Asked a girl out for the very first time in my life

rporion · 2015-03-15T22:32:29+00:00

Fuck it, you did it.

Way more important than succeeding, because her saying no did not kill you, right?

So, you can do it again!

SkorchZang · 2015-03-16T06:56:31+00:00

Gotta start somewhere man. Here's a friendly challenge for you, collect 6 more "oh I have a boyfriend already" rejections. Your lucky 7. Once you got them, feel free to PM me about it so we can bounce a couple ideas around on how to level up your approach.

It's one thing to read some theory and agree with it, but quite another to feel in your gut that wait a minute, I'm fucking letting those girls off the hook way too easy... they're just slipping away without any effort aren't they...

TheRedPillGod · 2015-03-16T02:20:30+00:00

keep lifting, read books, do your hobbies, keep making yourself better.

Well done, you took the very first step.

Let me remind you something that 14 year old me wouldn't believe, to get a girl, you cant expect to just sit around, waiting for a girl to start a conversation with you and expect to seduce her solely with your personality and then hope she kisses you.

I am now 20, and am no pro, but the biggest realization ive had is that you are a hunter, and as a hunter, the only way to get the prize is to actually go out there and murder that mutherfuggin' prey.

What I'm trying to say is, you're only gonna get girls if you approach them, and they'll only get that youre interested if you show interest. Things only get done when you actually get off your ass and do them.

Read the sidebar, self-actualize, approach, rince wash and repeat until victory is achieved. Every day.

At some point, maybe in a few years, what you want to do is fully internalize the practice and let go of the helping wheels (The red pill fora).

NonNisiTe · 2015-03-15T22:37:30+00:00

Good job on asking the girl out. You win some and you lose some but that was a good first step. Keep at it.

I am not an alpha male. Probably more of a sigma (if such a thing exists). I disagree with you on how you view friends. I let someone be my friend because I enjoy being around them and I connect with them. I have never made a friend just because they were "cool" and I wanted to be cool too by having cool friends. Part of being Alpha is being yourself and not giving that much of a fuck. Be friends with whoever you connect with. Don't have friends just because you need friends. You will get miserable fast that way.

Edit: And stop worrying about your image so much. You sound pretty beta by how much you care about how others think of you. It is okay to be nervous that is a part of life. Don't think you are less of a man because you aren't "perfect".

favours_of_the_moon · 2015-03-16T01:04:48+00:00

You know, many women are idiots. They don't know what they want and they don't know what is good for them.

You can lead a ho to water, but you can't make them drink. It's not you, it's her.

pipefitterap162 · 2015-03-16T02:42:55+00:00

Hell yah! Keep it up man. Before you know it, you'll be writing a three some FR.

Neo-ReactionaryHarry · 2015-03-16T03:24:13+00:00

good job! Honestly I'm proud of you man. I know some people might criticize you but that's bullshit. If you're in a situation like that, every little victory counts! Remember though, great generals don't win battles, they win wars! Like George Washington, mediocre at best military leader but he knew how to win the war.

[deleted] · 2015-03-16T08:23:14+00:00

a black belt is a white belt who didnt quit and every dog has his day if he doesnt give up

tropicalfire · 2015-03-16T08:30:19+00:00

Look at the bright side, it could have been worse. I was in the same situation few weeks ago, with only one difference. I asked out my one-itis. In the worst possible way. And obviously got rejected. You can imagine how I felt. And I'm still not over her completely.

Pm_MeyourManBoobs · 2015-03-16T14:14:10+00:00

Congrats dude - nothing good comes easy. When she says, "I have a boyfriend." Your response, "Nice. Our first secret. Let's go get a drink..." Never understood giving up on the boyfriend thing, who cares, is he there with her? No? Then fair game and women are hypergamous so if you give her a tingle, a point above her current boyfriend, she will probably end up taking that drink with you...good luck

Sketti-Os · 2015-03-16T15:42:51+00:00

"Sucking at something is the first step to being sorta good at something"

-Jake the dog

Some may be hypercritical of you here, saying you shouldn't have given up, but fuck that. I think I speak for the most level-headed of us here when I say good job. Most people don't understand having bad social anxiety. But you looked your fear in the eyes and peed on its leg. Dust yourself off and try again. Keep peeing on fear's leg.

