Grew up hoping I could “prove myself” to guys who weren’t already attracted to me

suspended_animation_ · 2020-07-26T00:34:53+00:00

This hurt my heart, but it's the truth..

thaiteabbys · 2020-07-26T04:22:24+00:00

Ohhh man. I had my fair share of this in middle school and high school. When I practically left my high school in my junior year for dual enrollment, I realized what an idiot I was back in those times. Like you said, I gave them gifts, did things for them, interact and talk with them, and even brought them Asian food (the dude I liked at the time was interested in Travel, cultures, and different food). I don’t like the word simp nor do I like to use; but dang , I was a girl simp.

Funny thing is the last two guys I liked , liked me too. But we were young and religious so nothing ever came out. One of them turned out to be gay and came out in high school. But one of them loves music (not the gay guy, he’s more of an artistic dude , super good at art) and has played ever since he was little, he played a song for me in my favorite movie in band class (when I was in band) and was blushing while he was playing it. I thought it was super sweet, probably the sweetest thing a guy has done for me. He knew I loved the movie. But those times are over and there’s not many good high school guys like them. They’re nice and good guys, with passions and hobbies.

The guys that did like me (but I didn’t like them) thought I was cute and that was it. But yeah, there’s absolutely no point in proving yourself to guys. Doing the most I should say. It’s wasted time, effort, and energy. If the guy likes you, he will make that clear and should make the effort to chase you.

2020-07-26T13:53:40+00:00

This is so true, another messed up consequence is that a guy can find a woman incredibly annoying and dislike her personality, but could still be physically and sexually attracted to her. If he's deranged enough, he'll pretend to like her to get what he wants then throw her away like trash.

That's why it's super important to vet before having sex or doing anything intimate.

2020-07-26T14:14:57+00:00

Happened with my most recent ex, and I was waaaaay to old to be doing that. Looking back, what part of “I’m not attracted to you in that way” did I not understand? But hell no, let’s keep going shall we? 🙄Then he falls for me out of desperation what followed was the most emotionally disastrous year of my life. Fool’s paradise as my wise grandma would have said it.

nosynobody · 2020-07-26T15:40:22+00:00

Pretty much. I used to have a major crush in high school to this guy who was my friend. He wasn't even good looking but completely avoided me when he found out that I had crush on him. We had similar hobies and interests and would have made a good couple. Shortly after I was asked out by someone better

Sreshme · 2020-07-26T15:04:52+00:00

Took me so long to understand that. Thanks to FDS. Girls don’t be a pickme in the “hope” that he will like for you and your considerate thoughts.

Chonkygrill · 2020-07-26T11:33:46+00:00

Oh no this hurts, how much time have I wasted 😬

necro_wafers · 2020-07-26T17:18:57+00:00

I JUST HAD AN EPIPHANY ABOUT MY LAST RELATIONSHIP. Wow, what a break through. 😲

OverAcanthopterygii5 · 2020-07-26T13:11:50+00:00

That's not compleatly true, only HVM won't change attraction - LVM can develop that because they lack options

Title	Grew up hoping I could “prove myself” to guys who weren’t already attracted to me
Author	livinlikelarry00
Upvotes	189
Comments	14
Date	July 25, 2020 11:36 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/hxwlyy/grew_up_hoping_i_could_prove_myself_to_guys_who/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/grew-up-hoping-i-could-prove-myself-to-guys-who.718189 https://theredarchive.com/post/718189

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