Military Divorce

StratOmaticFanatic · 2019-03-13T01:58:00+00:00

I can live on around $100 a month in groceries, it sucks but it's doable. Lots and lots of chicken leg quarters. 10 pound bag is $5.90 at the local Walmart. They make great chicken and rice soup (rice is cheap also). Potatoes are pretty cheap too and leg quarters make a really good gravy to pour over either rice or potatoes. If you don't know how to cook I'd start learning.

Stay out of bars and restaurants. If you smoke or have any other bad expensive habits seriously think about quitting them. It will make a world of difference financially and physically. Only drive when you absolutely have to, if somewhere you want to go is withing walking or biking distance, walk or bike. I ditched my vehicle in favor of a bicycle and I can honestly say it was one of the best things I ever did. Not saying you should or could do that but I don't regret it at all.

I keep the heat at my house on 65 degrees instead of the usual 72 which has saved me average of $70+ a month on heating bills this winter. If you don't heat and instead have air cooling then think about shutting that down or at least cutting back usage. I'm sure there's a whole bunch of places you can cut back to save yourself some money. Get creative, every little bit helps.

Cable TV is another utility that you can live better without. Cut the cord or at the very least get the cheapest package available.

Believe me, you'll manage. And like another poster said you'll come out stronger than ever. I can't say that I never thought about ending it but I just couldn't give the ex the satisfaction of knowing she had that kind of power over me. Also didn't want my kids to see that I was that weak. Your a Man, you can do anything you set your mind too.

Tercalerc · 2019-03-13T01:18:01+00:00

Make your name reality. Become BEASTLY! You got divorce rekt...but you got divorce rekt as a MAN. Who should GTOW. You can recover. And if you believe so, you WILL, and not only that but come out of the other side stronger than ever before. You. Got. This.

Heraklines · 2019-03-13T01:27:18+00:00

Save up some money and pop smoke and ghost, when you have the opportunity. They wont chase you to other countries for child support. Honestly better to start anew then being a slave to some unthankful broad.

FlameForgeD2 · 2019-03-13T04:35:59+00:00

Well here's a pretty crazy option, and only consider this if you are low ranked (E-2 to E-4) so your career has time to recover or if you are not planning to make a career of the military.

Go get demoted, hear me out on this. Go UA/AWOL for a day, fall asleep on post or some shit and get dropped back to an E-1. No drugs, no DUI, nothing that will get you booted or cost a shitload, just something to get demoted. Get a lawyer and utilize the E-1 pay as the base for your new child support/alimony payment. Get this payment set in stone and make sure it cannot be recalculated for at least 2 years.

By doing this you should also end up being put back into the barracks because your company will want to keep a closer eye on you which will also lower you pay because of no more BAH. Your new income is $1,599.90 per month and your $750/month child support is way too large and will require a massive adjustment. Your new payment should be around $255/month. Your ex will go fucking apeshit, and it is all part of the plan.

By taking such a huge hit in her income and reducing it vastly you have shown her that you truly don't give a fuck and it is possible that she could have her income reduced even further depending on your actions. Make sure to tell her quietly when you know you aren't being recorded that if she ever tries to raise your child support again, you will get kicked out of the military completely and not be able to ever find a job in the civ div unless you work under the table and then she will really be fucked. (This is just a bluff)

Once this painful process is complete you are born again hard. All you do is work out and take as many extra classes/qualifications to advance your rank/pay as possible. Volunteer for everything. Get deployed, you will get hazardous duty pay in addition to it being tax-free if you're in another country. Go to ranger school if you're army, MCI's/training courses if you're a Marine and whatever the fuck the navy and chair force do, you do it!

Sound pretty crazy and risky? Sure it is. But the crazy shit is, I watched 2 of my buddies do it and they got the idea from another couple guys who had done it as well. One of them is in the civ div now with an honorable discharge making $100k/yr and the other just picked up E-7 and still has another 5 years to go until his retirement. Both are still only paying the minimum because they scared the shit out of their ex's so badly.

