Grimsterr6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

She handled it just fine, no need, yet, to get involved beyond a "you handled that chucklefuck like a pro, good job" to the Mrs.

[–]RedPillCoach6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

Got incredible blowjob.

I don't even have to read these anymore. Stories the same. Be a man. Gets blown.

[–]robertwservice19746 points7 points  (5 children) | Copy

I would warn him in no uncertain terms to keep his hands off her. And do it in person, so he knows you are serious.

Otherwise, his next “joke” may occur at an inconvenient time, like a family get together. If he’s a social retard, this should be enough. If he’s a predator, well ... you warned him.

[–]Rian_StoneMod / Red Beret8 points9 points  (1 child) | Copy

I wouldnt do this. This chest puffing is so obviously insucure as a gesture...

[–]robertwservice19745 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

I have given this some thought, and I was wrong. There is a strong element of convincing myself I'm a man in my comment, with inherent chest puffing.

OP's wife already set the boundary. Piling on with "her boundary is my boundary too" would be weak. Like the wimpy kid who stands over the bully and says, "yeah, don't ever take my lunch money again," after the wimp's buddy just kicked the bully's ass and got the wimp's lunch money back.

My insecurities about my own boundary setting showed through in my comment. I now realize I've been tilting at windmills, looking for opportunities to set boundaries where none are needed.

[–]reformingbluepill0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Whatever happens - I'll make 100% sure it will be communicated in person, face to face.

Being tough online or through text message is easy. Have experienced in personal and professional life that when I confront people that talked big online or via text became docile as puppies in a face to face meeting.

[–]friendandadvisor1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

However, you can also take a lesson from the Apostle Paul.

He said, to the Corinthians, I believe, that he is tough with them in letters so that he doesn't have to be tough in person.

The 'keyboard toughguys' (I think somebody on this thread is just dying to use this term) may be capable of being tough in person, but, seek a better way.

[–]robertwservice19741 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yeah, and lawyers have a name for those types of written communication: “evidence.”

[–]FeralRed7 points8 points  (2 children) | Copy

She's 36. She has been fending off unwanted male attention since she hit puberty. I'd actually be concerned she was a landwhalepigface if she hadn't developed a well calibrated - "put Steve back in his place" skillset.

Don't mate guard. It's her job to say no to unwanted advances. Don't be a whiteknight, she doesn't need rescuing, all you're doing is looking insecure.

Other guys are annoying insects to her. And you. Or, they should be if you're doing your job.

Until she asks you to intervene.

Here's an anecdote...

Years ago I took a FWB to a lifestyle takeover of Hedonism in Jamaica. Every guest there was a "swinger" from all over the US. Nude 24/7 (sunburned balls are no joke!), instasex everywhere.

I'd been fucking Jen on the side for about 8 months, my wife was mired in work. So I took Jen on a sex vacation.

Jen is a compact little marathoner brunette with fantastic pierced nipples. We were hanging by the pool, nude. A german couple were close by, admiring Jen's nipple jewelry. My next trip to the bar I got them drink refills as a way of introduction, I walked up with hands full and said hi. Since my hands were full the wife reached out and shook my cock, instant icebreaker. Wife mentioned they loved Jen's bar and shield nipple decorations, asked for a closer look. The wife fondled for a bit, but the husband was getting aggressive with her tits, and because of the language barrier/situation, missed several of Jen's "back off" signals, including an "ok, that's enough" to the point where she finally looked over at me.

That was my signal. I leaned across, said," She said that's enough, guy." He came out of his trance, his wife slapped him, and all was well.

Mate guard for her, not for you.

[–]reformingbluepill5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy

Excellent response. Really hit me between the eyes with:

Don't mate guard. It's her job to say no to unwanted advances. Don't be a whiteknight, she doesn't need rescuing, all you're doing is looking insecure.

This has been my go-to response for years because I know she can handle herself just fine.

This incident just shook me up because it was under my roof by a guy that portrays an image of a groveling human doormat.

Also two other things

1 - I'm adding 'landwhalepigface' to my daily vocabulary.

