Military Spouse Culture/The Pussification of the Military

Paid_Internet_Troll · 2016-10-22T15:20:35+00:00

What you're describing isn't new, isn't limited to the U.S. military, and isn't really an example of feminization.

The British military, starting in the early 1800s, had/has the same sort of situation in officer country.

It's actually a system of total social control of officers and thier families, making sure that they're basically isolated/insulated from non-military social life, as well as enacting strong social bonds to act as a brake on hypergamy among the officers' wives.

[deleted] · 2016-10-22T16:38:32+00:00

I'm just now finishing my 8th year of active duty in the Air Force and I know EXACTLY what you're talking about. The spouse groups on facebook do nothing but constantly bitch and complain as if their opinions have merit. I think the NCO's and officers really get fed up dealing with spouse drama but are forced to remain silent most of the time because feelz. They've definitely noticed the trends of cheating wives and the problems these women bring to the work centers when everyone gets involved with everyone else.

I went through a bad phase of alcoholism shortly after turning 21. My supervisors put me in the Air Force's version of AA because of it. Almost every single one of the other guys in that AA group claimed to have been drinking heavily due to relationship issues. Then it dawned on me. Cheating wives are a norm now...fuck.

DouglasPR · 2016-10-22T19:38:55+00:00

Other bad thing of this: you trust a guy, tell him something (not just to brag but sometimes to unplug his head from his ass), about RP or a plate or whatever. The poor beta goes right to his wife or gf and spills the beans. Presto! She tells everybody else and you're tinted forever in that group/corporation/unit.

nous_defions · 2016-10-22T18:38:16+00:00

The military doesn't want you to be single. Once you start a family in the military it is extremely difficult to get out because the benefits are unmatched. This results in service members working harder so they don't get released.

This is a large part of why I'm getting out in 6 months after almost 10 years. I'm tired of picking up the slack for guys who are on paternal leave for their yearly baby, doing the details because my free time means nothing apparently, and generally being treated like a less responsible soldier even though I out perform my peers. In the civilian world, you make more money when you put in longer hours and do better work in general.

clearedmycookies · 2016-10-22T19:44:39+00:00

This really isn't a women thing as much as a spouse thing.. Yes in general men are the majority in the military hence the spouse is most likely a woman..

Yet these same programs would still be around if women was the majority in service and men were the spouse..

The original problem that made this program come into effect is the fact that most spouses have a hard time finding a job unless they have some real skill.. Relocating every couple of years doesn't help them either..

Eventually the spouse realizes they either need to break out and divorce to live their own life, hence the divorce rate for military is super high.. (don't matter what sex it is). This problem gets compounded by the fact that divorce hurts financially and that will ultimately hurt morale of staying in the military..

In order to eliviate that, they created the program, to make spouses feel important.

I ain't saying it's right, but it's certainly not a female thing as much as it's a spouse thing..

JackGetsIt · 2016-10-22T16:12:07+00:00

What's yours is mine, what's mine is mine.

IdleBread · 2016-10-23T01:37:48+00:00

There is an old saying in Retention: "Recruit a soldier, and retain a family." If the military makes the spouse happy and (typically) she wants to stay in, its easier to get soldier to re-enlist. It's easy to give her an unpaid job and a sense of fulfillment. A "working" woman isn't complaining about her husbands late hours. Because "she understands the sacrifices." I say that only half sarcastically.

As you know spouses have a built-in network to rely on upon soldiers deployment. This can cut down on spousal depression during deployment. Its possible the idea is to build a happy family as a backbone for soldier. Vet suicide is very high so its good to have a network to reach out to dealing with post-deployment.

Some spouses enjoy the networks. Some don't. And that is ok. I didn't see it affect ranks on officer side until LTC. Hell, we had a Captains wife get drunk at a bar and do a strip tease. He made Major a few months later.

That's my take. I retired after 18 years in Army.

ETA: Good luck in your career! (and formatting)

Equada · 2016-10-23T02:22:02+00:00

Funny, for the longest time, my (ex)wife knew more about my postings/deployments/changes at work than I did. Usually, I'd hear about this stuff about 1-2 weeks first through the wive's network than through my own COC.

I'm with you that I push against it as well, but I don't think it's feminization as much as it's dealing with the idea that if the wives are pissed, the member's not happy too. If they can get spousal buy-in and get them waving the flag just as strongly, then they can deploy you and post you anywhere without having to worry too much about the grief the spouse at home might give.

Having said that, I worked with a guy who made it a sport to steal the nametag patches of the guys whose wives he'd nailed that weekend...that story there was enough to make me want to keep the (ex)wife from the military family.

THEDICKDEALER · 2016-10-22T17:38:52+00:00

Dude I noticed that sort of thing when I was in. At first it becomes annoying,then insufferable and then your counting the days until your out!

Conceited-Monkey · 2016-10-22T18:02:17+00:00

The logic is if the woman is integrated as part of a social circle of other military wives, it will keep Chad away and the military man will be more functional with less drama at home. It is a nice theory. On the down side, your wife will start seeing herself as part of the military and your career issues will become her issues too.

[deleted] · 2016-10-22T18:58:11+00:00

I was walking to the PX 20 years ago and I remember some bitch in a car stopped and yelled out the window "do you see that blue sticker on the windshield? You better salute me or your CO will have he'll to pay!". Turnd out to be some Colonels wife.

LordThunderbolt · 2016-10-23T16:13:07+00:00

Lol you fucked up when you decided to hand over your balls to your girl and the government as a married member of the military.

SecretTrumpFan · 2016-10-23T01:54:14+00:00

Officer spouse here. I have both been super involved and hardly involved. It depends where I have lived, what is going on in my life at the time (new baby, deployment, timing of these things, etc) really factors into my involvement.

Realize this...if your wife moves around the world with you, she likely wants to seek friendships. You have a job as you move, and hence are around other adults. Adult interaction is really an exciting thing. The spouse needs to find a new job if the spouse works and if the spouse does not is actually stuck home trying to make new friends. I have worked and am now a stay at home mom. Being active in some kind of community is how you meet people. Community is a good thing. It isn't like the average military spouse lives near family or lifelong friends. They move. Frequently. I have been dropped off in foreign countries with a kid, newborn and dog, and my husband deployed immediately. I got involved in the community, our kids became friends, we ate dinner together and helped each other when needed.

I have also seen a spouse lose her baby in her third trimester while her husband was deployed. Thank goodness as she had a community to be there for her. I have had a close friend who got a knock on the door and was notified her husband was KIA. Thank goodness she had close friends who were there for her.

I am sorry, but I am really astonished you would post this as a service member.

Title	Military Spouse Culture/The Pussification of the Military
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	27
Comments	16
Date	October 22, 2016 3:01 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/58th45/military_spouse_culturethe_pussification_of_the/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/military-spouse-culturethe-pussification-of-the.63857 https://theredarchive.com/post/63857

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