How to transition from friends to kissing

RichieFinn · 2016-10-07T14:49:19+00:00

There is this girl who has been my friend for the past year

this isnt going to end well.

iHeartCapitalism · 2016-10-07T15:20:38+00:00

Telling a girl you like her and want her to be your girlfriend only works in 6th grade.

If I was in your situation, I'd either look to take her to some activity where there can be close contact (bouldering, ice skating, mini-gold (if you can teach her)), or simply take her out to a club (I'd personally go for this).

In my opinion, lunch doesn't give you many chances to escalate things. You can't just go up to her and kiss her, you need to build tension first.

The best way to build tension is in a place where it's expected you'll be touching (say, dancing at a club). A place where the atmosphere is more flirty (club), and a place where the main goal is to let go and have fun.

Ofc. you can replace 'club' with 'bar', but same idea.

Yashugan00 · 2016-10-07T14:58:46+00:00

Start doing basic kino. Women are super atuned to notice. Monte Carlo.

2 points. Be aware of the Ladder Theory. This works against you. Generally, the more she knows you the less sexual attraction. You're already giving her all the attention, commitment and security she needs. (Esp if you listen to all her woes, you're the 'emotional tampon'

if you try to break out of orbit, she might suddenly become confused, possibly excited. Your only window for this is when she is NOT ovulating as she will get a craving for alpha ad boy cock when she is.

Show a more masculine side. Go hot and cold and sprinkle in some competition. (Invent a girl you like other than her) don't be overt about this and don't talk about feelings with her.

Get a more active date than dinner (it's so provider type and she's too young to neeeeed that )

idgaf- · 2016-10-07T15:34:47+00:00

The more you want it, the more desperate and needy you will come off as.

The fear of escalating is closely linked to the fear of losing her.

Talk to other girls so you have a backup and you will be less afraid of losing her. Know that even if she rejects you, your life will be just fine.

Best thing to do during the date: be genuinely happy and enjoying the moment. The more natural your enjoyment, the more natural your conversation. Have good eye contact and you will know whether she is into you. Listen when she is talking. Don't be afraid to touch her.

Don't rush for the kiss, it's completely unnecessary. She's down to kiss if her head tends to linger in your direction in general or during pauses.

There's no micro strategy that you can implement that will guarantee success. You are who you are. Be bold, use this chance to attack your fear. When she rejects you, use it for motivation in all other aspects of life.

jb_trp · 2016-10-07T15:46:25+00:00

You're so young and inexperienced. Don't sweat it, you'll have lots of time to learn game and attract girls. Let's just start with the obvious: This isn't going to end in happily ever after. Sure, you might kiss her, and maybe date her, but eventually it's going to end and you have to be OK with that.

First thing, you need to stop being awkward and shy. It's a turn off. Confidence is key. You'll gain that with experience.

Being friends first and then trying to have a romantic relationship with a girl is a horrible strategy. But, you might as well try. You'll go for it, and she'll either reject you or she won't. You have to be okay with both outcomes.

Lunch date is a horrible idea. Next time, ask her to get a beer or a drink, then try to kiss her goodnight. Just say to her, "Come here" and lean in to kiss you. She'll probably say no from how you're describing everything, but if you want to try... You might as well.

Do not just come out and say that you really like her and want to be more than just friends. You have to show her with your actions. Your only chance is that this girl is as awkward and shy as you and is ready for a guy to be sexual/romantic with her (like, maybe she's on your level?).

Officer_Dick_Johnson · 2016-10-07T14:39:43+00:00

Movie and drinks (preferably your place). Say it's just you two, she'll get the idea.

If she says 'yes', she's game, if 'no' you have to (for your own sake) forget her (well at least stop contact until she initiates).

nightmancommeth · 2016-10-07T15:58:19+00:00

Lunch date is useless. Thats what friends do. Alcohol needs to be involved to kill any awkwardness for this to work. A club works well since you can smash a few drinks and dance/grind em.

[deleted] · 2016-10-07T16:16:51+00:00

Don't do this at a lunch date.

Ask her out on an evening date where you go to a museum or out walking and looking at shit or something. At the end of the evening, move in for the kiss.

If she doesn't agree to the evening date, move on. she isn't interested.

if at the end of the evening date you move in for the kiss and she says no or turns away or does anything other than enthusiastically kisses you, move on. She's not interested.

By the way, you and she aren't really friends. You're attracted to her sexually and have been orbiting her, hoping she will see how attracted you are. Unless the object of your desire is a complete moron, she is fully aware of how attracted you are to her. And she is not attracted to you. If she was attracted to you, she is not now.

You need to be prepared to lose the "friendship" over this. If you're not prepared to do that, then don't do anything I suggested, and keep orbiting her in your world of frustration.

deci-mator · 2016-10-07T18:23:04+00:00

You have alot to change. Your mind set is very toxic. Hoes can smell it miles away. If you thinking that you are unattractive and all that (in your mind). It will reflect on the outside in terms of your body language and behavior. If you go in knowing you are the shit and this girl wants to suck your dick. She will shit test you in order to categorize your authenticity. But once passed , everything is a breeze for you. However with tjis girl you like, you've been friends for some time. She knows that beta in you. That orbiter in you. So you really have to ask yourself if the hustle of changing her mindset is worth it. Or if it's easier to start a fresh with different plates.

1v1mebruh · 2016-10-08T00:23:31+00:00

Advice? Go out and get some real pussy.

You have oneitis for this bitch because you have a small friend group and haven't interacted positively with many attractive girls in your life so now you're picking what you perceive to be your easiest option and trying to make it work.

Focus on yourself instead and go talk to other chicks. Trust me. You'll have a way sicker life.

rpisnotpua · 2016-10-08T05:15:09+00:00

you don't.

you either fit into the "friends" box, or the "kissable" box. you don't switch boxes.

Title	How to transition from friends to kissing
Author	Style333
Upvotes	3
Comments	33
Date	October 7, 2016 2:24 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/56bltn/how_to_transition_from_friends_to_kissing/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/how-to-transition-from-friends-to-kissing.75687 https://theredarchive.com/post/75687

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