On the value of criticism I was in the RedPill IRC chatroom the other day, and there was this guy who was asking for our advice on how to handle a number he just picked up. I believe his plan was to text a bartendress he met an hour before “Are you ready for some fun this Friday : )? A few people including myself jumped on it and tried to help him out.

*“Emojis are feminine. They convey comfort and serve only to supplicate.”

“You come off as needy when you’re first text conveys sexual undertones like it does.”

“Don’t schedule things 5 days in advance with a girl you just met. She’s gonna flake.”

“Build some rapport. Have an intro that goes along the lines ‘Is this the girl who ?”*

All decent general rules to abide by.

The guy in question had a problem with the presentation of this advice. He called us all dicks and chose to ignore our advice, telling us that ‘emojis were part of his text game’. And that’s fine, it doesn’t personally bother me in the slightest, but it got me thinking about criticism and how men have become sensitive fucking snowflakes who can’t take being shot down when they ask for feedback.

We’re so used to everyone telling us what a great job we did over and over again (especially when we missed a few metaphorical spots). This is a problem, because you don’t grow when you’re coddled like that.

The best advice I’ve ever gotten has been when they’re brutally honest and aren’t afraid to hurt my feeeeelingz.

When I had a broken leg and a shittty limp and resigned myself to never squatting because of my limited mobility and weakened muscle tissue, u/gayLubeOil personally called me a bitch and told me to fucking squat or forever be a faggot. He wasn’t nice. He didn’t hold my hand and throw a pity party for me getting royally fucked up. NO. He told me what I needed to do if I wanted to be a man about the whole thing. And I appreciate that. Why? Because that week I started squatting and 2 weeks later my limp was gone. And I think it was because of the squats. Honestly it was fucking magic.

Sometimes, we just need someone to kick our ass into shape. Embrace it. And if you ask for advice, it’s either because you want the advice, or you want to circlejerk with everyone complimenting you and telling you you’re special just the way you are. That sorta circlejerk is only reserved for women so cut it the fuck out. You’re here to grow and learn and become great.

When people tell me what a fuckup I'm being, I respond "thank you. I appreciate that." In the most non-sarcastic way I can. Because they're only saying it to help me stop being a fuckup. Otherwise they wouldn't call me out on my bullshit in the first place.

TL;DR The truth hurts. So does lifting. Embrace it and stop being such a bitch about criticism.

EDIT 1: I think my point is not to blindly take advice, but instead to ignore the bluntness and lack of coddling from the person gives it to you.