I'm female. I come from a traditionally catholic family where the older generations were raised to be housewives. Then the revolution happened (Portugal, 1974) and women got to work and go to school.

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The older women in my family are housewife types. They may have jobs but do everything around the house and raise children. None are particularly educated and most haven't made it past 4th grade. My maternal grandmother is illiterate. Their marriages are crap. The older men in my family are extremely sexist mommy's boys who mostly failed at life. Both them and their traditional women types resent younger women (ie my mother, who got out) and their favourite insult is "whore". They gossip endlessly about us and my uncles are always looking at me in a creepy way. The result of this traditionalistic nonsense is that men are cheating, sexist, entitled slobs and women become mentally unstable failures who turn their sons into manchildren and pit them against each other, the men who show a little bit of potential are sucked dry and turn into slobs when they burn out, everyone hates people who are actually capable because let's face it, if your worth and life philosophy comes from something you didn't choose or earn (birth sex) odds are you don't really amount to anything. It's a never ending shitshow of gossiping, petty fights and drama.

If you want to know my story lookup my posts on r/raisedbynarcissists but that's besides the point.

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The so-called traditional women in my family are all quite crazy, dysfunctional, and then men are sexist, controlling mommy's boys.

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The other side of the coin is "modern" women who let men treat them like doormats and still think themselves "empowered" and still show off their husbands and their accomplishments instead of their own, very much like those traditional women they criticize. Looks like those types only use their education and money because they'd rather be alone than be with a low status man but will act like those passive traditional women for the right one. (example: my mother is one of those modern independent women but loves princesses and the monarchy. Go figure. I noticed she even imitates princess Diana mannerisms but it just makes her look retarded. I digress)

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Think of black slaves: if they hadn't ever revolted and thought, instead, that white men are superior and they are biologically programmed to submit to the white man and that the best they could hope for is a white master who doesn't treat them too badly and if they could ever get educated they just used that education to be alone until they can find the "right" white slaver they would still be treated like crap today and this attitude would make life very difficult for black slaves who truly wanted to be free. Now no one (that's not a racist) would say that the emancipation of black slaves was a bad thing. Same thing. The blacks could be very easily led to think that they are "inferior" because the white man had better technology.

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I think feminists should spend less time blaming men and more time changing themselves and women. The best solution for women is not the matriarchy or gender quotas or sleeping around or working and dumping your kids in daycare because "you can have it all!!11!" (you can't). I wish feminists would focus more on something that works for women and criticize both traditional women and modern slutty strong independent womyn for the mess they are and find a solution that works and focus less on nonsense.