Coming out as a RPW to friends

SouthernAthena · 2016-12-05T23:58:45+00:00

OMG! Another former roller derby player! That's awesome. I played for 3 years and agree it's probably the most feminist sport. I also love Girl Writes What. As for navigating friendships...I usually keep my mouth shut unless it's something I feel is really important. One instance w/ my derby teammates, a gal was talking about her husband like a child, saying he was helpless and that you just need to treat men like crap etc. She was sort of looking for me to commiserate, and I just said something to the effect of "I respect my boyfriend and think he should be treated well." Something totally uncontroversial, but you should have seen the backpedaling.

For most of my (decidedly liberal) friends, I mostly say things like "I've gotten pretty conservative in the last few years" and "I believe in traditional gender roles," "I like being feminine," and if I dare, "I'm not really a feminist anymore." I pick my battles if you will, only letting my closest friends get a glimpse of the depth of my red pilling. I find with most of my friends, if you just say something subtle and move on, no one is too bothered.

VigilantRedRooster · 2016-12-05T17:50:53+00:00

There are two emerging groups on the TRP side of the manosphere for those who want to meet up in person. One is a private and exclusive fraternity, one is specifically for those who want to put a public face on Manosphere issues and TRP.

Several RPW have expressed an interest in forming some type of meetup group too, which would also discuss "coming out" as RPW to peers. This group will be completely independent and is currently in the very early planning and list building stages. If you're interested, PM your city, state, and a little about your goals for meeting other RPW to our mod u/thescarlettwoman for safekeeping. She'll keep everyone informed.

FilmerandHobbes · 2016-12-05T22:00:00+00:00

From being a MRA for over a decade and a Red pill swallower for years, I can guarantee you that you will absolutely be met with hostility - especially since most people find TRP/RPW when in a time of self-improvement (aka their love life looks like shit). It would be better to simply apply the principles to yourself and if someone asks for marriage advice (unsolicited), you have a window. Otherwise, everything you say will be taken in the worst possible way. Being with an aspy poses similar friendship risks. I understand his mind but most people translate it with an entirely different code.

FilmerandHobbes · 2016-12-06T00:24:03+00:00

I appreciate the traditional women and advice that I find in RPW, but I don't need a title. I share my conservative views and traditional gender preferences with my friends and they're supportive, despite disagreeing. I don't need to identify with a larger group. Perhaps the answer isn't so much to wear your Red Pill badge, but to find more likeminded friends. These women will not support TRP.

mLii · 2016-12-06T12:06:20+00:00

Avoid using terminology. Just tell them you're more of a traditional woman and that it makes you happier and has improved your life.

JackGoldsteinWrites · 2016-12-05T20:44:03+00:00

My girlfriend (basically wife in all but name) evolved into an RPW during the decade she has been with me, and she tried to reconnect with old college+university her friends after 10+ years, because she had found that her soc. In university she was much more pro-fem and all that package that comes with naivete of youth.

10 years on, her friends stayed in the same entrenched positions, most of them are unhappy, 3/4 divorced, and she found the experience hollow. She told me they seem like big children blaming everyone else for their problems, having difficulty moving on past late adolescence and early adulthood, did not develop any substance to make up for their fading beauty (which makes them very bitter) and not facing the realities of the world, and she no longer finds them or their conversation interesting. They have diverged too far apart.

My advice is to really scope them out early on with subtle clues; women who are not RPW are generally hostile to it (at first), and your happiness won't sway them otherwise. You may be better off keeping the cards closer to your chest.

I do the same on the guy side... Younger captains in the making will ask me how to be happy in a relationship, and I gauge their receptiveness with a comment like "I really think men and women are different". Negative reaction = "Don't know dude, I can only run my own relationship", curiosity or positive reaction = actual advice. FWIW, it's been our experience that the more RP you become, the less you are interested in BP company.

StrawberryIceQueen · 2016-12-06T01:40:31+00:00

This might not be the most useful advice but my approach is to not take things too seriously. Yeah I'm conservative and love RPW, but I don't think everyone around me necessarily has to act or think the way I do. I might talk about those aspects of myself, but in an extremely light-hearted way. I know people want to come to me for advice because while I may say some very sensible things, everything is a joke to me. A lot of times they actually do end up taking my advice because while it might be radically different from their own views it's wrapped in this funny, goofy package.

Tldr; don't take yourself too seriously (: be fun and have fun

[deleted] · 2016-12-06T06:19:39+00:00

In the USA, only around 20% of women identify as feminists. In the UK I believe it is less at around 10%. More women are open to the red pill than you realize. The greatest achievement of feminists I believe has been convincing everyone that their opinions and lifestyle is normative. Feminists are masculinzed women. Their desires, wants, and the beliefs that emerge from those desires and wants are fundamentally non-normative for their gender.

(I will concede that their proportion is likely higher at colleges and so if you draw your friend groups exclusively from there and from 'feministy' subjects than the proportion will seem (and be) higher. The proportion might also be higher among younger women but I have no evidence either way to confirm or dis-confirm this, I just think it might be the case because younger people tend to be more politically naive and take a few years to grow into their true beliefs and hence tend to just parrot the fashion of the day.)

See this study for evidence:

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/25250010

Feminist activist women are masculinized in terms of digit-ratio and social dominance: a possible explanation for the feminist paradox.

"Abstract

The feminist movement purports to improve conditions for women, and yet only a minority of women in modern societies self-identify as feminists. This is known as the feminist paradox. It has been suggested that feminists exhibit both physiological and psychological characteristics associated with heightened masculinization, which may predispose women for heightened competitiveness, sex-atypical behaviors, and belief in the interchangeability of sex roles. If feminist activists, i.e., those that manufacture the public image of feminism, are indeed masculinized relative to women in general, this might explain why the views and preferences of these two groups are at variance with each other. We measured the 2D:4D digit ratios (collected from both hands) and a personality trait known as dominance (measured with the Directiveness scale) in a sample of women attending a feminist conference. The sample exhibited significantly more masculine 2D:4D and higher dominance ratings than comparison samples representative of women in general, and these variables were furthermore positively correlated for both hands. The feminist paradox might thus to some extent be explained by biological differences between women in general and the activist women who formulate the feminist agenda."

Willow-girl · 2016-12-06T14:37:22+00:00

Just be who you are! If your friends see you happy in your relationship, they may start wondering and asking questions, and then you can share more. :-)

Title	Coming out as a RPW to friends
Author	StrawberryIceQueen
Upvotes	20
Comments	31
Date	December 5, 2016 5:34 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/5gn763/coming_out_as_a_rpw_to_friends/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/coming-out-as-a-rpw-to-friends.86701 https://theredarchive.com/post/86701

Comments