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"It's OK to ask for help"

micheck492

June 28, 2017
136 upvotes
/r/MensRights
https://i.redd.it/m6outclu0f6z.jpg
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Post Information
Title "It's OK to ask for help"
Author

micheck492

Upvotes 136
Comments 24
Date June 28, 2017 4:45 PM UTC
(9 years ago)
Subreddit Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/6k1teb/its_ok_to_ask_for_help/
Archive Link https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/its-ok-to-ask-for-help.919331
https://theredarchive.com/post/919331
Top posts by micheck492

"It's OK to ask for help"

12 upvotes
June 29, 2017
/r/MensRights

Comments

[–]hotfrspock 56 points57 points58 points 9 years ago* (3 children) | Copy Link

I thought this was a nice thing like showing men can be abused too and it's okay for them to ask for help. Then I read the bottom line πŸ™„πŸ™„

[–]Covalency22 5 points6 points7 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Haha, silly man! Bottle up those emotions and stop being a little biiiitchhh.

/s

[–]trumpolina 1 point2 points3 points 9 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Which is ironic as I know far more women than men, that belong in that poster.

[–]hotfrspock 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Right?

[–]SantaOrange 33 points34 points35 points 9 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

This is nothing short of horrific.

Imagine the human scum that create these posters...

[–]Luchadorgreen 3 points4 points5 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

People love alienating male abuse victims. That's what I've learned from this sub.

[–]Rat_Rod_Body 21 points22 points23 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Ah, ye old double standard in affect. Only men can be abusive eh?

[–]HeForeverBleeds 15 points16 points17 points 9 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

I can only hope no man who was currently suffering as a victim of domestic violence saw this poster, esp. since at first it appears to offer help for male victims. I know how disheartening it is to think you've finally found some organization willing to help you, only to realize it's the same "abusers are always men" and / or "women are always the victims" BS as you find every where else

[–]Pillowed321 2 points3 points4 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

As a man who was in an abusive relationship in college, I didn't see this poster but I did get this same message over and over and it made it very hard to even recognize that I was being abused. She would hit me, threaten me, even burned me with a cigarette but it wasn't until the end that I could realize it was abuse, because of messages like this.

Fuck whoever made this, I spent that relationship asking myself what I was doing wrong because of this

[–]nforne 16 points17 points18 points 9 years ago* (5 children) | Copy Link

It might not be so bad, this is from their website:

This study is a pilot – the first step in assessing whether this group programme works. If successful, we plan to conduct a much bigger study, a randomised controlled trial, which will give us even stronger evidence about its effectiveness. Alongside this study, in the REPROVIDE programme, we will also be interviewing male perpetrators in same sex-relationships, male victims and female perpetrators.

Edit: why the downvotes? This is the first stage of a study that could also look at male victims and female offenders.

Edit 2: but one thing just struck me. The only group they don't intend to study is lesbian offenders, and aren't they the most active domestic abusers of all?

[–]1paleoman 6 points7 points8 points 9 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

Ummm, do they only mean male victims in same sex relationships? If so, yet again, they assume that it is ONLY the men who can be perpetrators.

[–]Dembara 6 points7 points8 points 9 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

They mention female perpetrators.

[–]nforne 2 points3 points4 points 9 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link

Yes but only in hetero relationships. You have to question why they are excluding lesbians from the study, but including gay men.

From our perspective, evidence of DV in lesbian relationships is important as it counters the commonly held belief that it's just a problem with men.

Trying to stay open minded on this but i have my suspicions.

Edit: typo

[–]EsraYmssik 8 points9 points10 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Also from the website http://www.bristol.ac.uk/primaryhealthcare/researchthemes/reprovide/about/:

a training and support intervention for general practice to improve the response to children exposed to domestic violence and abuse (DVA) and men experiencing or perpetrating DVA, enlarging the IRIS model beyond women survivors of DVA (emphases mine)

[–]dukunt 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

So I've read too. Lesbians have the most abusive relationships. And no surprise there, there is no man to blame when things go wrong and women get sexually frustrated when they dont get dicked regularly. At least according to Milo Yiannopolous.

[–]Tex623 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

We should all write to that email address.

[–]ponchato -1 points0 points1 point 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Oh, go fuck yourselves

[+]geniice -6 points-5 points-4 points 9 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link

Is bristol university not allowed to research trying prevent domestic abusers from abusing?

[–]TheExplodingKitten 12 points13 points14 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Of course, but that's not what they're doing. The bottom line reads "call us to join a research study to explore ways of supporting men change their behavior". This assumes the guilt of men. It assumes that men aren't the ones being abused (or if they are, it's their fault). It also doesn't help women being abused by other women; domestic abuse rate is surprisingly high for lesbian couples.

[–]Greg_W_Allan 3 points4 points5 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

As a product the poster is potentially triggering for male victims. They have failed to take their potential audience into account OR they don't care about ALL the victims among that audience.

[–]Pillowed321 2 points3 points4 points 9 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

Are men not victims of domestic abuse? Are all domestic abusers male?

[–]geniice -1 points0 points1 point 9 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

No but for some reason the one's turning up at their GP's asking for help in not abusing their partners lean male. Thus the focus for the pilot study.

[–]nforne 2 points3 points4 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

That's a good point. With all the focus being on male perpetrators, I wonder how many female perps don't even realise that they are abusers, so will never seek help?

[–]splodgenessabounds 2 points3 points4 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

There are (at least) two ways of looking at that statistic:

1) Men are the majority (if not the only) abusers; or

2) More men turn up because the majority (if not all) of abuse campaigns posit men as the abusers (of women).

Correlation, causation...

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