2 - The sunburnt balls gave me a flashback to a painful memory. Few years ago I was celebrating winning a deal at my office. I took a piss while lighting a cigar and taking a phonecall at the same time. Bad idea when you're sober. Worse when you're drunk.

Ended up touching my nutsack with the scolding hot cigar lighter and dropping my phone.

Hurt for a looooooong time.

[–]friendandadvisor2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Excellent response.

Excellent response??? This is hilarious!

Your wife gets her ass slapped at your house, and you think that a tale of a woman juggling some dudes dick at a Hedonism resort, and subsequent actions, has ANY sort of parallel to your situation?

Then, you go on with tales of burning your balls??

I'm sorry, I do believe I've stumbled into Bizarro AskMRP!

[–]JudgeDoom692 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

and the man-poodle said: "What? I thought you were into alpha males?"

It's interesting that he said that. Perhaps you've been "talking about fight club" to your wife, and she naturally tells her sister everything

[–]reformingbluepill0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

It's not, but I can see how it looks that way based on the background provided.

[–]Bedtimeshine1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

I feel like I’m in the twilight zone. I can’t believe what I’m reading. Another man slaps my wife’s ass, I attack him... period. You can talk about the psychology of a 100 different things, which is happening in the comments but OP did nothing. Lecturing him? Huh? I wouldn’t say shit. I would let the fists fly. If there is ANY scenario where another man gropes your wife and you don’t hit him in the mouth you are not a man in my eyes and I don’t know how you look at yourself in the mirror.

[–]friendandadvisor1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

I feel like I’m in the twilight zone.


I feel that in about 3 months all of these limpdicks that say "Hey, bro! Don't let the guy that got a feel of your wife's ass provoke you into mateguarding!" will come back and say "WTF was I thinking!" I feel that. Unfortunately, my brain says otherwise.

[–]Bedtimeshine2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

Yeh it’s not even in the same realm as mate guarding. Trp has become just a bunch of dudes spouting theories and saying buzzwords. Get the fuck outta here. There are zero scenarios were a guy slaps my girls ass and we don’t fight. I don’t care if I get beat up, dont care about getting arrested... I’ve been beat up plenty of times... i don’t even care if it’s brock lesnar. I’ve been knocked out in front of girls. I’ve even gotten my leg broken in a fight. My nose has been broken more times than I can count. But I can still look at myself in the mirror everyday and know that I will die before I let myself get punked or my girl/relationship get disrespected by another man. Period. I know that I was never scared and never will be. No excuse to EVER take the route that OP did or the other commenters way of thinking.

TRP: “Women are inheranly attracted to violent, dangerous, courageous men.”

Also TRP “when shit pops off let your wife handle it and have a conversation about how she still needs to handle it for you if it ever happens again. Just smirk or something.”

[–]friendandadvisor0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Yeh it’s not even in the same realm as mate guarding. Trp has become just a bunch of dudes spouting theories and saying buzzwords.

No shit! Sad. IIRC, somewhere in the thread they even used 'A&A'. smh

[–]onthephonewithgod2 points3 points  (6 children) | Copy

You don't need anyone to validate your actions. Looks like you're pleased with how things went and you have a plan. What more do you want?

[–]reformingbluepill0 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy

Thanks. Just want to check if I'm not fooling myself by overlooking something that's blatantly obvious to guys with a clear and unbiased view.

[–]witnessthenomorebp0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy

This is categorized as Sexual Battery where I am from and we regularly see this prosecuted. I look it up for your state and see what the penalties are before talking to him to let him know you will be taking him to task for that and kicking his ass besides that.

[–]friendandadvisor2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

and we regularly see this prosecuted.

Around here, you'll get called SJW! They all think that taking exception to some geek pawing your wife's ass is 'mateguarding'!

[–]Rian_StoneMod / Red Beret1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

Yeah, your brother in law goes to jail, and happily ever after

[–]witnessthenomorebp1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Not that he has to call, just enough to keep him from calling the cops after he gets his ass beat by OP

[–]Rian_StoneMod / Red Beret1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy


[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy


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