Should I, a traditionally feminine woman start approaching men?

Starforce2005 · 2021-06-23T02:43:48+00:00

Feminism had made men in general impossible to "move first" as you wished, because of all the accusation he could receive, it will not only tarnish his reputation(which is bad enough), it has actual legal consequences. And marriage is even worse, its basically a contract that benefits the breaker. Unless this changes, traditional men will go on the decrease side of the trend, i'm afraid it will be even harder to find in the future.

So yeah, just make the first move.

By the way even if you do make the first move, he is still not free from the risk of accusation, so be more understanding if he is hesitate, its not because he is not "men enough", its just how the situations are now. So instead of making "hints" you could probably starting to read his "hints" if you think he might be interested in you in return.

Just understand, male are in huge risk by just showing affection. The interpretation is up to the female. Women are more likely to regard the showing of affection by men that looks inattractive being pervert, creepy or even rapist, while the same action done by a men that look attractive is perfectly ok. But the men in question is hard to know for sure if himself is consider attractive or not by the other, thus making the first move will not make sense, the risk is too high.

intactUS_throwaway · 2021-06-23T05:59:16+00:00

Call me paranoid, but this reeks of honeypot.

2021-06-23T02:16:20+00:00

Some men may be "scared," but plenty others have realized that the risk simply is not worth the reward.

The effect of modern feminism is that you are much less likely to be "courted/approached/chased." Men are severely punished for doing much, much less now. You may or may not be part of that threat in reality, but men see you and recognize that you could ruin their lives on a whim if you so choose, if they do so little as hit on you or treat you to a bad date. It's happened too many times to too many men, already.

Edit: You claim to be "traditionally feminine" and an "aspiring housewife" and yet your account is literally you monetizing your sexuality. You even advertise your CashApp and a future OnlyFans in your Bio. This is absurdity at the highest level, and I refuse to believe that you mean anything you said in this post.

DavidByron2 · 2021-06-23T03:18:03+00:00

Your problem is that under feminism the male sex role in approaching / initiating relationships has been criminalized. While this doesn't criminalize your role it does mean it's less likely a man will take the risk of legal trouble. On the plus side (for you) you'd probably prefer the kind of guy who risks a small chance of legal trouble just to talk to you. If you can actually get it to happen.

I would rather be courted/approached/chased than do that to the man myself

Sure everyone hates doing it so you make the man do it because you have the power. We get it. But now it's happening less.

I do all the hints obviously. I’m a little flirty when I’m really drawn to somebody

So this is easy. You have an easy solution. Hint harder. You may THINK you hinted sufficiently but let me tell you, no, you haven't. You may THINK there is absolutely no way this guy could possibly miss this, but let me assure you oh yes he could. This is because for a lot of guys they have NEVER had a woman flirt with them so they have no idea what you're doing. Oh and never come across as drunk.

Try /r/AskMen if your hints seem pitched about right maybe?

Reddit1984Censorship · 2021-06-23T00:48:58+00:00

Is not ''scare'' is un-motivation, un-incentive to do it, it is not worth the investment.
Thanks to feminism theres no room for traditional gener roles sadly.
Im interested if you wanna tell me about in what would you do for a traditional man as a traditional woman, what do you bring to the table if that makes sense, what are you gonna provide him that makes his life better?

2021-06-23T06:39:39+00:00

You’ll have to make the first move more than likely. Feminism has created a situation where there is no upside to a man for making the first move and potentially endless amounts of downside. Just another side effect of toxic femininity.

Successful_ChadErwin · 2021-06-23T00:46:54+00:00

Not sure this is the best subreddit for this. But anyway, have you tried having friends or family members set you up with someone?

Frank_Bianco · 2021-06-23T03:43:34+00:00

We're all just folk. Be honest and express interest in someone who interests you. Expect the same from others without judging or disrespecting someone for doing the same. It's not a head game, or a political maneuver, it's a matter of mutual respect.

Don't let the internet form any expectations for you. Men and women have the same insecurities, try actually talking to people before hiding behind the anonymity of hook up apps. It sounds like you aspire to actually relate to someone.

Hot-Responsibility63 · 2021-06-23T00:33:07+00:00

And I realize that I used the word feminist as a semi insult, DONT come for me. I said it for a specific reason cause y’all know the type of man I mean. I was trying to paint a specific picture to get everybody to fully understand my point. I’m not a feminist because the feminist movement so often leaves out traditionally feminine women, religious women, desirable women, women of color, trans women and disabled women. They think I can’t be pro woman and traditionally feminine at the same time for some reason which is so dense. I’m about supporting everybody. I’m a humanist not a feminist. I think everybody matters and we all need to bridge these social, cultural and economic divides

chintan22 · 2021-06-23T04:46:25+00:00

Issue here is pursuing a woman can lead to legal consequences, and while there are men who would fit you, they're going to be very hard to find, as many of them are getting easy sex on dating apps, or have walked away from dating for good.

