Are the family-courts lopsided in the favor of women?

Atlas_B_Shruggin · 2018-10-05T16:38:56+00:00

you might want to save a serious post for after purge week

Orange_Paisley · 2018-10-05T17:40:30+00:00

Some fathers don't want custody, to be fair. My ex didn't. My dad didn't. A lot of my friends' kids' dads didn't. Child support is something entirely different. In a situation where both parents are decent and both WANT custody, 50/50 arrangements should be standard and I know some that have managed to work that out.

ayeitsurboylomein · 2018-10-05T16:29:54+00:00

Family courts are heavily lopsided in favor of the parent who spends the most time with the child, and almost always rule in favor of whichever parent is willing to see the whole court process through to the end.

About 80% of fathers agree to shared custody or no custody before the court can rule. Fathers who stick it out have just as good a chance as the mother for shared or full custody. Most custody agreements are made between the parents and their lawyers, not a judge.

Uncommon_Sense_12345 · 2018-10-05T21:04:50+00:00

You are 22 and I can tell from your post and replies you are not ready for marriage. Marriage takes two and it just takes one of the two to trash the whole thing.

i_have_a_semicolon · 2018-10-05T16:53:36+00:00

It's lopsided in favor of women, yes

ZodiacBrave98 · 2018-10-05T17:02:24+00:00

Yes. Next question.

CainPrice · 2018-10-05T17:21:37+00:00

That 43% figure went up for awhile, to around 50%, but it's going down a little now. Not because marriages are more stable but because fewer people are getting married, and a bigger proportion of the people that are marrying are late 20s, college-educated, upper middle class people (who have been a less likely segment for divorce the entire time).

Women still get primarily custody most of the time, if they ask for it. Primary means the kid lives with Mom, Dad gets every other weekend and one weeknight each week, they alternate holidays. However, with the increased number of women who work demanding jobs and the fact that divorced moms want to date, there's been an upswing in 50-50 custody arrangements, where Mom and Dad alternate weeks. However, in most states, the default custody arrangement is Mom=primary, Dad=alternate weekends, and if Mom asks for that, it's pretty much automatic. You'd have to prove that Mom is incompetent and downright dangerous to get anything different. Men fighting back in court for more custody is a waste of time and money except in special circumstances where Mom is incompetent, dangerous, or she's the 80 hour a week breadwinner while Dad stays home.

The parent who has primary custody receives child support from the parent that doesn't, so that usually favors Mom. In 50-50 custody arrangements, the parent who makes less money usually gets support from the parent who makes more, which also usually favors Mom. In my state, it's pretty common for Dad to pay lots of support (far in excess of what he ought to pay for 50-50 custody) regardless of income, because Dad agreeing to a big support payment is part of the deal for Mom not asking for more than 50-50 custody.

Women still initiate divorce the overwhelming majority of the time. Admittedly, some of the divorces initiated by women occur in situations of infidelity or abuse by their husbands (And in the small portion of divorces initiated by men, it's likely a similar proportion of those occur due to infidelity or abuse by the woman, so it's kind of a wash), but the huge majority are just irreconcilable differences (she's not happy).

CatchPhraze · 2018-10-05T19:40:18+00:00

Stasticaly men are given full custody of their child more often then women when asked.

But they do struggle in getting equal custody. Sadly most fathers agree on custody before courts.

Title	Are the family-courts lopsided in the favor of women?
Author	ayeitsurboylomein
Upvotes	3
Comments	51
Date	October 5, 2018 4:11 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/9lnnam/are_the_familycourts_lopsided_in_the_favor_of/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/are-the-family-courts-lopsided-in-the-favor-of.259921 https://theredarchive.com/post/259921

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