Losing my mind

Snoo_77789 · 2026-08-16T22:34:20+00:00

I would like to enter my 2 cents since this sub has helped me in my journey and I've never had the opportunity to repay whatever learned via people here. I was in your exact situation. My depression overtook me without me realizing it and she was done with me in what seemed like a new york minute. I too lost my job after and was forced to move back in with my parents, leaving my kids, taking very little more than the clothes on my back and my dog.

 Let me say this, do EVERYTHING someone suggests here to get better. Even if you dont think it will work. Spending energy just trying to make yourself better, even if it fails to take, is better than actively making yourself worse. I made a promise I wouldn't start drinking again and that led me to cutting out other habits.

Worry about getting healthy 1st before tackling the divorce. If you have no other shared assets aside from the house, maintain you financial responsibility to them until you know you're ready to tackle the separation of them. Your health is most important. Drinking won't help it.

 Get a new dog or cat, or go volunteer at the animal shelter. Learning to care for something else that depends on you will give you a new pov.

All in all, dont give up. I was where you are at, so many of us were. This will probably be the darkest time in your life. When you get through this, you'll be able to tackle anything. We all believe in you, its time for you to believe in yourself.

Expensive_Sock_9902 · 2026-08-16T21:12:16+00:00

First things first, get some over the counter sleeping pills, have a camomile tea, and get some sleep. You cant make good decisions when you aren't sleeping properly.

Second quit the booze. Do whatever you need to, to cut it out of your life for a while.

Get into therapy.

Develop a regular exercise routine of some kind. Walking or jogging. Gym. Or even just basic workouts at home. It really does help.

Get yourself right and stable. then the rest will follow.

Watch some Rachel Sloan on youtube if you find it relevant to your situation.

gwg576 · 2026-08-16T20:20:53+00:00

I walked about 8 miles a day just to clear my head. I lost 30 pounds in 3 months.

Street therapy is better than booze.

RevolutionaryLaw8854 · 2026-08-16T19:57:18+00:00

Quit drinking. Alcoholism is a disease. Recovery is a choice.
Go to AA and learn to understand your disease.
Go to church. Even if you’re not religious. Just go and sit in the back. No one ever leaves church feeling worse.
Walk, meditate, pray.

None of those cost money.

Get a job. Or better yet, since you’re broke - get 2. I’m 56 years old and easily work 80 and sometimes 90 hours a week and have for 30 years.
Go to a gym. It’s cheaper than the bars. Best bang for your buck is under some steel.
Get an attorney.

Your marriage is over. She’s done with you. It will taken1 year to grieve the loss of your marriage. You will go through all of the step - denial, bargaining, anger, depression and finally acceptance.

Leave her alone otherwise you’ll end up with a protection order against you.

And quit drinking.

carnivalbilly · 2026-08-16T19:27:17+00:00

You start by calling a lawyer and setting up an appointment. If the first one you call won’t, the next one will…They can also potentially help you with the house situation depending on certification things and maintaining the status quo. Personally I wouldn’t call the woman. At all.

I would recommend for today tho, since it’s Sunday, to eat a decent meal, get some rest and try to focus on the fact you currently do have somewhere to stay and work on things in the morning with a fresh and SOBER head. It seems like it, but I promise you all isn’t lost and it isn’t the end of the world.

No_Chemistry8953 · 2026-08-16T19:03:52+00:00

First things first, slow down. The process of separation/divorce is typically not a fast process. Take a deep breath. Second, reach out to friends, therapist, psychiatrists etc and get yourself some support. You do not have to do this alone. Get away from the booze, that is only going to take more from you.

You had good judgement to not reach out to her, especially in the condition that you are in, as that is not going to accomplish anything that you might want. See if your mom would be open to you staying longer with her until you are more stable. That is what family is supposed to be for.

Only once you are more stable would I encourage you to contact a lawyer and start following their advice. In the meantime, don’t contact your ex.

Title	Losing my mind
Author	SirWild7464
Upvotes	2
Comments	8
Date	August 16, 2026 6:49 PM UTC (2 days ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1vq56vc/losing_my_mind/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/losing-my-mind.1633177 https://theredarchive.com/post/1633177

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