Context:
Went on a long weekend trip with an expiring plate this past weekend. It was a free trip up the coast and she was driving so I figured why not, I’d get to see some friends I knew in the area. However, as you can probably guess, 3 days in close proximity with a girl you’re just fucking is WAY too much time. The trip was exhausting by the end of it but enlightening in providing clarity to EVERY PAST RELATIONSHIP where I was pursuing a woman with higher SMV and demonstrating classic BP behavior.
So I wanted to make a clear post breaking down all the bad behaviors we tend to perform as men with high interest and just how unattractive they are from the other side.
The Lessons:
If a girl has low interest (standoffish on dates, flaky, not that physically affectionate, on their phones etc. etc.)...
- Chasing her only makes it worse
I displayed all the above low interest behaviors during our weekend. I was funny and charming at times but when she would bring 90% energy to my 10, it would quickly get annoying and exhausting, so play it cool. If a girl backs off, don’t chase her. Ever. Don’t call. Don’t text. Let her come to you or let her walk.
- Indifference is everything
This one is simple but act like you don’t give af. That you could take it or leave it. Someone who displays high interest is in the weaker position because they’re feelings are clear. Let the girl do that. In the beginning set up dates and back off. If she says she’s busy tell her to hit you up when she’s free and leave it alone. Girls aren’t dumb. If they’re interested they will reach out. If not, move on.
- Accept that you may not get her or get her back and be okay with that
With high quality girls it’s easy to get caught up on them. They’re rare. But don’t. If you fucked it with a HB8+ let it go for good. If she reaches out tell her to come through for a drink and a chance to talk. No bars, no restaurants (that will weed out the flakes). On my trip with this girl a recurring thought was “I’m never doing this again” so understand if a girl has lost interest there’s VERY little you can do to get her back aside from walking away completely and letting her decide.
- Let her reach out and take your time getting back
Again, let a girl reach out. In my situation there was next to nothing this girl could do to get me to reach out to her in the future other than give me effortless sex. If a girl you really liked reaches back out, understand she just wants some easy dick. Make it easy, invite her over, but take your time getting back (4 hours to a day).
- Changing an impression is nearly impossible
It’s that simple. If you fucked up with a high quality girl, let it go. In my head, there’s little if anything this HB6 could do to get me to come around. Once I’ve lost interest it’s typically gone and unless she just got bad af all of a sudden (not happening) that fact isn’t changing. We are who we are, and are either compatible or not.
- Don’t overpursue, give them the space to reach out
Let them reach out. Can’t say this enough. No check in texts. No good mornings. No sending music or videos to check out. That’s some weak insecure shit. Leave them alone. It shows strength that you don’t care if you never talk again. They’ll think about you from time to time and if the impression you created before you fucked up was good enough, there’s a chance they MAY reach back out to confirm/test their last memory of you.
- Don’t try to be overly cutesy or goofy, it just makes you look pitiful
The HB6 is short. Below 5’ and I’m above 6’. I’m being comfortable around me, she’d do these goofy little short things like struggle to get up on chairs or in tall cars. She thought it was cute. It wasn’t. It just looked pathetic and unattractive and made me think “what the fuck am I doing with this chick?”
Don’t be goofy fellas. Seriously. It never works. Maintain frame always and be charming funny (talk shit about her in a funny way).
- Don’t show weakness in the early stages (be stress free and fun)
Don’t complain about the dating world. Don’t complain about your weaknesses and insecurities. No self deprecating humor. Just shut the fuck up and be stress free and fun.
- Don’t yap all the time (be comfortable in silence)
Self explanatory. Shut the fuck and speak when asking a question or answering one. And be quick about it. No one likes to listen but everyone loves to speak. Recognize this and flip the script.
- Don’t let a girl walk all over you. It’ll kill all attraction.
I treated this girl like shit 10% of this weekend. Got mad, called her out, teased her. I did it because I got annoyed and she laughed it all off. I lost even more respect. Dont let your girl walk on you fellas. It will only make things much, much worse.
- You can’t talk someone into liking you. They either do or they don’t
Be yourself. Just keep it restrained in the beginning. Let the walls come down slowly. If a girl doesn’t like you, you can’t convince her. There’s literally NOTHING you can do. So let it go and rest easy that you did all you could and WALK AWAY.
TLDR: Don’t be annoying or weak with women. It’ll kill attraction and once it’s gone good luck getting it back. You won’t. Cut your losses, move on, and be cool.
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