Couples Counseling - Pointless

Mescalito_1 · 2020-12-09T16:15:36+00:00

In my experience....her distrust of you is likely misplaced distrust of herself. My exW accused me of cheating and was distrustful of me while she cheated. FWIW - I was faithful. Second, marriage counseling is worthless and a waste of money in my opinion.

Repulsive-Ad-5219 · 2020-12-09T22:55:43+00:00

I was in a similar situation. After 4 months of marriage counseling, we both gave up. I had planned for a knock-down, drag-out fight, but it ended up being mutual. All of my prep work allowed me to move VERY quickly with the paperwork while the feelings were all positive, and got mostly everything I wanted very early on signed and included in the complaint. Speaking for myself, what I thought was going to be a horrifying fight about splitting up wasn’t. It’s not always a worst case scenario.

Still working on the custody thing though.

Strike first, strike fast, strike hard.

syro23 · 2020-12-10T19:12:55+00:00

The issues she has with you are not admissible because of how she found them? This is a relationship, not a fucking court of law. Sounds like you need to start taking responsibility for your actions regardless of getting divorced or not.

It sounds like her mistrust was well placed. If you have to keep so much private from her maybe its you who can't trust her cause you are doing dumb shit you have to keep hidden.

The main issue is you have stuff to hide, not that she is trying to find out what that is.

and yes marriage counseling is useless when one or both parties want out.

IvoShandor · 2020-12-13T13:31:02+00:00

This is behavior I do not understand. I have a very good friend of mine whose wife takes his phone the minute he enters the door. She goes through all his emails all his texts, his social media. It’s almost like a routine. The worst thing is, is that he is a good man, he is a good husband… When the boys are out sometimes doing “the thing“, he never partakes. He’s committed… She’s a psychopath.

Based on my personal experience, if you’re going to couples counseling, it’s too late. Therapy works for many people, but Couples counseling is just avoiding ripping the Band-Aid off.

Title	Couples Counseling - Pointless
Author	PushinNShovin
Upvotes	5
Comments	8
Date	December 9, 2020 3:37 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/k9tzq6/couples_counseling_pointless/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/couples-counseling-pointless.817686 https://theredarchive.com/post/817686

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