I'm looking for an opinion. So my gf and I are separating. I own the house so she is having to move everything out of the house. She will do anything to make sure our two toddlers goes with her. I am the only one working a full time job, paying the mortgage and the utility bill. I also come home to have to cook dinner, feed pretty much everyone. Clean the kitchen, do the dishes, bathing the kids, and watching them in the evening so she can do her part time stay at home work and often times have to put them to bed too. Lately I've been doing the laundry too. I've done vast majority of middle of the night feedings for both over the last 2 years (Irish twins). I also get up early and wash the kids dishes and make bottles (except for a few things I was running late to work).
She is horrible with money and doesn't have a lot. Lately has been asking me for money to help cover things. So I'll have to give extra in support to compensate for things she's paid for around the house.
Legally she still gets support from her ex-husband and working part time teaching online courses for college brings in more then I do. If this support comes up in court it could be harmful for both of us. But still asks me for money to help cover bills in her name.
If I got custody the kids could get on my company health plan.
Would it be wrong for me to seek full custody, knowing that it could put her in a Financial hole?
She also plans to move 270 miles away to be closer to her family and potential jobs.
My family is near me and more than willing to watch the kids during my work time.
Edit: GF has threatened to lie in court by saying that I (biological father) molest my two year old daughter. I have this on audio recording.
Edit 2: I made a comment about the next door neighbor. "If you don't put out maybe she will" type of comment about a year ago. I apologized for making it. But she never forgiven me. Now accusing me of cheating with the lady next door. I see her if she looks at me I say hello and that's about it.
All of this is coming to pass because I told her I didn't wish to marry anyone... ever...
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try to get full custody, if you can manage it. as others have pointed out, this moving sounds a lot like attempted parental alienation. get a lawyer — the planned move can possibly be blocked in court if you end up sharing custody (depending on the local legislation)
as for her being poor during the separation period — I don’t know the rules in your jurisdiction, but when me and my wife separated a lawyer told me that all shared assets (including shared accounts) are essentially off limits to both parties, and any charges done to said accounts need to be compensated when the final verdict comes. agreed support to child is probably ok, but you may request receipts to validate.
on the positive side, you are no longer responsible for any new debt that she takes after the divorce papers are in (at least in my jurisdiction)
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