So I'm in a rough spot and could use some advice.

My boyfriend (28) and I (26) were together for two years, then we kinda broke up when we graduated college and he got a job on the other side of the country, we have been back together for over a year now and neither of us really dated anyone in the time we were apart. The sex is great, I love him, I love having sex with him... but then I feel guilty because we aren't married. And the guilt is pretty intense, so then I start to hate myself and that leads to me feeling super depressed because I know what I'm doing is wrong but I'm doing it anyway and what excuse do I have? None. I'm just weak horrible person.

So I could stop, but then I'm frustrated because I have a really high sex drive and it's almost easier to not be around him at all than to be around him and not be able to sleep with him. We have talked about marriage, we both want this to go there, but he isn't ready yet due to things he's trying to accomplish both in his personal life and his career. He wants to pay off his house, rent it out, buy another one that we would live in, he needs to study for these exams to get his professional engineering certificate which is a really big deal and requires a lot of time, so we are talking about marriage in 3ish years.

I can't sleep with him anymore, it makes me hate myself. I don't want him to think it has anything to do with my love or attraction to him though, or even worse, that this is some sort of manipulation to try to get him to marry me now. I understand why he want's to wait and I respect that. Breaking up isn't really an option, I don't think he would leave me for saying that I wanted to wait, he quit his job and moved across the country to be with me, so he's shown that he's serious. And in general he likes that I'm religious, he's not in the same place that I am, his faith is something he is working on, but he definitely never holds my convictions against me.

Has anyone else dealt with anything like this? How would you approach this subject? Maybe this is all my fault to begin with, I held out for so long... I didn't sleep with him until we were a year into our relationship when we were in college, maybe if I was still a virgin this wouldn't be so hard. But now it's not me saying "I can't do that," it's me saying "I won't do that ANYMORE."

I don't know, I'm screwed either way to some extent. Either I'm frustrated because I can't fuck my boyfriend who I love and am super attracted to, or I'm depressed and hate myself because I am fucking my boyfriend. Fuck.

UPDATE: I have been watching the comments. I've been pretty busy, sorry for not getting more involved. I have been maintaining the status quo and I suppose I will continue to do that.