So, I decided a while ago (probably 6ish months) that this was the right move for me. I wanted to get some financial ducks in a row before I started the process. Well, that's all done, but now I just can't seem to get the ball rolling...

How have others done it? For some context, we've been marries for 25 years (which is I think a big part of the issue....even though I'm not happy it's....familiar, I guess), dead bedroom for the last 3-4ish. She's lost all respect for me as a man (that's at least partially on me, but at this point I don't think it's fixable) and I just don't know how to start. We have a legal benefit at work that will cover the first 20 hours of time for my lawyer, so that's helpful. But, should I talk to them first? Should I talk to her first?

I just can't figure out how to get going, like what's step one? The big issue is, she's planning to relocate for her job and I just *don't* want to go, but she's already in the planning phases and I don't want to get too far down that path before I pull the plug.

Men that have already been down this path, how did you take the first step?