Your fairytale romance may remain just that.

Also, as a traditional woman in your words, wdym. As in terms of expectations and roles?

Lon3Wo1f-117 · 2021-06-23T04:55:11+00:00

Personally, it depends for me. I try not to approach female strangers because I'm an autistic man in the #metoo era, so yeah, very encouraging. BUT, if a woman is friends with a friend of mine, I'll try talking to her and, if I end up liking her, flirting with her. It also might help if you try doing subtle gestures to show a man that you want him to approach you. Sadly, we can't read minds, so we need clues. You might get good ideas on how to do that if you looked it up on Google or YouTube.

TL;DL #metoo is a bitch to navigate, so women approaching us would make things MUCH easier lol

2021-06-23T05:58:59+00:00

Honestly, the best way is just for you to make the first move. Ask them on dates, do nice things for them, compliment them, show them that you genuinely care about them

Tbh works on both dudes and girls, dated both and worked just good

Literally. Just prove that you care and have some fun

teh_chungus · 2021-06-23T10:44:22+00:00

Just ask them on a coffee date. Not much investment, easy to plan schedule-wise. Giving out your number so they can start contacting you will also work.

Men can be pretty dense signal-wise and we're constantly programmed to "respect women" which roughly translates to excluding any sexual or romantic aspect when interacting with women.

PM_ME_NICE_STUFF1 · 2021-06-23T08:39:00+00:00

The answer to the question in the headline is yes. But you'll need to put even more energy into filtering out men you don't want to be with in the end. That would be worth it for me, but that's because that's how it's always been.

Even if you drop the men rather quickly (lets' be honest, good matches are hard to find, whether you are a woman or a man) you'll make many mens day by approaching them. It's a huge compliment to be approached by a woman.

maxlvb · 2021-06-23T05:57:25+00:00

WTF has this 'wall of text' got to do with men's rights?

Nothing to see here folk's, move along...

No woman is as beautiful as the freedom of MGTOW.

Fun_Manufacturer4099 · 2021-06-23T18:51:47+00:00

Actually men are not scared of women. It is the fact that if a woman finds a man attractive, she will more then likely be pleased he approached her. If she doesn't find him attractive, she will more than likely shame him, be rude to him and pretty much drag him through the mud. If he knows her from work, he could lose his job. If he knows her from a social circle, he will be talked about behind his back.

The other part of this is, if a man acts masculine, he will be labeled as an abuser. This has happened to me many times and I have never touched a woman out of anger. Many women want a masculine man who conforms to the traditional gentleman role. Although, I have only met two women in my 53 years who I could say conformed to the traditional role of being a lady. I am not talking women I have dated. I am talking all women I have ever met. Even my own mother did not fit into this category. One of the women was one of my grandmother's and the other is the woman I am currently with. I am talking about the traditional role of a lady, not the newage one that basically qualifies any female as a lady. I also know that many younger men are completely against marriage and having children now. Many are even avoiding relationships all together.

PM_ME_DNA · 2021-06-25T19:47:13+00:00

Yes, be more open about your intentions. Tell him that you're open for him only. If you still want to be pursued, give him blatant hints.

Games_Bond · 2022-04-04T21:29:47+00:00

You're asking in the completely wrong subreddit.

In this subreddit you're going to hear from a bunch of guys that can't accept responsibility for themselves or accept that there are a bunch of assholes out there that make up the population of creeps, and they're going to blame women for their issues, and if they drink the kool-aid enough, they'll start hating women and become the assholes themselves.

The reality is this, the same it's been for decades. People, regardless of sex are afraid of rejection. It doesn't matter what sex you are, the fear of rejection is enough to make many never take that first step. If you're interested in someone, pursue them until they reject you. It's sadly that simple, but you have to be OK with rejection.

Title	Should I, a traditionally feminine woman start approaching men?
Author	Hot-Responsibility63
Upvotes	28
Comments	22
Date	June 23, 2021 12:29 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/o61cis/should_i_a_traditionally_feminine_woman_start/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/should-i-a-traditionally-feminine-woman-start.825652 https://theredarchive.com/post/825652

Comments