20 years gone

mweite12 · 2020-10-30T15:25:04+00:00

Get help now. I was you 8 months ago. together 16 years, married 10. The first time the words divorce came up was when she already left, i had no clue it was coming. Therapist, church group, friends, family. All of it if you can.

macscheid · 2020-10-30T18:00:10+00:00

I was served in June after 19 years of marriage. Surround yourself with friends, counselors and support groups. I feel for ya brother. We can get through this. I think the extra anxiety, and covid are opening women to a lot of soul searching, especially if things were already somewhat strained. Against every divorce book I've read, I have already been on dates I Believe simply to put my mind on a forward-thinking target. The lack of sleep, the low energy, and the anxiety can all be overwhelming. Keep hope brother.

reallydiditthistime · 2020-10-30T15:39:08+00:00

I feel for you, man. You have to find whatever non self destructive thing you can that takes your mind off it to make you happy. Invest in your kids. Seek someone out that you can make happy. You are going to have to retrain your brain to think differently and it will be the hardest thing you've ever done, but you don't have a choice. Reach out to anyone that will listen...

georeddit2018 · 2020-10-30T15:14:12+00:00

Sorry you going through this. Try and find a way to cope and keep moving forward.

chrizar1971 · 2020-10-30T18:53:20+00:00

I was there man. I lost everything. Trust me when I say it gets WAY BETTER. You will be glad that you no longer have a person who would do something like this to you in your life. Just hang in there and let it process and don’t do anything stupid. Be there for your kids and take care of yourself and this will all blow over. Promise 100%.

opiewaan · 2020-10-30T18:53:33+00:00

25 years married here.

Get a therapist.

It does get better but you need a professional to help you through.

Take care of your children. Make sure they know you love them.

Get a therapist.

It is the hardest thing you may ever go through but go through it you must.

You deserve happiness. You deserve to be loved.

Get a therapist.

metzgie1 · 2020-10-30T17:56:48+00:00

I love you man. It’s gonna be okay. Only time will really heal. Just try to bond with your kids.

2020-10-30T19:39:55+00:00

Stay strong. I echo the therapist recommendation, even if it’s just a therapy app deal where you text back and forth.

adrianmonologovich · 2020-10-30T23:10:46+00:00

Hi mate similar situation here.

I started TRP couple months earlier in light mode. Like I knew something is coming.

I don't know does it help but like with any medicine, you'll never find out for sure. Divorce's EMOTIONAL consequences are like COVID. Hard to predict how much it'll hit you.

Take every tip here seriously and apply. Believe me procastrination is bad choice right now. Do calenistics, buy resistance bands, run, take a bath with essential oils (like me now), meditate. This are first types of purposes to commit to.

gmanix5026 · 2020-10-31T03:13:58+00:00

Express your anger. Don't bottle it. Go hiking by yourself and unleash the loudest yell you can. You need relief.

u8jlm0Ko · 2020-10-30T20:45:39+00:00

Sorry for you my dude

boon0053 · 2020-10-30T22:45:53+00:00

Therapist definitely a huge thing. My wife left on the 12th. Didn’t take anything, and not taking the kids. Mainly because when I found out she was planning, I told her if she wanted to go she should but that was her choice. She’s in hotel now looking for apartments. I’m in two types of therap, traditional and Doc blue pill. Am calm today as she’s here with the kids looking at condos to live in while leaving out house. You wanna be a free bird, I hope it fox’s whatever’s broke. But we’re good here.

mikeh768 · 2020-10-31T14:07:52+00:00

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arkeyu · 2020-11-03T03:17:55+00:00

The society always neglects the effects of divorce on men..it's always about BS feminism...but it's important to find peace.... Something that can't be bought.. Therapy is definitely one way of dealing with it...also try spirituality and logotherapy...there are tons of material on YouTube and SoundCloud..make sure you listen to Osho, J Krishnamurti, Sadhguru, Carl Jung, Jordan Peterson..all very helpful.. The stressed mind is like this huge freight train that's difficult to stop..it stops only when you step aside and watch it without judgement !!

Title	20 years gone
Author	JoBeam439
Upvotes	18
Comments	18
Date	October 30, 2020 2:59 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/jkybjw/20_years_gone/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/20-years-gone.817778 https://theredarchive.com/post/817778

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