My dilemma

zeroicemaze · 2021-02-15T23:51:39+00:00

what your doing is stupid asf and playing the field if your even thinking about cheating ditch the relationship and move on and let her meet someone who will actually want something with her long term.

cunningcaring · 2021-02-15T23:06:53+00:00

Simple life fact: you can't have it all. Make you decision, live with the consequences.

cuicksilver · 2021-02-16T03:24:29+00:00

You’re not in a good place in life to have a monogamous relationship. Let her go. It will only end badly.

If you’re still torn, make a few sessions with a therapist to see why you would seriously consider betraying someone you think you love.

Cheating on a partner also makes it harder for others who don’t cheat to earn trust in relationships.

Yesm3can · 2021-02-16T04:58:57+00:00

It amazes me how many RPs are harping about about AWALT dem hoes!!! It just ur turn brah!! and deep inside ended up wanting both monogamy and a harem themselves.

As if they are projecting what they want (but mostly can't get) to others.

As for OP, time and place. It is ok to want to be a family man and all, but if you still want to have fun (and it is ok), then the time is not yet now.

Don't do the whole what if I cannot find a woman as great as my GF now? Stop that, because you are just keeping the both of you hostages. She will land on her feet just fine and you are going to do the same.

So think about it and make your choice.

RedPillDetox · 2021-02-16T11:42:46+00:00

Lmao, imagine if a girl posted something in the lines of "i want to fuck someone else but i still want to be with him". It would easily get over 100 comments from TRP dudes and incels, be shared into oblivion in every sub, inspire dozens of blog entries about this "red pill" confirming "female nature" and their "dualistic mating strategy"...

Anyway...

You're offtopic here, but to answer your question, it's all about maturity. Part of being mature is accepting responsibility and not having everything you want in life. Only childish people want to have it all. So yeah, you either sacrifice "young pussy wanting your D" for the sake of your relationship or you sacrifice your relationship for the sake of "young pussy". If you cheat, you're doing it at the expense of your own integrity and will feel like trash if you have any sort of moral compass. Which i think you do otherwise you wouldn't post this and would have just cheated already. Anyway, you can't have it all. That's life for you.

preredditor · 2021-02-16T03:30:25+00:00

I will never and haven’t even considered cheating in a way of developing a romantic relationship on the side, I’m only talking one-time just for the sexual thrill of it and because I’m young and I can see women want my D, shit is very tempting

You answered yourself. Don't be monogamous and just break up.

cvntcvntcvnt · 2021-02-16T05:53:52+00:00

You’re being a dumb dumb here fam. If you’re not ready to tough out having sex with other people while in a MONOGAMOUS relationship, you’re just not there yet my guy.

What are you looking for advice on anyway? Are you looking for someone to say “yeah bro, it’s not cheating if emotions aren’t involved”?? You either stay with her and just her, or you let her go and do your own thing. There’s no way around that

zokahlo · 2021-02-16T15:00:29+00:00

Multiple things here dude:

Communication: it sounds like the person you’re with continues to have a tremendously positive effect on your life,and would continue to if you stayed with them. Trust will be the core of any future communication, and you need to communicate where you are in your own thoughts. If you want to be able to fuck around with other people, then tell her! She may be open to that but may want time and understanding first. She may want the same thing, but she has to be the one to tell you either way.

Non-monogamous relationships: as you’ve mentioned in other comments, it sounds like you want purely NSA sexual encounters with other women separately from your current partner because you think that’s a lesser form of cheating; cheating is cheating, and the way to keep from doing that is (again) communication with your partner. It’s not cheating if she’s on board with you doing that, but you’re fooling yourself if you think the only form to hurt her is to “emotionally cheat.”

Even in a purely sexual relationship there are ways to hurt your partner. STIs are tricky conditions that can be passed on even if you where a condom. HPV, Syphilis, Herpes, Mono, etc can all be passed on without necessarily showing symptoms. You’ll need to talk about boundaries, getting tested regularly, what you can both agree on as acceptable to do with others and whatever else you’ll both need to feel comfortable in an open relationship.

As you’ve probably already thought, just bring the up to her can be hurtful. You need to be ready for multiple scenarios: - She’s fully on board and wants you to have positive sexual experiences - She fully in board and also wants to have her own fun by herself because you both want to be more sexually active - She’s a little uncomfortable but is willing to talk about it - She’s uncomfortable and isn’t open to that option, but could be open to doing other things/getting more adventurous with you. - She’s uncomfortable and shuts down in the conversation - She is not open to that option in the slightest - She is not open to that option and feels hurt by the conversation and leaves you

That’s a hella reductive list of scenarios, and there are many more nuances to consider. The main things as you keep navigating this:

Respect her enough to have this conversation with her if it’s making you consider leaving her. She has as much as say in this relationship as you do. Trust her enough with your vulnerability to be open about what you want.

And lastly, apply that same logic to her; if this script were turned around, would you be open to her bringing this up with you?

I say this all as I am currently in an open relationship that has worked well.

GeorgeWashingtonKing · 2021-02-21T22:55:53+00:00

I'm on the same boat bro. Same age as you and exact same dilemma. I think it's our age honestly. Apparently the want to fuck hoes never goes away, it's just something we gotta deal with. We're wired as men to wanna fuck a lot

Title	My dilemma
Author	kickbackgang
Upvotes	3
Comments	29
Date	February 15, 2021 10:37 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/lkp3za/my_dilemma/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/my-dilemma.741087 https://theredarchive.com/post/741087

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