After the flaming train wreck that I discussed in my last field report, I ended things with the girl and I'm back to playing the field. I took a week off to decompress, reevaluate my decisions, and catch up on some RP reading. Refreshed, I took the opportunity to hit last night hard. It was a buddy's birthday, and about 40 people were there getting absolutely shitfaced, including the girl that this FR concerns, who I'll call "Emily".

I've known her for a few year now and she's your typical "chill" girl. Smokes way too much weed and has a ton of male orbiters besties because "girls are just so much drama". Face is alright, but she's got a tiny waist and a FAT ass. Unsurprisingly, all these guys catch feelings for her and she basks in the attention. Free meals, weed, help with her college work, you name it. Emily's very talkative and easy going, so even at parties and events guys fall for her quick. Also unsurprisingly, this girl is a giant sloot, ridden hard and put away wet, but young enough that her lifestyle hasn't hit her looks yet. Her crowning triumph is fucking three different guys in one day, so you know we're talking about a real catch.

These girls are a dime a dozen; nothing new here.

Now here is where things get interesting. Last year, after her Sparknotes years of abridged and condensed fucking, this girl decided to get off the carousel. Emily spent the summer overseas visiting her homeland, where she met a nice religious virgin who became her boyfriend. Who even after she amazingly gave him full disclosure about her past decided to stand by her. They had a beautiful summer romance together, SEX-FREE OF COURSE, because you know she's been hurt in the past and wants to make sure it's real. She returned stateside and every night he maintained his duties as emotional tampon via Skype and Facebook. Shockingly enough, she didn't cheat or stray in the 14 or so months they've been together. Until last night...

The party was in full swing by the time I arrived. I made my rounds and was in the kitchen fixing a drink when Emily comes in and we start catching up. At first it's the usual school, life, small talk bullshit, but as it always does the topic of relationships came up. Things are going well with her beta boo, but it's been almost a year and change since she's had sex and she really misses it. And then she drops this bomb.

Me: I don't get it. Why don't you just have sex with [boyfriend]?

Emily: Are you fucking kidding me? We're never having sex until we're married.

Me: Even knowing about the one night stands and all he's cool with that?

Emily: Of course! He doesn't judge me at all. But I still miss sex so much. Haha why am I even telling you this?

I don't think I've ever seen such blatant AF/BB. It's fucking cartoonish.

As the night continued Emily kept getting cozier and touchier with me. Rubbing my arms, leaning on me, head on my shoulder, etc. And every so often she brings up sex and fucking and missing it while giving me the bedroom eyes. I'm suspicious, because there's no way a girl would so casually shit all over a serious relationship. ...Right?

I break away for a bit to hang out with the birthday boy. Meanwhile Emily has two chumps enraptured as she talks to them about rock music and Warped Tour. They're loving it, and you could see them get fucking erect with happiness that they finally met a "chill girl" that they can talk to without the usual bullshit. The standards for girls are so fucking low that if they manage to talk about something other than shopping and partying for 30 seconds they're suddenly super cool and interesting. Later on a bunch of us join them in a circle bullshitting about life. One guy was adamantly trying to convince us that any guy who puts anything up his ass/stimulates his prostate is automatically gay, even if he only fucks girls. Which is relevant because homegirl blurts out:

Emily: Hey, my boyfriend loves a finger up his butt. I don't blame him. I LOOOVE anal.

And then she looks right at me. I'm sitting there thinking that there's no way this girl is for real. Not only is airing her man out like that totally inappropriate, but her need for attention is insane. On top of that, she's not letting him fuck her but she's shoving shit up his ass? Meanwhile her two simps are wetting themselves in excitement thinking they found the jackpot, even if she has a boyfriend.

The night winds down and people start heading home. The moment of truth arrives as Emily's two new orbiters try to get her number before they leave. Forget bros before hoes, the two "friends" just put each other down hoping she'll pick only one of them. The insults turn into a full on shoving match between the two until she decides to compromise by giving her number to both of them. They're barely out the door when her phone starts blowing up with the "it was so cool meeting you" texts. Even if her boyfriend is king beta, these guys aren't competition at all.

I was too drunk to drive so I made myself comfortable on the couch for the night. I say goodnight to my buddy before he heads to his room. Suddenly, Emily decides that she wants to spend the night too. Despite plenty of available space, she sits on the couch right next to me. Game, set, match.

Half an hour later I'm balls deep in her ass while the other dudes are texting her goodnight.

I hesitated to share this because it reads like Red Pill porn. Too ridiculous to be true. But let this be a very blunt reminder that you can never turn a hoe into a housewife, "born-again" is absolute bullshit, and a LDR of any sort is a fool's choice. Girls want to have sex, and if she's not getting it from you she's definitely getting it somewhere. Thanks for reading!