Greetings Reddit. New account as I don’t want this tied to my usual SN.

I have finally decided to get out. I (37m) will be filing for divorce against my STBXW (34f). We have been together for quite some time and coming up on 8 years of marriage with 2 little ones under the age of 7.

This isn’t my first go at divorce. We started to split via mediation 2 years ago and called it off. She really wasn’t dealing with the whole process well and the mediator actually ended it and told us try collaborative law as my wife was a bit unreasonable. We each met with our attorneys she was the one that wanted to give it another shot. I think the whole reality of a divorce really hit her hard.

I agreed to try again. Things were ok and then new fights started to creep back after about a year. We tried counseling again for a 3rd time and things have been ok, I thought. Apparently that wasn’t the case as I have been feeling a bit ignored. The warm ness is our relation was gone. Reading body language and just her in general and knew something was up. We talked about it and it always seems like there was a new excuse as to why we aren’t working and usually the finger is pointed back at me. I’d try and fix the scenario, no change in relationship.

I’m tired. I was the one that setup our multiple marriage counseling sessions. I am the one that had tried to be more vocal when things aren’t going the right direction. I don’t feel like my efforts are reciprocated. I also don’t feel like she has accepted any responsibility for where our relationship has ended up.

We had a talk this weekend and I was told she loved me but wasn’t in love with me. She also said we should try doing our own things for a while. That’s all I needed to hear. I have no more questions or motivation to try and make this work. I always sort of knew it would fall apart again and I saved everything from the last go-around.

I have recordings of her threatening me, physical abuse and a police report to match. I’m not holding back this time. My happiness is worth more than any amount of money this is going to cost. I’m calling my attorney tomorrow to get the ball rolling. I’m sure I’ll be back with updates.

Thanks for taking the time to let me vent!