Custody Question

guy_n_cognito_tu · 2025-05-26T13:39:04+00:00

You'll get 50% custody, at best. The courts won't believe that you did all the work, and will take almost anything she says about being a SAHM at face value. She will get child support and alimony.

You need at attorney ASAP. She'll fight for full custody, and many courts will just automatically give it to her. You need to be focused on 50% custody, minimizing alimony, and putting a specific time frame on her gaining full time employment.

rsmiley77 · 2025-05-26T13:18:23+00:00

Yes the court would look at this VERY poorly. You will just annoy the judge if you try and go this route.

I hate to tell you this but you’re going to get screwed when it comes to alimony and child support. Your fight needs to be to make sure your stbx doesn’t get your child full time. The court sees you as one unit that is now splitting. So they’ll ‘split’ your future earnings. She contributes 0. You contribute 100. They probably bring you down to 60 and her up to 40 when it comes to what you’re paying. And flip that with the divide of assets. This is your best case scenario tbh.

HistoricalRich280 · 2025-05-26T02:51:18+00:00

Where are you located. The situation you describe may not exempt you from alimony depending. She may have minimum wage assigned in the calculation if you have to pay.

When you say full custody, do you mean 100%?

I believe that is extremely unlikely unless you have evidence of abuse/neglect. She will need to figure out a post divorce situation, but you supporting the family while married is unlikely to weigh against her in any significant way.

Nor the whole “didn’t watch her for two consecutive days without help”. My ex never had our kids overnight until the split and court was not concerned with that at all.

Thedude1217 · 2025-05-26T02:32:21+00:00

I feel like she has a weak argument a court can easily see through. You can’t claim to be a stay at home mom when your kid goes to daycare and like you said she never has consecutively cared for her. The issue will be the fact she is available for your child technically and also she will argue you agreed to her not having to work all this time. She has a case for alimony, but probably not very long term. Not sure how it will work out custody wise since she can’t financially support herself or your daughter, but again she has the available time to care for her and she may step up if it means free money. I’d like to think since child is already in daycare that that may continue, and ex will get some form of custody with child support and rehabilitative alimony. Never know for sure though it’s all up to a judges discretion unless you can work it out outside of court. Maybe making an agreement you mostly have your daughter and she agrees to attend some sort of college etc. and you will support her basic needs for x amount of years (2 maybe for her to finish a program) then talk about adjusting the schedule in the future based on her work schedule

Title	Custody Question
Author	Difficult-Cheetah904
Upvotes	1
Comments	10
Date	May 26, 2025 12:42 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1kvhj1h/custody_question/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/custody-question.1553003 https://theredarchive.com/post/1553003

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