There is so much swirling around in my thoughts and I don't want to go down this path unprepared. I've been married for a little over 20years. For the past 5 years its been a rollercoaster. I tell myself to end the relationship and then things turn and I feel like maybe we can make it work. For the past couple years I've gone through stretches of sleeping on the couch. We don't communicate and my middle daughter (16) asks me why we are still together. I think I am finally coming around to the fact that this is just not going to work out and we have a relationship of convenience. We've been faithful to one another but we just don't get along anymore. I love her still and I miss the times when we would sit on the couch holding one another. I can't take that she is so hateful now and can say things in anger without ever apologizing. I know I am not perfect and can be passive aggressive at times but acknowledge it and find ways to compliment her and avoid verbal assaults. At this point I am looking to schedule a time to meet with a marriage counselor and invite her to join. I am not sure she will but that will be the deciding factor on how I feel our chances are.

My question is about assets. We have done very well in our careers and both have about $1million in retirement each as well as a $900K house with about $290 left to pay. My wife make slightly more than I do in salary. My concern is how the house will be divided. If she wants to stay in the house do we just get a fair market analysis and she buys me out? If neither of us want to keep the house and we have to sell do I live in the basement and wait to we get a buyer or does one of us move out and rent while we find a buyer?

What should I start doing now to prepare for the possibility of a looming divorce? I have felt so alone these past few years with what seems like more of a roommate than a wife. I am 54 and in good health and hope if I do go through a divorce there is hope I can meet someone to share my life with and move past this loneliness.