Hello everyone,

I posted here before and still read this reddit from time to time. But I find that I am unable to move forward with my life. I went through the stereotypical got cheated on and treated like garbage after doing a lot of a woman thing last year. It took me almost the entire year to get over it(This happened last valentines day of all days) and I thought I was finally getting better. As I posted here before though, I have now become acutely aware of the way women behave and how much they get away with.

I spoke to my father about this(went through 3 divorces) and he told me never to compare myself to women and that it was just the way of the world since time immemorial that women are babied into adulthood and that we as men won't ever be looked at as worth anything if we aren't doing. He also told me that love wasn't real and that whether it was himself, other men or me; that it's always well and good until you fall ill, have financial trouble or she just gets bored. And that I should do the bare minimum but never throw my heart into a girl again because "if you aren't providing social or financial leverage for most women, they're gone because other men are always hitting on them and very few women will say no to a better offer.". This was a painful conversation and he basically said a bunch of mgtow stuff without even knowing about it.

I've struggled to figure out what to do, but have continually been having my hopes killed over and over again. I talked about a co-worker of mine that had gotten a girl we worked with to dump her bf and sleep around with him, but refuses to date her. They will hang out and flirt at work, and he tells me that he still sleeps with her along with a few other women. This gutted me because I knew her ex and he was a good guy, six years together! But she was happy being one of this guys sex partners rather than be committed to her bf. The worst part is this guy started sleeping with another girl at work, these two both know about eachother/the other girls and don't say anything. Now I'm angry out of jealousy in part because I liked this girl, she rejected me; but is fine hooking up with this guy.

It's things like this amongst others that has shown me that the 80/20 rule is a thing and not a joke. I always used to wonder how it was that women were fine being "the other woman" and all that, why harems existed in the past for men and not women, etc. And I realized it comes down to what my father and other mgtows say; "if you've got financial or social clout; all propriety and demands expected of other men goes out the window". I just don't know what to do anymore, I try to avoid these things; but real life keeps showing me what a joke "love" is. I spent my whole life(28 now) looking forward to having a family and raising good children/passing on knowledge. Now I look at how it all works; most guys have to ask out tons of women and by the time they get a yes; their self esteem is shot and they are just happy to have a yes from someone. Invariably it goes to shit and the man gets blamed for everything after pouring in tons of time and money.

And I look at the women around me, all into hookups, one night stands, tinder, drinking, partying and yet expect to be wined and dined by guys that ask them out. The same woman that I have to walk up to, ask out, get a yes, take her out, treat her well, respect and try to build something with...is the same woman that has more than likely met some guy in a bar and fucked him the same night because he's "cute". So what exactly does the average man get in all of this? No wonder women treat us like trash and turn away so many decent men. They simply look at us like utilities because ironically in trying to treat them well, we are saying that we're not as good or better than them. That's why they'll fuck random men that give them tingles, do all kind of sex acts, but then marry or get into a ltr with average men and give them average while demanding more.

So tl;dr: I'm angry. I've been really angry for a long time and while I try to stifle it, deal with it through therapy and Church; none of it has helped. I am still so unbelievably angry about what happened and after all that I did. I read or talk to other decent men and hear the exact same stuff and I just want to cry. I don't get it. Why are we punished for trying to be decent upstanding people?