Custody disagreement and resolution

Sunblog-is-cracked · 2026-02-17T13:08:29+00:00

2-2-3 is for diapers

2-2-5-5 is for school aged kids

That’s what I’ve found to be most helpful

DarthDad25 · 2026-02-15T20:02:34+00:00

I am very scared of this same issue. Currently, my soon to be ex wife and I both agree on 50/50 shared parenting with no child support payment for either of us. We both agree that our children need us both and we are both fantastic parents. We messed up as a married couple. It has nothing to do with the children or how we raise them. We actually see eye to eye on almost everything when it comes to the kids. I don’t see that changing!

Here is my concern! I work in law enforcement. I work night shift, weekends and holidays. She has been gracious enough to allow me to have the kids on my scheduled days off, regardless of what the days off are. This also helps her because she is off on the weekends and since I work every weekend, she gets the kids on the weekends.

I’m off Sunday and Monday nights. So I am to have them Sunday, Monday, Tuesday. We swap mid afternoon on Wednesday and she has them Thursday, Friday, Saturday. So it adds up to 3.5 days each a week. But she has been slowly keeping the kids longer and longer on Sundays. So I don’t get them until mid afternoon Sunday. I complained about this, as it’s the only day of the week I get the kids when they don’t have school and I don’t work. She says the personal time the kids have with us when we are home is 50/50, even though the kids are in her “custody” more. She chooses to count hours we each have awake and at home with the kids instead of dividing the week in half. She works long hours during the weekdays so she really only gets to see them Friday evenings and saturdays. That’s why she wants them more Sundays.

It’s hard. I’m appreciative that I am promised to have the kids on my days off which is awesome. But I feel like I’m missing out on a whole day with the kids.

UrAristotle · 2026-02-11T13:41:12+00:00

FWIW, I have a 2-2-5-5 agreement which has worked out very well for my kids. It ends up being more of a 3-2-4-5 arrangement because they’re with me every Sunday night during the school year. Their mom and I agreed to that separate from the decree.

dday_throwaway3 · 2026-02-10T19:29:40+00:00

2-2-3 and 2-2-5-5 is the same outcome: 50% parenting time. 2-2-3 is only for children 3 and under. Once the kids are older, 2-2-5-5 is better and once they are 7 years old 7-7 is the optimum schedule.

The fewer the number of parenting time swaps, the less opportunity there is for conflict.

Rolling-outdoors · 2026-02-10T19:11:00+00:00

Put in multiple options, 3,4,4,3 is what I am doing. I have a 16 yo. Was best so sun- wed Saturday is the flex day was me consistently which is what my son wanted. We also have 7,7 or any other schedule we choose to work out with our son to accommodate school and activities schedules.

notconvinced780 · 2026-02-10T18:42:14+00:00

2255 sounds like it would give you both more flexibility for social stuff, but it has to work for both of your jobs. If it doesn’t, it’s a non-starter.

dystinct · 2026-02-10T18:08:12+00:00

How old are the kids?

Title	Custody disagreement and resolution
Author	Ok-Anything-3605
Upvotes	1
Comments	14
Date	February 10, 2026 5:57 PM UTC (5 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1r17who/custody_disagreement_and_resolution/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/custody-disagreement-and-resolution.1573188 https://theredarchive.com/post/1573188

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