I've been living with my boyfriend for 2 and a half years. Things went down the hill since June due to a lot of health problems he's having, plus he has anxiety, so right now he looks like a hollow body without feelings. I wanted to be by his side, but I gave up my hobbies, my life to try to support him, and that's not working, neither for him or me.

I left behind my youth to be a good partner, I took care of his stepson(4m) without thinking twice, I left my needs aside. And now I feel empty, I want to give up, but I don't want to hurt him.

I still love him to the bottom of my heart but I can't see a future with him, or at least a happy future for me. I know love is pain but this is too much!

Also I've been thinking lately of all the things I've gave up to make him happy, I left behind my hobbies, I used to run and go to the gym, I used to dress the way I liked I now I have to pass his judgement. I feel like everything and do and am is influenced by him or his choices, and before this relationship I used to be a very strong woman. How did I end up like this?

I am at a point that I can't change the couple's dynamic. Or I live with this shitty dynamic for the rest of my life or I live this relationship.

I want to continue on my own, I want to live a life by myself, but how do I do that smoothly/without pain if we leave together? How do I start the conversation, how do I get some balls?

I always avoided conflicts so this is something I really wanted to avoid, but I am young and I want to feel like my life has sense again.

Note: I don't own anything, the house belongs to him, but that's better for me to start from zero, I think. Also we work together so I should look for a new job...

tl;dr: How do I end a relationship with someone unstable without hurting him?