I’ve always been labeled as quiet and introverted. My last two jobs people describe me as quiet and say things like I don’t talk.

Even on dates I’m told this. They wonder if I even like them. Girls almost always say I’m hard to read.

I just feel like it takes me a while to open up to people and start showing my personality. I think I fear that people will reject my personality. I always say things in my head and am just afraid of putting myself in a position to be rejected by someone. This happens everywhere, at the gym, work, with new people. The only people I don’t feel this with is people with low smv. I think it probably has to do with growing up as a nerdy kid in middle school, always being intimidated by the cool popular kids. In high school I went to an all academics school so it was pretty much all the nerdy kids from middle school in one high school. And then in college I studied engineering so yeah lol.

Had a first date yesterday where a girl said I was emotionless and quiet. My mentality was just like “man fuck this”. I was just sick and tired of hearing that from people and I just gave up. The date got awkward af after that because I shut down. In that moment I just didn’t care and was over the whole date. I just got sick of constantly being told that by people. I felt like I was trying not to be so emotionless and thought I was smiling enough, but when she said that I just gave up. I didn’t care to make the situation better I just wanted to go home.

She was trying to be playful and tease me but I guess it just wasn’t my day. We ended up parting ways, it got less awkward and she still messaged me a bunch afterward.

But yeah basically I feel like I’m told this by everyone in all aspects of my life. Yesterday I just got fed up with it. I’m 25. How do I stop being this type of person? I almost always have a serious face on and it’s hard for me to smile at people. I tend to have low energy with people unless I get comfortable after a while of being around them.