Also, very important- Never show her your rank once this has happened and delete all social media to help shelter yourself from her prying eyes. Ask your buddies to never take a pic of you in uniform and always have a cheap but safe vehicle/economy car to pick up the kid with. Always cast the illusion that you are as broke as a joke on coke. Ask her for gas/McDonald's happy meal money everytime you get the kid. If she says no, big deal. You have still created the illusion that you're broke and that's all she needs to see.

Edit- You would only be screwing over your child if you killed yourself. Go get even instead. Bonus points if you wait until she buys a new car or house first.

User-31f64a4e · 2019-03-13T02:13:27+00:00

Buckle down, and pursue advancement.
What are you? Probably not a Bird Colonel or a First Sargent.
Pick up anything which boosts pay - Airborne tab, whatever. If Navy, you want sea duty (unless you can get in to procurement, in a way which lets you take advantage of the revolving door).

In the mean time, it sounds like BOQ or a similar billet, eat at the mess, etc. for the forseeable future.

It's rough now; it will get better.

Tailback · 2019-03-13T02:15:52+00:00

Can't you move into the barracks? Eat at the mess hall?

Anonymously_Aroused · 2019-03-13T02:43:37+00:00

But I thought everyone said the mgtow subreddit was only full of virgins?

Exactly_what_I_think · 2019-03-13T01:36:21+00:00

expatriate

/r/IWantOut

Belrick_NZ · 2019-03-13T05:15:09+00:00

leave the country

denounce citizenship

RedPillLawyerGuy · 2019-03-13T13:31:27+00:00

Do a full breakdown of all of your necessary monthly expenses -- car payment, rent, renter's insurance, utilities, etc. Don't include luxury items like your cell phone, internet, DirectTV, that kind of stuff. Now add in your child support. If the total is more than your take home, go to your attorney and ask him to take a look at filing a motion for relief from the judgment under Rule 60 of your Rules of Civil Procedure in the state you live in, which allows relief for good cause, and other things. Many states have child support "guidelines" that include a provision allowing a downward deviation on account of other necessary debts and expenses. Your state may have such a provision. The $1000 on attorney fees that you'll spend will DWARF the money you'll pay to your ex in child support.

Source: am family law attorney.

Estimated attorney time: 2 hours to write the motion (including meeting with you), 1 hour to prep, 2 hours for the hearing, and approx. 30 minutes writing the order for the judge.

Also: Disclaimer, I don't intend to creating an attorney-client privilege, this is not legal advice particular to your state (which I don't even know), consult a family law attorney in your state.

Althoughw · 2019-03-13T05:15:43+00:00

If a good man dies for this, the world is a worse place. Make sure she dies first, or the corrupt state-parasite who pronounced that sentence You are a man of strength, if you kill a good man, for what evil cunts and judges are doing, you're doing a disservice to us all.

RPdOF · 2019-03-13T02:08:24+00:00

Head over to Family Services brother. Talk to a counselor to help with the suicidal ideation. You can get through this man.

Also, maybe some of the legal eagles can think of a way to get it reduced? Won't hurt to ask.

Varsel · 2019-03-13T04:49:20+00:00

Actions (and bad decisions) have consequences. Endure, and NEVER repeat obvious mistakes.

raskatech · 2019-03-13T06:42:07+00:00

You might wanna look at very easy side gigs such as flipping iPhones. Doesn't take much time out of the time you spend working. All you do is buy a phone (for example iPhone X) at a lower price than the market price by posting a facebook/craigslist ad saying (I BUY PHONES). Then you just flip it, sometime profits ranging up to $200-$250 per iPhone. I'm not saying this is the only way. But this is just one easy thing I do on the side, as a full time college student while also working. If you do this, you might rank in around $1000 to even $2000 extra per month on the side. Best of luck!