TheBadGod · 2015-03-16T18:27:52+00:00

Regarding the "I have a boyfriend" objection;

It's just an objection she needs you to overcome. It's the sales equivalent of "I'm just looking."

It means she's straight and is actively having sex.

If she is talking to you at all, then her "boyfriend" is simply a temporary condition that she's hoping you will remedy. Any satisfied person with a solid Significant Other meets conversation with a stranger with confusion, not as an opportunity to meet somebody new.

Master1176 · 2015-03-16T18:41:15+00:00

You're doing great brother. Keep up the work and it will be rewarded! Falling down isn't as important as getting back up. Always get back up.

[deleted] · 2015-03-16T08:53:43+00:00

Fuck yea bro. To be quite honest, the first time I legit asked a girl "out" AF style and got a tingly response was in the past year. That smile was story girl imagining the fux for a few pounds. I can't say if you could have done anything or not, obviously only you and her were there. I said "cute." once and the conversion rolled on. Depends what you want... sometimes I talk to people without wanting anything more than to talk; impossible logistics or something, like being 50 miles from home via. transit. It's fun practicing conversing if you want to. Maybe she wants to get in touch for something random a couple days later and it comes out that she is now single, if you're open to that.

Niketi · 2015-03-16T11:29:13+00:00

Ah yes, haven't had the boyfriend rejection in years. Must be getting old. Welcome to the war marine.

makethemwant · 2015-03-16T12:30:57+00:00

In my mind, Red Pill Theory is for men who already are comfortable with picking up women but are struggling to understand what to do with them once they get them - through a psycho-analysis of how women think.

For you, I would recommend you build your confidence by learning concrete skills related to giving women the gina-tingles.

My personal favorite book of all time is this very little known one: http://www.amazon.com/50-Secrets-Picking-Up-Girls/dp/B00EZMEDCA

To me, this book has taken a red-pill approach to identifying all the things a man can do to give a woman the tingles. While I've read and appreciated the majority of the PUA literature out there, the above book does a stellar job of laser-focusing on 50 key techniques. In the back there is a ten-day program for success. I have never completed the program because I never get through it before I end up having attracted a woman to the point of sex.

Red Pill Theory (again this is my view) is for after you feel comfortable with your ability to attract and sleep with women and you're wondering what's next.

TheFastCat · 2015-03-16T15:58:48+00:00

Great job buddy - keep it up.

TheBadGod · 2015-03-16T18:24:05+00:00

Next time just BE out with her.

I never asked my current LTR out. I never even got her number. Even when I was plating girls, I never "asked them out" or "got their number."

"Do you want to get out of here?" worked 100% of the time to get me laid. It's not a plan, it's not a "date." It's a non-descript way to get her somewhere else with you.

You don't even have to WANT to have sex. You two can just be somewhere else, getting to know each other. And you made it happen by taking charge.

Master1176 · 2015-03-16T18:42:52+00:00

Something like this works often:

"Hey, I'm going to (some cool event) - you should come by."

Don't ask. Tell her where you'll be, and if she wants to come by and see you - cool. If not, cool too.

screamingATtrees · 2015-03-21T00:19:57+00:00

"I'm seeing someone..."

"cool.. What's his name I might know him..."

"....uh...."

"liar! Lol"

thenarrrowpath · 2015-03-23T19:00:24+00:00

Great first step. Keep in mind its a journey full of peaks and valleys. You will find yourself in the depths of those valleys but as long as you stay RP and keep working on yourself (lifting, running game, style, etc.) you will be at a peak before you know it. Up and down, up and down, just get used to it.

Title	Asked a girl out for the very first time in my life
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	32
Comments	22
Date	March 15, 2015 10:25 PM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/2z6352/asked_a_girl_out_for_the_very_first_time_in_my/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/asked-a-girl-out-for-the-very-first-time-in-my.30256 https://theredarchive.com/post/30256

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