Creating a step family

VintageVee · 2016-05-04T20:19:54+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Sunhappy_DC · 2016-05-04T20:17:24+00:00

don't side with the ex-wife
don't tell him how to parent
be a positive adult example of what a loving wife looks like
[EDIT] misread sorry.

CoochQuarantine · 2016-05-05T11:36:39+00:00

So I am doing this right now. He has 2 daughters (10, 11) and I have 1 daughter (15). So it has been interesting to say the least. Here are a few things that I have noticed and/or tried that have worked for me. I won't talk about what it was like for me with his kids but more what it was like for him with my kid.

Realize that he is another father figure in your kids life. Do not deny him that or deny yourself that. Inasmuch that you need to demonstrate to your kids how you treat a man who is head of household (or will be).
He should be the one initiating one-on-one time with your kids but you can tell him that you would like that.
I would go to the /r/ step kids or step parents subreddit and check out some posts over there. There are some great book resources that are recommended. I read the Step-Motherhood by Cherie Burns and I found it a treasure trove of good information. So I am assuming that maybe the other books might be good too. I'm a book worm and also a self help book junkie so this really hits the nail on the head for me.
Always acknowledge that you appreciate ANYTHING he does for your kids. They are not his. He doesn't have to do anything for them. So be grateful and show it. He will cook for us sometimes and it always amazes me how much care he takes in preparing her food. I always remember to thank him for including her and being kind to her. Even if it is as small as making her a grilled cheese.
Never bad mouth your ex to him. That is just a general no no but moreso because you have a kid with this person you are badmouthing. That is just an added layer of ugly.

That is really all I can think of. My kid is older so it isn't much he can do by way of helping to raise her but she is at an age where she is starting to be all about the boys so I'm just trying to set the best example I can in showing her what a good relationship looks like.

sugarcrush · 2016-05-04T20:20:02+00:00

I don't have any experience with this, but it would probably be helpful to others if you shared how many children each of you has, their ages, and what the situation is like with the other bio parent.

Title	Creating a step family
Author	VintageVee
Upvotes	13
Comments	19
Date	May 4, 2016 7:30 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWives
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWives/comments/4hw6o1/creating_a_step_family/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWives/creating-a-step-family.210022 https://theredarchive.com/post/210022

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