I have been into self-improvement for about 2 years now but only recently found theredpill. It seems like I missed a lot of valuable information but I suppose I did not discover this subreddit because it is fairly controversial. However, only results matter and your methods not only work but are based on science and logic which I think is really convincing.

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Obviously I am new and as you can already see in the title I'm short. 160cm (5"3') to be precise.

Some background information so you know what you are dealing with. I'm not and have never been a total loser. But as long as I can think I have struggled with women and the fact that I'm a beta push over. After 2 years of working on myself I have finally come close to being satisfied with my outer appearence (style, haircut, working out, etc.). It was hard but I think improving your looks is easy when compared to changing your mindset. This will be my next big step and I really do not know how I should master this complicated and complex task.

Of course I did not only better my looks in the last 2 years but also started to work on my social skills. Before I started I was rather awkward and insecure but nofap and some mental tricks have already helped. However, I still have mild social anxiety, especially with new people and girls.

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Now to the main reason of this post: Height.

Naturally I had to take a lot of shit when I was younger but it also made me more resistent to verbal attacks. I have been at peace with my height since years, mainly because I have a lot of other qualities (intelligent, good humour, persistent, relatively good looking face, to name a few) so it's not like I'm not convinced of myself (even though my self-esteem should be way higher than it currently is).

However, I recently finished school and am now at university and the change in my environment has caused a lot of old issues I had with my height to resurface. They can be divided into two main categories:

  • Male perception: Other men percieve me as weak because I'm shorter. Of course the taller you are the more muscle mass you have but most of them are weak and I doubt could lift more than I can. I guess their displayed superiority is because they think they could beat me if they wanted to and I don't know how to respond to this. As I said most of them are rather weak for their height and have never done any martial arts (I did karate for 7 years and want to start again) so I doubt they are actually stronger than me but it's not like I can punch them in the face. Another thing is that people that are percieved as weak are not taken seriously. I also notice how I act differently (a little too funny/like a clown) because they do not take me seriously which is a vicious circle.
  • Female perception: I always thought I am bad with girls because I lack confidence (especially in that part of my life, 19 and never kissed a girl) and am beta but after I did some internet research I discovered that women are actually even more shallow then I expected. I really don't know how I am supposed to be attractive and confident when I am not even pervieved as a potential mate. Again, I noticed that women do not take me seriously. A lot of it can definitely be attributed to my mindset and how I act but I'm rather sure my height plays an important role too. It makes sense from a biological standpoint: Women look for a protector and because the evolutionary hardwiring is not really up-to-date they think "tall=protection" when it should be "strong & able to fight = protection". And that is just from a physical standpoint, not to mention that in todays society status, financial stability and intelligence are far more important.

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I'm aware that the same strategies of theredpill/psychology etc. still apply no matter how you look. But I am sure that there are some things I have to focus on more and pay more attention to (no napoleon complex, even harder to stay confident and alpha). The last days have been really hard for my mental strength and I seriously felt like giving up (it does not help that I'm currently suffering from acute oneitis) but I do not feel like wasting the one life I have with self-pity but instead have to work with what I have and can change (also looking into stoicism for that).

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To sum it up: How do I become a confident alpha when I'm lacking one key masculine feature? How do I become more of an independent leader? How do I "compensate" for my height? And how do I deal with female biological hardwiring? Is it really just about the right mindset?

Any advice is appreciated.