Plenty of sex with wife but low quality, what am I doing wrong?

ubershoop · 2013-08-07T10:50:27+00:00

Without knowing the inner workings of your relationship, it's hard to say, but I assume she's either not feeling connected to you or she's not feeling attracted to you or she's not feeling attractive period. What's your gut read?

Depending which of those it is, you would need to re-calibrate the relationship to either re-attract her or re-connect with her. Basically creating attraction or comfort similar to the way you would with any new woman.

bigyellowtwinki · 2013-08-07T14:50:01+00:00

Maybe you are bad at sex? Try some foreplay to get her turned on.

roe_ · 2013-08-07T14:00:52+00:00

On the MMSL forums, the standard line is "eliminate medical first."

So... has she had her testosterone levels checked?

ubershoop · 2013-08-07T10:17:35+00:00

Forgot to mention, I'm TRP all the time now.

TRPsubmitter · 2013-08-07T12:31:39+00:00

Ask her questions like "Who does this pussy belong to?". Make her say "you" before you keep on going.

From missionary, pull out and then put your dick in her face while straddling her. Get her to suck it. If she balks then just say "suck it". If she still balks, don't force it in. Without ANY words, just quickly and forcefully turn her on her stomach and angry fuck her from behind for about 5 min. She needs to be screaming and really into it. Then turn her back over and stick your dick in her face again. No words. Just put it 99% of the way there and let her go the final 1% to start sucking it. She will have definitely gotten the message that this is what you want. And your assertiveness should work.

This strategy can work with other stuff....like tell her to ride you and grind you. If she isn't doing a good job or can obviously go harder, then do NOT force her to ride harder by grabbing her hips. Instead, with NO words, turn her over on all fours and angry fuck her for 2-3 min. Then go back to cowgirl and say "are you ready to ride me hard this time? Show me".

Just be aggressive in bed...basically...but with a kind of "animal trainer" mentality.

ubershoop · 2013-08-07T10:21:22+00:00

How's your dirty talk?

You should try getting her into that sub headspace.

Affirmations are a good way to start, so things like: "You like that dick fucking you, don't you?"

Tyrien · 2013-08-07T21:20:07+00:00

what am I doing wrong?

Not talking to her about it.

sharksonsharks · 2013-08-07T13:51:48+00:00

The advice on this thread so far is crap. Changing what you do so suddenly without discussing it and getting consent first is absolutely the worst thing you can do. If anything, it'll destroy any trust you have between you and make her grow to resent you. Even sexual ultimatums and denial can be borderline abusive, full blown abusive without consent. Do you want to take that risk? Destroy your marriage for the possibility of "better sex"?

Honestly have you ever talked to her about any of this? Throw out the possibility of her having a more active role in bed. No need to be all alpha about it or reduce her to a wild animal who needs to be "tamed", just treat her like a human being with her own damn choices. Mustering up the courage to talk candidly to her is also alpha as fuck.

I know the goal of this sub is to have more higher quality sex, but you need to realize that it can't be your only goal. Your marriage should not revolve simply around your sexlife; realize that there are other factors keeping you two together. There's a time being alpha can be acceptable, and there are times when it's just plain stupid.

Preyes · 2013-08-07T14:10:54+00:00

Have you tried talking to her about it? Maybe she has some fantasies which she hasn't expressed to you before.

favours_of_the_moon · 2013-08-07T20:51:41+00:00

Press her emotional buttons.

Feel around for the boundary. She's got something inside that she's not expressing. Make it come out!

2013-08-07T11:31:28+00:00

100%, you just need to start fucking her like she's the dirtiest whore in existence. pull her hair, shove her face into the pillow, whispers in the ear, make her beg, etc.

ubershoop · 2013-08-07T13:39:35+00:00

[permanently deleted]

iggybdawg · 2013-08-07T19:46:34+00:00

Are you me?

abcd_z · 2013-08-07T15:09:31+00:00

If she isn't giving you enjoyable sex, you should probably start looking elsewhere. Cheat on her, or flat-out tell her that you're going to see other women, or file for divorce and end the relationship.

None of these are great options, but they all end with you getting more enjoyable sex than what you currently have.

Title	Plenty of sex with wife but low quality, what am I doing wrong?
Author	ubershoop
Upvotes	18
Comments	64
Date	August 7, 2013 10:16 AM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/1jvi4o/plenty_of_sex_with_wife_but_low_quality_what_am_i/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/plenty-of-sex-with-wife-but-low-quality-what-am-i.6135 https://theredarchive.com/post/6135

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