On nice guys finishing last

ssilBetulosbA · 2020-07-01T02:23:34+00:00

Ok let me explain - what are usually called nice guys are men that are needy and clingy, that are not really kind and nice, they are just acting that way in order to get sex and get laid.

Being genuinely nice and loving means also being loving towards yourself. If you love yourself and realize you don't need sex or women to be internally fulfilled, you can love women freely and not be needy or clingy.

In fact the only way to be "nice" or rather, to be loving and kind, is to not need the other person, to realize you don't need their approval to be whole or OK, or enough. Then, when you realize you are enough, you can be genuinely kind and loving - and that's very attractive.

Most assholes aren't needy or clingy, that's why they get laid. But you can be genuinely loving and kind and get laid even more so.

Yesm3can · 2020-06-30T19:22:56+00:00

How do you explain men who ended up with wives who cheated on them, making them raising kids that were not their own without them knowing, and then alleniate them from their own children after divorce?

Are these men knowingly chose bad women over nice women (remember that crazy - hot scale?), or are men so feeble that they can easily baited and switched? Or maybe this: Men and women in relationship often found out too late that their partners are shit? And therefore, they can only learn from the experience and chose better next time?

Inareskai · 2020-06-30T20:41:25+00:00

Pro-tip: don't get your ideas about how the world works from reddit.

The person I dated before my fiancé was nice enough. He was never outwardly rude to me or particularly nasty - he certainly wasn't a 'bad' guy or an asshole. We were both teenagers and definitely not our best selves, but I wouldn't say he was any worse (or better) than any other guy at that age. We just had very different life goals and values, so it was never going to work out long term.

There you go, he was a nice guy (in the non-'TM' way) but our views on the world were too dissimilar for it to work out - which is kind of why people date, to find the right person to be with. People (men and women) are going to make mistakes along the way, but it's not some pernicious plot or deep meaningful thing that women have relationships with guys they end up realising weren't great? It's not like these guys attracted these women by being dicks - they were probably lovely and then turned out to be horrible partners. Such is life, you move on and find someone else, ideally having learnt some things about yourself.

triavatar · 2020-07-01T15:06:18+00:00

[deleted]

Classic_Touch · 2020-07-01T16:28:49+00:00

Nice men always win at the end of the day. I won't even be "friends" with assholes now. Or even do one nighters. Fuck them

Beginning_Tea · 2020-06-30T18:59:51+00:00

Confirmation bias, tbqh. Most people do not look at their ex's as "nice people". Some of my friends who got dumped by women remember them as heartless, thots, manipulative, evil, sluts, and etc, but when they were dating them I never heard such words. The current guy they are dating is a "nice guy" once he dumps them, then he is no longer a "nice guy". Everyone is biased.

CountVP · 2020-07-01T01:03:19+00:00

Man sometimes i think this sub is all redpill members trolling. My only evidence to the contrary is that i'm on the top posts of the month with a meagre 99 ups.

Seriously not having boundaries in a relationship is wrong, this is common sense. Of fucking course she is gonna walk all over you. If you dont respect yourself, how will anyone ??

Doesn't mean the whole redpill cult is right about all the other bullshit they expouse. The entire premise of the ideology is that men and women behave entirely alike GORILLAS, a species that diverged from ours 10 million years ago.

Not sure why i even bother writing this, maybe hoping some young impressionable dude out there reads this and avoids the pain of being a redpill bitch, how knows?? If i saved one life thats enough....

ProfessorToker · 2020-07-03T03:13:21+00:00

When people are in their teens and sometimes 20s their relationships are about developing their social identity and less about pair bonding.

medlabunicorn · 2020-06-30T18:32:18+00:00

If by, ‘finish last,’ you mean, ‘get the girl in the end, and become the father of her children,’ absolutely. If you mean, ‘have no-strings or bad-relationship sex with naive young women from bad homes,’ not so much.

Or maybe you meant ‘Nice Guys (TM) as opposed to nice guys? Because every one of those assholes probably self-identifies as a Nice Guy.

Title	On nice guys finishing last
Author	2ndacctacct
Upvotes	3
Comments	67
Date	June 30, 2020 6:22 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/hisytf/on_nice_guys_finishing_last/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/on-nice-guys-finishing-last.702707 https://theredarchive.com/post/702707

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