Ronin281 · 2019-03-13T08:17:43+00:00

Seriously OP, give us more info. Are you U.S. Miltary? What branch and rank? Many of us are ex-military and that’s a level of brotherhood beyond MGTOW. I have a Master’s in Business and can point you in the direction of supplementing income on the side. You don’t have to suffer but you will have to grind.

gopher_glitz · 2019-03-13T09:31:44+00:00

That is super shitty, I hope you tell all the men around you not to get married.

Kabla82 · 2019-03-13T09:45:15+00:00

"Quitting is not an option." what you're going through sucks it will be hard to survive but it's not impossible don't let a bitch like that make you feel this way but you're not alone there's alot of men in your position and you're not in the right state of mind to make the decision you are suggesting to make so don't rush into it and always remember that "quitting is not an option"

8ur84uhrh398fh · 2019-03-13T12:54:29+00:00

I haven't been in this situation before. However, I have been in some bad places. The following helps.

1) Make a habit of the gym or a daily run.

2) Have a musical instrument someone is willing to loan you? Make a habit of practicing every day. You'll get good.

greyman0425 · 2019-03-13T16:19:38+00:00

The only sound advice the OP should get is from a lawyer, your unit chaplain and a psychologist.

I only advice I can give is from experience and observation, here goes troop:

Talk to your command, explain the situation.

Avoid drinking, then avoid women

Get a side hustle for extra cash. If your vehicle is nice enough driving for UBER or Lyft can earn you cash and allow you to deduct a % your vehicle expenses based on how much you use it for Uber (consult a tax attorney).

The OP should not pay for anything more than the child support. Anything payed for beyond that is considered a gift, it will not be credited towards child support or any thing in arrears. Any requests (demands) from the mother for the OP to pay for anything (shoes, braces, medical expenses) beyond child support should be documented and he should demand receipts. OP needs to keep proof regular support payments.

Document everything: visitation, condition of child's room, school issues, health issues, clothing etc...

Monitor all payments, when they can stop, who you have to notify. Just because the kid turns 18 the kid support liability may not end automatically unless you file the right paperwork. Automatic payments do not stop themselves.

If and when the money pressure dies down and time allows; the OP should volunteer at the school, sports clubs, scouts the kid is involved in so he can see the kid more without violating the divorce decree.

nunhgrader · 2019-03-13T19:19:52+00:00

Fight it out and you will eventually be tough as nails and pull through the long hall. Money is not nearly everything. Or, kick it and leave the country. Completely start over and check out another country.

throwaway_ftb · 2019-03-13T04:44:31+00:00

sorry man. with only $300 dollars per month for food and gas i dont think u can save any of that... my only suggestion is to not eat out at all to save money... i eat a fuji apple for breakfast everyday and it's enough to get to lunch.

Mechs2002 · 2019-03-13T05:34:06+00:00

Wait, what? Are you U.S. Military? What Branch? What pay grade?

How can you be military and be homeless? There is this big buliding called a barracks that you can get a room in, for free. Also meals at the defac, for reduced costs. Some more info is needed so that proper advice can be given, otherwise, only thing I can tell you is "embrace the suck".

Sparta_00 · 2019-03-13T16:21:51+00:00

You have serious red flags here man. Military won't let you become homeless and you can also ear in the galley/mess every night. 750$ a month leaves you with only 350$? An E-1 makes more than that monthly. You're broke probably for refusing to change some lifestyle habits. Time to sell you're probable mustang/Camaro/ whatever overpriced high interest pony car you bought and get a beater. I'm a veteran myself your post smells like shit.

Tercalerc · 2019-03-13T01:18:40+00:00

The advice is pay up or go to jail.

Title	Military Divorce
Author	BeastyWh1teGuy
Upvotes	91
Comments	58
Date	March 13, 2019 1:13 AM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MGTOW
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MGTOW/comments/b0fwgz/military_divorce/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MGTOW/military-divorce.499376 https://theredarchive.com/post/499376

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