Advice?

LogPRB · 2019-09-03T22:29:04+00:00

Hi. I don't mean for this to come off as "preachy," but for you and your child's sake you shouldn't explore the stay-at-home-mom option without a marital commitment. Career and hobby options aside, at the moment you are putting yourself at risk of being a single mom. I'm not talking about tomorrow or next year. Think 5 years down the road. A future split would be even harder on you financially if you were to choose not to work and have a ten-year career gap. I don't mean to say your relationship isn't great now because I bet it is. But things can change over time especially when you throw children and difficult times into the mix. Please protect yourself by getting this man to put a title on things.

melitele3 · 2019-09-03T23:00:49+00:00

Personally I would want to get married as soon as possible. There is really no reason to wait. You need to think about different scenarios and at the moment you and the baby are very vulnerable and aren’t financially “insured”.

Other than that, don’t you have any hobbies or passions? Since your boyfriend works from home he needs to focus and distracting him could have a bad effect on his productivity. I would advise you to find yourself activities that will keep you busy for the time when your boyfriend works.

For example my hobbies are: reading books, listening to free lectures on you tube, playing video games, learning new languages, cooking, baking, organizing, playing flute, singing, traveling, exercising, writing, learning geography and watching historical tv shows.

nevomintoarce · 2019-09-04T13:09:24+00:00

How did you manage to get pregnant after 6 months of dating your "entrepreneur" boyfriend? Did you do this on purpose to trap him and make him fund your stay at home mom dreams? Either way, you'll probably end up a single mother and you will regret this.

lessabe · 2019-09-04T02:54:01+00:00

I wouldn’t stay at home full time without getting married that’s setting you up for lost wages, and potentially single motherhood as well. I am a married SAHM and my husband works from home. To put your new role into perspective show your boyfriend how expensive raising a child is when working (daycare, housecleaning, errands, etc) and let him know since you’re planning on working then he’s going to have to help equally around the house. This might make him take marriage seriously as otherwise you’re leaving yourself really really vulnerable. If he doesn’t make a commitment work part time and/or work towards getting a degree if you don’t have one that way you have an out if your relationship doesn’t work.

My marriage was so shaky when I had my newborn as my husband was playing tons of video games and I was feeling overwhelmed with lack of sleep and being emotional with is normal. We’re doing way better now thankfully. Your relationship will most likely be very volatile with a newborn and a future promise of marriage before or working towards it after may help that. Also I’d advise taking classes together to prepare you for parenthood...anything that really works on your relationship during this period.

nevomintoarce · 2019-09-04T04:26:23+00:00

Be a stay at home mom as long as you possibly can. Find a hobby, volunteer, something for yourself... eventually. Your baby deserves the best care, and that comes from their mommy. Congrats on being a mom! Truly the greatest joy ♡

Lola_L_O_L_A_Lola · 2019-09-03T23:12:20+00:00

Don't buy in to the idea that you need external systems to feel fulfillment and happiness.

When you hold that child, you will have the greatest happiness possible. Whatever fulfillment you think you lack will vanish on your child's birth day.

To pass the time until the joyous occasion, you can give to those around you through volunteering. That can bring you a quick feeling of fulfillment. Go read aloud to some kids or elders, it will be good practice for reading to your baby. Also, he will admire you for this.

Title	Advice?
Author	roseyylove
Upvotes	7
Comments	31
Date	September 3, 2019 10:00 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/czbkz3/advice/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/advice.251856 https://theredarchive.com/post/251856

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